DC's "classes" are killing me!

[Anonymous]

OP, honestly consider dropping classes. Here's my take on it - I kinda hate the whole toddler/baby class industry for creating a perception that they need it. They really don't! And they don't socialize much at that stage, especially in artificially created settings!

a. Drop story times. Read the books of your choosing, at the time of your choosing, in the position of your choosing (lying down, sitting down on the couch, whatever!)

b. Drop music classes, what nonsense! Play the music of your choosing at home, sing if you want, give him a rattle if you want, go with the flow!

c. Every day, EVERY DAY without fail take him out to the park or playground or other controlled setting where you can let him loose for a while. Let him get lots and lots of physical activity. If he falls or eats a handful of mulch, it's not a big deal! Once he gets lots of physical activity, he will be wonderfully cooperative and sleep much better.

d. Prioritize sleep, YOUR sleep and your physical fitness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have an active nineteen-month-old boy and am a SAHM. I have him at two library story times, a Music Together class and a Mommy & Me each week. He loves them all and does need the socialization with other kids (he's our first and has no siblings at home yet). The problem is - the classes are physically exhausting to me! In each class the parent participates and sits on the floor (no back support) and even in story time I have to engage him and cajole him to stay seated (talking quietly about the book - "Oh, look at that - the butterfly loves the flower...") That on top of playing with him, reading to him and walking him all over town - I'm tired! I don't do any real housework during the day, it is all him. When he is napping I do his laundry and make a few things in the kitchen for his meals (steamed veggies and such) so I do get a good 30 to 40 minutes to rest - but that is it for the entire 10 hour day without DH.

Is there any activity where I can just sit and watch? And if not, how to I strengthen my back so that sitting on the floor without back support doesn't kill me?

Mom of 12 and 10 y.o. here. OP, please, please listen to me. When he naps, you nap. Just lie down and close your eyes, even if you don't fall asleep. Don't make the room all dark; leave the drapes open. It might take a while to get used to napping. Just do it.

All that other crap can wait and WILL wait. And you CAN do it with him awake. It just might take longer because he will "help" you.

I swear, this is the first thing that comes to mind when I think "if I did it again, what would I do differently"

I finally caved and followed the "nap when they nap" advice...it was absolute heaven! When my son had 2 naps per day, I slept for one and did my own thing (usually yoga) during the other. When he got to one nap/day, I sleot with him and had the energy back to go to yoga classes a few times/week. So, yes -- sleep! And yoga -- great for mind, energy, and your poor aching back! My son is 4.5 now and I often desperately miss those napping days

+1. I didn't usually nap when mine napped but did make a point to stretch out on the sofa with a cup of coffee and a book.

For the core/back issue, I'd say drop a couple current activities and replace with a mom/baby exercise class like yoga or stroller strides. With my toddler our morning routine was typically exercise class 2-3 days per week, one music class, one playgroup. I didn't take him to story time at that age.

OP here and thank you! The Mom and Me exercises classes are a great idea.

He actually loves story time and looks forward to it.

[Anonymous]

Stretching your legs cam really help your back too! When we're on the floor, I work on leg stretches, and also planks for core strength.

My son is 3, and has never been great at playing by himself. But I've always believed in doing chores while ds is awake. It's totally doable, and beneficial for your kid to see.

Also, ditch these structured classes in favor of park time, bounce houses, open gym time, etc. That way neither of you are tied down to the floor, and your kid gets to run free!!

It sounds like you like to pack your day with activities. First, doing some of the basic chores while dc is awake will take up some of that long day. Second, replace some of your outings s with something like a coffee shop visit where dc can sit with a cookie while you have coffee. Then go home.

Also, I'll get flamed for this, but don't forget about tv.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, honestly consider dropping classes. Here's my take on it - I kinda hate the whole toddler/baby class industry for creating a perception that they need it. They really don't! And they don't socialize much at that stage, especially in artificially created settings!

a. Drop story times. Read the books of your choosing, at the time of your choosing, in the position of your choosing (lying down, sitting down on the couch, whatever!)

b. Drop music classes, what nonsense! Play the music of your choosing at home, sing if you want, give him a rattle if you want, go with the flow!

c. Every day, EVERY DAY without fail take him out to the park or playground or other controlled setting where you can let him loose for a while. Let him get lots and lots of physical activity. If he falls or eats a handful of mulch, it's not a big deal! Once he gets lots of physical activity, he will be wonderfully cooperative and sleep much better.

d. Prioritize sleep, YOUR sleep and your physical fitness.

Disagree. These activities are very important. Music Together, up through age 3, was awesome. Our daughter, who is musically inclined, loved everything about it, and the CDs made long road trips fun.

[Anonymous]

Why are you doing so many classes? Also he needs to learn to play by himself, not expect to be engaged by someone all the time.

[Anonymous]

Good for you OP you sound like a great mom. The only thing that has ever helped me with sitting is a daily yoga practice. You are only as young as your spine is flexible. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

WAY too many structured activities.

