What would you say to a 10 (almost 11) year old DD if she decided she was a vegetarian?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I also think that if you have a child who self selects a limited diet (not talking about a kid with allergies), it's reasonable to explain to her that she needs to be appreciative if nanny makes an effort, and that she can't be super picky on top of being vegetarian.

or, if she is going to be picky, she has to help cook (and plan meals). I'll add here that opinions (yours, hers, the nanny's) about what constitutes picky may vary -- I don't think that a vegetarian should have to eat whatever healthy vegetarian meal is put in front of her, regardless of whether she likes how it tastes (especially when she's the only vegetarian eating). But if she likes only a limited number of ingredients, then she's got to be willing to sacrifice variety (or produce it herself) (or be willing to sub in TV dinners) rather than insist that the people who cook for her learn how to make a dozen different tofu dishes (if that's not something they're interested in doing). OTOH, some carnivores think vegetarians are picky when they don't want chicken or beef broth included in their meals. That's a potential conflict I'd resolve in favor of the vegetarian. Default broth is vegetable -- the carnivores can live with that.

I'm the PP here, and I agree.

[Anonymous]

If nanny can get used to throwing a can of beans or lentils in with the starch, it will be healthy for both kids!

I like the idea of having (protein-rich) veggie burgers in the freezer for your daughter, too, as well as cans of lentil soup and other quick and healthy vegetarian meal options.

It should no more (or no less, depending on your perspective) be the responsibility of your daughter to cook her own vegetarian meals than it is the responsibility of your son to cook his own meat because that is the way he eats.

However, if you're a vegetarian, it would be nice if you could spend some time on weekends making meals with your daughters for good leftovers for both of you-- if you enjoy cooking.

(I grew up in a house where we had to figure out meals for three vegans and a meat-loving omnivore.)

[Anonymous]

I'm sure the nanny is nervous about the meal prep and planning that will be involved. It is a big responsibilty to manage nutrition for active, growing kids. I would sit with your kids and make a list of simple dinners your nanny prepares for them that work and what other things can be added. This would give her a place to start and help her see that it doesn't have to be daunting. They are also old enough to understand that there is work involved in managing appropriate diets and that they each have important nutritional needs that must be met with their respective diets.

[Anonymous]

Is your question, should I let my DD be a vegetarian or is it fair to ask my nanny to prepare two meals? It seems to me those are two very different questions. We are letting our DD (same age) try vegetarianism, I am not cooking separate meals (no nanny here and two FT working parents), There are sides that she can eat and I am keeping items ready for her to supplement for her protein. ie cheese, hard boiled eggs, hummos, veggie burgers, beans, lentils. Quinoa pasta is also a go to for family dinners that makes everyone happy.

[Anonymous]

OP, your son is older. He should make the protein part of his meal. Your nanny should make your daughter the protein part of her meal. I'm shocked that you would ask about the 10 year old meal prep! Very odd.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Feed your daughter what you eat and find a new nanny.

Seriously. This isn't the nanny's decision. If she doesn't want to deal, time to find a new arrangement.

[Anonymous]

Another idea: spaghetti with meatballs for DS and veggie "meatballs" for DD (they can easily be popped in microwave, either frozen or pre-cooked). Or pre-make some lentil patties to throw on the noodles.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why can't your son eat the same thing as your daughter on the days that the nanny cooks?

This. No one needs to eat meat 7 days a week.

What do you all eat on the days that all of you eat together?

Agree- we are seriously un-vegetarian in our house and we still don't eat meat every night. Tend to each eat it once a day but we even have full days being vegetarian too.

Does nanny cook a new meal M-F? If so then maybe you can cut her responsibilities down to 3-4 nights and have one big a big pot/leftover meal? I think having to cook 2-3 dinners is kind of ridiculous even for the people IN the household!

[Anonymous]

OP if you are vegetarian yourself why can't your daughter just eat whatever you are eating?

Must be hard to be a vegetarian family though with a son who can't eat dairy, eggs, or nuts. Holy Moly!!

[Anonymous]

So sound like your nanny is more overwhelmed than lazy.

I would support the DS, but make it as easy on the nanny as possible. Keep veggie burgers, frozen veg alternatives in the freezer. Come up with a few suggested meals that are easy that both kids have something to eat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your nanny is lazy!! Get a new nanny! 10-11 is too young for meal preparation. Seriously, fire your nanny. Fucking lazy!!

+1

WTH is wrong with you people? A nanny is NOT a cook, and she's already fulfilling that role. But now you want her to cook twice as many meals and PLAN them? wtf. Talk about an entitled group of assholes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why can't your son eat the same thing as your daughter on the days that the nanny cooks?

OP here.
He loves his meat. Nanny usually bakes chicken, sometimes they would have grilled steak, chicken wings in hot sauce, etc. Then either pasta/rice or couscous and for vegetables they usually have green beans sautéed with a bit of soy sauce, roasted brussel sprouts, kale chips, little vegetable salad, etc.
There are weeks when nanny cooks 3 times a week. My son hates the idea of tofu and is allergic to milk protein, eggs and nuts.
My nanny's typical schedule is 2 hours before school and two hours after school.
Before school she makes them breakfast, lunches, unloads (and loads) dishwasher, lets the dogs out, gets laundry going and straightens out the kitchen.
After school she makes sure homework is done and drives them to karate 3 times a week. Times vary, so sometimes they eat before and sometimes after. She stays longer when I have meetings. It gets hectic sometimes with the amount of time they have for homework + dinner before karate.

rice & beans, crock pot veggies and beans, make your own burrito with refried beans (and cheese for those who can and veggie cheese for those who can't), pasta with meatless sauce, Indian dishes,

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your nanny is lazy!! Get a new nanny! 10-11 is too young for meal preparation. Seriously, fire your nanny. Fucking lazy!!

+1

WTH is wrong with you people? A nanny is NOT a cook, and she's already fulfilling that role. But now you want her to cook twice as many meals and PLAN them? wtf. Talk about an entitled group of assholes.

Her children are in school, nanny is probably the wrong term. Domestic employee better?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your nanny is lazy!! Get a new nanny! 10-11 is too young for meal preparation. Seriously, fire your nanny. Fucking lazy!!

+1

WTH is wrong with you people? A nanny is NOT a cook, and she's already fulfilling that role. But now you want her to cook twice as many meals and PLAN them? wtf. Talk about an entitled group of assholes.

Her children are in school, nanny is probably the wrong term. Domestic employee better?

If she only works during the hours when the kids are home, and her primary job is childcare, then she's a nanny.

[Anonymous]

I went veg when I was 6 - the only one in my family.

I didn't get whole separate meals. Usually I just ate whatever everyone else was eating, minus the meat. Tacos, with no meat (soy crumble didn't exist back then). Spaghetti and meatballs and salad, with no meatballs.

Americans get enough protein that your daughter'll probably be ok skipping protein with dinner a few times a week if it comes to that.

But you can also just get some prepared chickpea salads and whatnot from the deli, or some frozen falafels, if you want to see her getting protein with every dinner.

I don't see why she can't learn to cook. I never did learn, and still don't really cook for myself much - thank goodness for my husband and restaurants - so can see a few other ways you could also deal with this.

Some 35 years later, I am still very grateful that my parents took my choices seriously. I think your daughter will feel this way, too. It's great you're being so supportive.