WWYD, father's money being taken by new wife

[Anonymous]

OP this is so tough. We barely missed this. Though our mom died the ladies were circling my father and he was showing obvious signs of losing it. We dodged a particular vulture be actually having one sibling (married with kids and a job!) into his house to be a constant pain in the ass. It was really hard.

Get a lawyer. I think your mom is out of luck. Can you help her? But at least you can stop the abuse of your father. Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Attorney and file a complaint for elder abuse and get adult protective services involved. Maybe it amounts to nothing but it will annoy the new wife.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you are probably getting this bad advice from a bunch of affair partners that hope to do the same.

1. Get a lawyer
2. If you can show you father paid a certain amount to your mom, you can probably sue for that amount.
3. Assets before the 4 yr marriage are not the new wife's, you can protect that money for your father.
4. Take you dad to a doctor and declare Him incompetent if he is incompetent, become his power of attorney.

No many of us are married without ever being "affair partners". Without a legal support agreement, OP does not have much to stand on and should think long and hard about hiring a lawyer to get support for an ex-wife/mother. How long have the parents been divorced? Nowadays alimony is not forever so if they have been divorced for many years, trying to get support even with a lawyer will be a waste of money.

Also, you cannot just take dad to the doctor, declare him incompetent and get power of attorney. He is married so if he is incompetent, power of attorney goes to the wife unless you can show a very good reason why she should not get it and not liking her is not it.

You obviously don't know what affir partner means. Yes, kids get power of attorney over new wives all the times. Ignorant.

I maybe ignorant but know someone married for 4+ yrs is not a "new" wife and getting support for an ex-spouse without a support agreement long after the divorce is basically impossible.

[Anonymous]

1. Get a lawyer
2. It doesn't sound like she's negligent. Is he getting the proper care he needs? Is she taking care of him? Is there a nurse? It will be really hard to argue that she shouldn't be in charge of the money if he's being taken care of.

It sounds like when they married he was in the early stages of dementia and in the past 4 years has become worse. Unfortunately this works against you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you are probably getting this bad advice from a bunch of affair partners that hope to do the same.

1. Get a lawyer
2. If you can show you father paid a certain amount to your mom, you can probably sue for that amount.
3. Assets before the 4 yr marriage are not the new wife's, you can protect that money for your father.
4. Take you dad to a doctor and declare Him incompetent if he is incompetent, become his power of attorney.

No many of us are married without ever being "affair partners". Without a legal support agreement, OP does not have much to stand on and should think long and hard about hiring a lawyer to get support for an ex-wife/mother. How long have the parents been divorced? Nowadays alimony is not forever so if they have been divorced for many years, trying to get support even with a lawyer will be a waste of money.

Also, you cannot just take dad to the doctor, declare him incompetent and get power of attorney. He is married so if he is incompetent, power of attorney goes to the wife unless you can show a very good reason why she should not get it and not liking her is not it.

You obviously don't know what affir partner means. Yes, kids get power of attorney over new wives all the times. Ignorant.

I maybe ignorant but know someone married for 4+ yrs is not a "new" wife and getting support for an ex-spouse without a support agreement long after the divorce is basically impossible.

she knew his medical history. They've actually been married 3.5 years. His decline was rapid after the marriage. Before the complete decline he told people how much he hated her. My parents were married for 49 years, ten kids...

[Anonymous]

So did your mother have a divorce attorney? After 49 yrs of marriage and 10 kids, how did your mother end up without alimony?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So did your mother have a divorce attorney? After 49 yrs of marriage and 10 kids, how did your mother end up without alimony?

+1. Plus, how is it you and your 9 siblings can't work together to take care of your elderly mother!? Can't everyone kick in a few hundred bucks each month to make up for the money lost from her ex?

[Anonymous]

OP, I'm calling you a troll. If not, then you and your mom are idiots. Why in hell didn't she get a legal divorce decree after her 49 year marriage ended? Really tough to feel sympathy for her. And, while your dad may be in bad shape now, I suspect you didn't care about that until he got remarried.

[Anonymous]

Also a lawyer needs to make sure that the divorce went through 100% ... if it didnt, second marriage invalid

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I'm calling you a troll. If not, then you and your mom are idiots. Why in hell didn't she get a legal divorce decree after her 49 year marriage ended? Really tough to feel sympathy for her. And, while your dad may be in bad shape now, I suspect you didn't care about that until he got remarried.

you don't understand spousal abuse and mind control

[Anonymous]

The 10 kids should have got mom a divorce attorney. Sounds like there was none and now your mom has no money.

The 10 kids need to chip in to support mom. You are not going to get money out of the second wife.