So what bad stuff does happen at frat and sorority events?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was very active in Greek life in a southern sorority in the mid 90s. The school, nor the national chapters, didn't tolerate shit. They would shut down a house in a heartbeat. Yep, I went to a lot of parties with a lot of drinking. Also went to a lot of non-Greek parties with a lot of drinking. Certainly new girls who were assaulted. But again, that was both in and out of Greek system.

You kid yourselves if you think the Greek system is the problem and it would all magically go away if we did away with fraternities and sororities.

Is the Greek system THE problem? No. Is it a huge contributor to the problem? YES.

+1

[Anonymous]

Agree that the Greek system often does horrible things....however, they also do a lot of great stuff (charities, community events, fundraising.) There are also "nice" frats and sororities who want to have a "good time" BUT do not cross the line to do any of the horrible things mentioned earlier on this thread. I was in a sorority at Syracuse U, FWIW.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was super active in greek life in college. With that being said, I had two friends die, one from alcohol poisoning and another from drugs, after frat parties. Another friend of mine was raped, given a drug and passed out and when she woke up something was raping her. I was also the GF of a frat guy and had guys expect that I would be passed around to them as a "present" (their words) when my BF (their frat bro) was done with me. Seen people go into shock from drugs, had to be taken to the hospital in an ambulance, from drugs. All of that stuff with the exception of the two deaths, got brushed under the rug and never touched by any media. But I saw much of it with my own eyes and talked to my friend about her rape and saw the pain in her eyes. The older I get the more I realize how dangerous that scene is, even though it can be a lot of fun.

WTF? Did you go to University of Compton?

How is that we are talking about abuses perpetrated by white affluent kids and you somehow manage to take a swipe at a black city? WTF? The black commnity has enough of its own issues without being associated with degraded white culture.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was super active in greek life in college. With that being said, I had two friends die, one from alcohol poisoning and another from drugs, after frat parties. Another friend of mine was raped, given a drug and passed out and when she woke up something was raping her. I was also the GF of a frat guy and had guys expect that I would be passed around to them as a "present" (their words) when my BF (their frat bro) was done with me. Seen people go into shock from drugs, had to be taken to the hospital in an ambulance, from drugs. All of that stuff with the exception of the two deaths, got brushed under the rug and never touched by any media. But I saw much of it with my own eyes and talked to my friend about her rape and saw the pain in her eyes. The older I get the more I realize how dangerous that scene is, even though it can be a lot of fun.

WTF? Did you go to University of Compton?

I've got $20 that says PP went to Washington University in St. Louis.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was super active in greek life in college. With that being said, I had two friends die, one from alcohol poisoning and another from drugs, after frat parties. Another friend of mine was raped, given a drug and passed out and when she woke up something was raping her. I was also the GF of a frat guy and had guys expect that I would be passed around to them as a "present" (their words) when my BF (their frat bro) was done with me. Seen people go into shock from drugs, had to be taken to the hospital in an ambulance, from drugs. All of that stuff with the exception of the two deaths, got brushed under the rug and never touched by any media. But I saw much of it with my own eyes and talked to my friend about her rape and saw the pain in her eyes. The older I get the more I realize how dangerous that scene is, even though it can be a lot of fun.

WTF? Did you go to University of Compton?

How is that we are talking about abuses perpetrated by white affluent kids and you somehow manage to take a swipe at a black city? WTF? The black commnity has enough of its own issues without being associated with degraded white culture.

Seriously-and in addition to the fact that if 7 black men raped a white woman they would be considered animals who should be put down, but if it's "nice" white college boys they must've just gotten too drunk and made some bad choices.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know about 2 gang rapes at frats at Hampton Sydney in the 1980s; went to college with both girls. Doesn't include all the date rapes I heard about, with some guys adulterating drinks and weed.

I knew frat guys at other colleges who called the "regular" girls who would come to their parties "coke whores and shroom sluts"--again in 80s Virginia -- basically girls came in and did drugs, and it was perceived they were there to do whatever the guys wanted.

