References for SAHM returning to work

[Anonymous]

OP, hang in there! I went back to work after being a full time SAHM for more years than you. That first job back is the hardest step…you can do it.
In my opinion, most employers have already decided to hire you long before they call the references! Most employers trust their guts, their interview techniques, etc. more than they really rely on what a reference says. You just need to produce a couple of names so that an HR person can "check that box." That can be PTA, non-profit, old boss/colleague. Just find someone who'll say yes…and then make sure to agree to be a great reference form someone else after you are re-established!

[Anonymous]

My wife went back after being a SAHM for 15 years. It's been one year in the work force, and I so miss having her at home...lol... I now have to pick up a lot of what I took for granted.

GL OP...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, hang in there! I went back to work after being a full time SAHM for more years than you. That first job back is the hardest step…you can do it.
In my opinion, most employers have already decided to hire you long before they call the references! Most employers trust their guts, their interview techniques, etc. more than they really rely on what a reference says. You just need to produce a couple of names so that an HR person can "check that box." That can be PTA, non-profit, old boss/colleague. Just find someone who'll say yes…and then make sure to agree to be a great reference form someone else after you are re-established!

OP ignore everything but this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you started a nonprofit, can't you find references surrounding that?

I'd think that would trump the PTA.

TBH, unless you're high ranking in the PTA - MCCPTA - people overlook that position.

OP here. Well regarding my non-profit, it's like starting a small business. There's just me and a few volunteers. The PTA is just preschool PTA so not very impressive either.

I probably won't end up getting a job offer for this job but it's a wakeup call to start professional level volunteering so that I can get some up to date references and start reapplying to jobs a year from now.

I can't believe you aren't leveraging this more in your favor. Use your beneficiaries as your references provided it will reflect favorably on you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This thread should be required reading for anyone wanting to become a SAHM.

Op, what do you mean you started a nonprofit? Did it not get off the ground? What's its status now?

I wa a SAHM and this would not have detracted me. Its a little problem that will be solved in a few days. I would not let myself not sah because of a hypothetical problem that is years away.

[Anonymous]

I find it hard to believe that someone doesn't remember you from 4 years ago enough to tell someone whether or not you were good at your job. So, they may or may not like you, but they certainly don't remember you as anything special, and that isn't a reference you want. And you have a past supervisor that didn't like you. I don't know what you were like at your old job, but you may want to chalk that up to a bad fit for references. You also maybe want to think back as to why you can't get a good reference from that job. I'm not saying it to be judgmental, I'm saying it because often people don't see what happened accurately and you may want to self-assess before jumping back into work.

Also, this job is not high paying enough to care much about your references, but I agree that it's good to have them handy. It just helps your esteem. I personally think references are only good if you're on the fence about someone. People aren't going to give you bad references but if they can't manage to find any good ones, that to me is a red flag. Use the PTA references and, possibly, the Principal. Hopefully, you'll get this job and then you'll have good professional references.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, hang in there! I went back to work after being a full time SAHM for more years than you. That first job back is the hardest step…you can do it.
In my opinion, most employers have already decided to hire you long before they call the references! Most employers trust their guts, their interview techniques, etc. more than they really rely on what a reference says. You just need to produce a couple of names so that an HR person can "check that box." That can be PTA, non-profit, old boss/colleague. Just find someone who'll say yes…and then make sure to agree to be a great reference form someone else after you are re-established!

So true and excellent advice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't feel badly!! I didn't work for several years, and used PTA references, and they were totally fine with it. People leave jobs and lose contact so it's hard to keep in touch for references especially if you've left the workforce. I worked in HR, and references are not the end-all be all they used to be. So many people won't give them, or just verify employment, and confident hiring managers will trust their instincts.

Good luck!!!

+1
OP, disregard the negative posters who want to be sure you feel as insecure as possible. I was in your shoes a couple of years ago, and used references similar to yours (PTA, volunteer groups, prior employment even though it was years ago, etc.), but as another poster said, the decision is pretty much made after the interview. If you nail it and connect with them, the references are just an afterthought. Good luck to you!

[Anonymous]

OP here. Just wanted to update. I got the job this week! I am so excited! The references I did provide must have been fine. SAHMs, you can get a job after SAH for awhile, even if your references aren't fantastic.

[Anonymous]

Congratulations -- you must feel great!

[Anonymous]

Congratulations and thanks for the update! Some of the naysayers in this thread were getting me down, as I am about to start navigating my own reentry into the work force.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Just wanted to update. I got the job this week! I am so excited! The references I did provide must have been fine. SAHMs, you can get a job after SAH for awhile, even if your references aren't fantastic.

that's great!
- naysayer

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This thread should be required reading for anyone wanting to become a SAHM.



Op, what do you mean you started a nonprofit? Did it not get off the ground? What's its status now?

Yes exactly. Required reading since SHE GOT THE JOB so go ahead and stay home with your babies and don't listen to anyone who tells you that you will never work again.
I did it too and didn't miss a beat. Same pay, same position, first job I applied for.
So you can stop with your dire warnings and ominous foreboding.

[Anonymous]

CONGRATS!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This thread should be required reading for anyone wanting to become a SAHM.



Op, what do you mean you started a nonprofit? Did it not get off the ground? What's its status now?

Yes exactly. Required reading since SHE GOT THE JOB so go ahead and stay home with your babies and don't listen to anyone who tells you that you will never work again.
I did it too and didn't miss a beat. Same pay, same position, first job I applied for.
So you can stop with your dire warnings and ominous foreboding.

APPLAUSE. Similar situation here. Never, ever have I regretted staying home with my kids.
-signed, a recently returning WOHM who took seven years off.