Older neighbor hitting on me

[Anonymous]

Why can't you ignore him? Not talk, make eye contact, look the other way if he says hello etc.

Sounds like it would be way easier than confronting him, say you'll call the cops etc. Having a bf has nothing to do with, by that logic you'd go out with him if you were single?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Scott, it would be great to be friendly neighbors with you, but your constant advances make that awkward and it's very uncomfortable. I'm not interested in dating you or being flirted with. Please stop. Thank you for understanding and respecting boundaries."

Do not go stand outside to observe the world. If you go out, go with a specific purpose. To get the paper, to visit Carla across the street, to garden, whatever. That way when Scott tries to stand there making small talk you can say "Nice chatting with you, gotta get on with my day, see ya!" and walk away.

Be LESS polite. I guarantee that what you think is "polite" he thinks is "green light."

Thanks. I have been much less polite and he still asked me to drinks recently. I declined.

Each time he asks you, you need to not only decline but also say "Please stop asking me out, you're making me uncomfortable, I've told you before to stop."

FYI, as a feminist, do not fall into the trap of saying "I have a boyfriend" because it implies you're not available because you belong, as property to another man and you are not property. ::steps off soapbox::

Actually, my problem with that statement implies that she has to have a valid reason for not being interested.

OP, I would be rude. I wouldn't engage in small talk or smile. If he's 20-30 years older and still pursuing, he's not living in reality. I would say things like "you remind me of my grandfather, i'm not attracted to old people". Do not hide in your house. Just do not engage him in a friendly manner at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What, exactly, does his age have to do with it?

Good question.

Well, for one, I'm not interested in dating my Father.

Wow- OP I was with you until this.
Don't be hateful.

NP here. I am a 50 yo man. I can be a bit chatty, with people my age, with people younger. Some might call it flirting. What I will tell you is any 50 yo who wants to date at 20 something has issues. Your life experiences are so different (usually). For example, musical tastes. I really don't know any music produced after 1987 (that I like). I tend to look at world events in a deeper and more holistic manner. I find the naive idealism of the 20 something both cute and endearing. But, it is not a basis for long term relationships. When I see the older man, young woman I know the woman either has daddy issues or is in it for the money. The guy is usually in it for the sex unless is is very immature.

[Anonymous]

ha! Or you are a 50 year old woman that is intimated by younger women. When I see a couple together I think 'cool, they are together'.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The census doesn't consider in a relationship as married. You are either married or single. Until you are married you are free game for any man or woman.

Yes. That's right. I was in a relationahip and still enjoyed sowing my wild oats. You must see what else is out there. But I craved the stability of a steady girlfriend too. I think she "cheated" on me as well.

[Anonymous]

The older man aspect OP mentions just seems like another facet of why this guy is annoying and out of touch. She's said she's not interested, and the age gap just makes it less likely she'd be interested. Most of you aren't with people 25 years older than you are, right?

[Anonymous]

Until he puts a ring on it, you will be offered to hit it

[Anonymous]

#humblebrag

[Anonymous]

OP deserves it, what a terrible way she describes people

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The older man aspect OP mentions just seems like another facet of why this guy is annoying and out of touch. She's said she's not interested, and the age gap just makes it less likely she'd be interested. Most of you aren't with people 25 years older than you are, right?

You keep harping on this. As long as they are consenting adults I really don't give a hoot about the age, gender, race of people in a relationship.
I'm not a saint- but I just don't concern myself with why other folks are in THEIR relationships.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Assuming you are single, OP?

I'm not single, I have a boyfriend. I was single when I moved to the neighborhood. Other neighbors have communicated that I am not single to no avail.

Your relationship status is irrelevant. The only thing that matters is you're not interested.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Assuming you are single, OP?

I'm not single, I have a boyfriend. I was single when I moved to the neighborhood. Other neighbors have communicated that I am not single to no avail.

You are either married or single. Time for your bf to step up and stop slopping down the milk for free.

Oh give me a break. When you are in a relationship you are not free. Are you in a life commitment...no. But that still does not make you fair game. I think you understand what OP means when she says she's not single. She's coupled.

It is irrelevant that she has a boyfriend. She doesn't want the attention, so he needs to back off. The boyfriend may leave at some point and creepy old neighbor will think that she's available for him again. No way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The older man aspect OP mentions just seems like another facet of why this guy is annoying and out of touch. She's said she's not interested, and the age gap just makes it less likely she'd be interested. Most of you aren't with people 25 years older than you are, right?

You keep harping on this. As long as they are consenting adults I really don't give a hoot about the age, gender, race of people in a relationship.
I'm not a saint- but I just don't concern myself with why other folks are in THEIR relationships.

I can't tell if you're being deliberately obtuse or not. Surely you understand that the VAST MAJORITY of people aren't going to date or even be attracted to someone two or three decades older than them?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The older man aspect OP mentions just seems like another facet of why this guy is annoying and out of touch. She's said she's not interested, and the age gap just makes it less likely she'd be interested. Most of you aren't with people 25 years older than you are, right?

You keep harping on this. As long as they are consenting adults I really don't give a hoot about the age, gender, race of people in a relationship.
I'm not a saint- but I just don't concern myself with why other folks are in THEIR relationships.

I can't tell if you're being deliberately obtuse or not. Surely you understand that the VAST MAJORITY of people aren't going to date or even be attracted to someone two or three decades older than them?

Peace be with you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The older man aspect OP mentions just seems like another facet of why this guy is annoying and out of touch. She's said she's not interested, and the age gap just makes it less likely she'd be interested. Most of you aren't with people 25 years older than you are, right?

You keep harping on this. As long as they are consenting adults I really don't give a hoot about the age, gender, race of people in a relationship.
I'm not a saint- but I just don't concern myself with why other folks are in THEIR relationships.

I can't tell if you're being deliberately obtuse or not. Surely you understand that the VAST MAJORITY of people aren't going to date or even be attracted to someone two or three decades older than them?

Peace be with you.

You seem fixated with religion. "Harping" and "saint" and "peace be with you?"

You're weird.