Please help me poop by tomorrow without interfering with my vacation

[Anonymous]

You can take double the colace dosage

[Anonymous]

0:03-- so hilarious!!

I drink magnesium citrate when I am extremely constipated. (They sell it in the pharmacy.) Drink 1 bottle and follow with 1 large glass of warm water. Wait for it to brew up in your belly-- takes anywhere from 45 minutes to 9 hours to go into effect, so you only want to do this on a day when you can stick around home. Usually I will do 1 major evacuation followed by a few smaller ones over the next couple of hours, and then I feel great. It doesn't give me bad cramps.

[Anonymous]

Taco Bell.

[Anonymous]

enema--fast and predictable unlike many of the other suggestions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Enema, over the counter.

Over the counter?

[Anonymous]

Go to the nastiest store you can think of, like a Wal-mart or something similar. I will immediately have to poop in the nasty bathroom. My bowels hate me.

PS--I often have to poop at Costco, too. And I only poop a couple times a week.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:0:03-- so hilarious!!

I drink magnesium citrate when I am extremely constipated. (They sell it in the pharmacy.) Drink 1 bottle and follow with 1 large glass of warm water. Wait for it to brew up in your belly-- takes anywhere from 45 minutes to 9 hours to go into effect, so you only want to do this on a day when you can stick around home. Usually I will do 1 major evacuation followed by a few smaller ones over the next couple of hours, and then I feel great. It doesn't give me bad cramps.

Dear God please don't do this unless you are looking to spend all night on the toilet! This is the exact same regimen they tell you to do prior to a colonoscopy!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:0:03-- so hilarious!!

I drink magnesium citrate when I am extremely constipated. (They sell it in the pharmacy.) Drink 1 bottle and follow with 1 large glass of warm water. Wait for it to brew up in your belly-- takes anywhere from 45 minutes to 9 hours to go into effect, so you only want to do this on a day when you can stick around home. Usually I will do 1 major evacuation followed by a few smaller ones over the next couple of hours, and then I feel great. It doesn't give me bad cramps.

Dear God please don't do this unless you are looking to spend all night on the toilet! This is the exact same regimen they tell you to do prior to a colonoscopy!

I've done it several times and have never spent all night on the toilet.

[Anonymous]

Magnesium citrate but start with half a bottle!! Dear god. Whoever said to drink two bottles is nuts.

[Anonymous]

Phillips Caplets. It's magnesium. I take 4 with dinner, get up and walk the dog in the morning, and instantly poop when I get back. It all comes out quickly in that one sitting and then it's done, so no need to spend a day with the toilet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Go to the nastiest store you can think of, like a Wal-mart or something similar. I will immediately have to poop in the nasty bathroom. My bowels hate me.

PS--I often have to poop at Costco, too. And I only poop a couple times a week.

This is so true. It happens to me at the grocery store fairly often as well. Why is that??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Enema, over the counter.

Over the counter?

Yep OTC. Fast, easy and predictable. And does not make you have to go for the few hours.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Enema, over the counter.

Over the counter?

Yep OTC. Fast, easy and predictable. And does not make you have to go for the few hours.

+1

Fleet enemas always work for me pretty quickly.

Also may want to use a stool softener in the future if you become irregular.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Eat two fig newtons a day until you're back to normal. Never more than two.

This is hilarious. This would never work for me. Two?? Ten wouldn't do it either.

[Anonymous]

Report, op? Are you "lighter"?