Developmentally, toddlers don't need that kind and amount of structure to learn.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:WAY too many structured activities.

Developmentally, toddlers don't need that kind and amount of structure to learn.

Four a week is too many? I disagree 100%. Toddlers do need socialization and learn to sit and participate. That is the entire point of the classes. I do a lot of classes with my toddler, too. It adds structure to our day and like OP, I do them in the morning. In the afternoons, DD and I run around the park or go swimming.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:WAY too many structured activities.

Developmentally, toddlers don't need that kind and amount of structure to learn.

Four a week is too many? I disagree 100%. Toddlers do need socialization and learn to sit and participate. That is the entire point of the classes. I do a lot of classes with my toddler, too. It adds structure to our day and like OP, I do them in the morning. In the afternoons, DD and I run around the park or go swimming.

With names like Music Together and Mommy and Me, that should be a clue that these classes are for the parent, not the child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:WAY too many structured activities.

Developmentally, toddlers don't need that kind and amount of structure to learn.

Four a week is too many? I disagree 100%. Toddlers do need socialization and learn to sit and participate. That is the entire point of the classes. I do a lot of classes with my toddler, too. It adds structure to our day and like OP, I do them in the morning. In the afternoons, DD and I run around the park or go swimming.

With names like Music Together and Mommy and Me, that should be a clue that these classes are for the parent, not the child.

Not true - at that age the children need guidance from the parent or caregiver in a structured setting. If I was taking a class just for myself it sure as hell wouldn't be either one of these classes!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:WAY too many structured activities.

Developmentally, toddlers don't need that kind and amount of structure to learn.

It doesn't sound like she's worried about his education, she's happy, he's happy and they're out of the house. I've been a sahm and my dh worked 80 hours a week. There is a LOT of awake time to fill up. The days get really long and having some structure really helps.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get why moms of newborns need naps. But SAHMs of toddlers - really?? Two story times and two paid classes are exhausting you? I'm not calling troll, but this seems like a very tolerance for activity, OP. Have you had a physical exam to see if you're anemic or if you have some other medical condition that is causing you to feel so drained by such a modest schedule?

And PS, if your child has to be cajoled and engaged by you constantly in order to listen to the stories during story time, he's probably still too young.

I didn't do much classes, but I found the toddler months physically exhausting. My kids were little engines on legs, constantly going, getting into everything. Very hard, physically. They slowed down as they got older.

Word.

The newborn days were a breeze in comparison...when they just laid still and weren't on a constant suicide mission.

You child proof your house and let them run free and you get to sit. This isn't rocket science

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, honestly consider dropping classes. Here's my take on it - I kinda hate the whole toddler/baby class industry for creating a perception that they need it. They really don't! And they don't socialize much at that stage, especially in artificially created settings!

a. Drop story times. Read the books of your choosing, at the time of your choosing, in the position of your choosing (lying down, sitting down on the couch, whatever!)

b. Drop music classes, what nonsense! Play the music of your choosing at home, sing if you want, give him a rattle if you want, go with the flow!

c. Every day, EVERY DAY without fail take him out to the park or playground or other controlled setting where you can let him loose for a while. Let him get lots and lots of physical activity. If he falls or eats a handful of mulch, it's not a big deal! Once he gets lots of physical activity, he will be wonderfully cooperative and sleep much better.

d. Prioritize sleep, YOUR sleep and your physical fitness.

This is good advice. I particularly agree with the bolded. Toddlers do not need all these classes you pay for.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:WAY too many structured activities.

Developmentally, toddlers don't need that kind and amount of structure to learn.

Four a week is too many? I disagree 100%. Toddlers do need socialization and learn to sit and participate. That is the entire point of the classes. I do a lot of classes with my toddler, too. It adds structure to our day and like OP, I do them in the morning. In the afternoons, DD and I run around the park or go swimming.

No they don't.

Toddlers do not need that kind of structure to learn. It is developmentally inappropriate. Mom might need those classes for socialization but the toddler does not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I get why moms of newborns need naps. But SAHMs of toddlers - really?? Two story times and two paid classes are exhausting you? I'm not calling troll, but this seems like a very tolerance for activity, OP. Have you had a physical exam to see if you're anemic or if you have some other medical condition that is causing you to feel so drained by such a modest schedule?

And PS, if your child has to be cajoled and engaged by you constantly in order to listen to the stories during story time, he's probably still too young.

I didn't do much classes, but I found the toddler months physically exhausting. My kids were little engines on legs, constantly going, getting into everything. Very hard, physically. They slowed down as they got older.

Word.

The newborn days were a breeze in comparison...when they just laid still and weren't on a constant suicide mission.

You child proof your house and let them run free and you get to sit. This isn't rocket science

No, obviously it isn't rocket-science but it isn't that simple either. OP's kid is a toddler and toddlers are not well-known for their ability to self-occupy.