After my freshman year I stayed away from all frats, especially the ones with the richer guys. When I did go to a party I got my own drink and did not let it out of my sight. My friends and I made agreements to stick together and I'm so glad we did.

Did you go to Sweet Briar, RMWC, Hollins or Mary Baldwin? I went to one of the women's colleges in the late 80s and I could see it have easily happening but never heard of it from someone I knew. I hung out at different times at W&L, H-S and UVA but I pretty much always had a boyfriend. Still, bad stuff certainly went on and everyone was always drunk as hell.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was super active in greek life in college. With that being said, I had two friends die, one from alcohol poisoning and another from drugs, after frat parties. Another friend of mine was raped, given a drug and passed out and when she woke up something was raping her. I was also the GF of a frat guy and had guys expect that I would be passed around to them as a "present" (their words) when my BF (their frat bro) was done with me. Seen people go into shock from drugs, had to be taken to the hospital in an ambulance, from drugs. All of that stuff with the exception of the two deaths, got brushed under the rug and never touched by any media. But I saw much of it with my own eyes and talked to my friend about her rape and saw the pain in her eyes. The older I get the more I realize how dangerous that scene is, even though it can be a lot of fun.

None of that sounds remotely like fun. If you knew at the time that other guys expected you to be passed around -- how did you feel about it then? Not in hindsight, but at the time?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was super active in greek life in college. With that being said, I had two friends die, one from alcohol poisoning and another from drugs, after frat parties. Another friend of mine was raped, given a drug and passed out and when she woke up something was raping her. I was also the GF of a frat guy and had guys expect that I would be passed around to them as a "present" (their words) when my BF (their frat bro) was done with me. Seen people go into shock from drugs, had to be taken to the hospital in an ambulance, from drugs. All of that stuff with the exception of the two deaths, got brushed under the rug and never touched by any media. But I saw much of it with my own eyes and talked to my friend about her rape and saw the pain in her eyes. The older I get the more I realize how dangerous that scene is, even though it can be a lot of fun.

WTF? Did you go to University of Compton?

Actually my school costs more than $50,000 a year (by a lot). It's one of the most expensive schools in the country and well respected. It also has a rep for being a party school for rich kids, hence the stuff I described.

U of R?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was super active in greek life in college. With that being said, I had two friends die, one from alcohol poisoning and another from drugs, after frat parties. Another friend of mine was raped, given a drug and passed out and when she woke up something was raping her. I was also the GF of a frat guy and had guys expect that I would be passed around to them as a "present" (their words) when my BF (their frat bro) was done with me. Seen people go into shock from drugs, had to be taken to the hospital in an ambulance, from drugs. All of that stuff with the exception of the two deaths, got brushed under the rug and never touched by any media. But I saw much of it with my own eyes and talked to my friend about her rape and saw the pain in her eyes. The older I get the more I realize how dangerous that scene is, even though it can be a lot of fun.

None of that sounds remotely like fun. If you knew at the time that other guys expected you to be passed around -- how did you feel about it then? Not in hindsight, but at the time?

I was kind of shocked and horrified. Probably more shocked then than I am now, since I can look back and laugh. It made me feel totally uncomfortable, like I was a steak surrounded by lions, and definitely made me try to pull my bf away from fraternity events.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think everyone knows that these things happen at frat/sorority parties. If you went to college, then none of this is new.

Not true. I deliberately went to a college with no greek system. And some schools are worse than others. Also, I think there's something about the current media glorification of raunch/porn/rudeness/extreme behavior that is possibly making the situation worse.

[Anonymous]

Back in the 80s at my Southern U I dated a guy from one of the 'bad' frats. They were considered fun but some of the guys were total pigs. A sorority sister of mine was kicked out for having sex with multiple men during a one wild party. . She was drunk out of her mind and a second semester freshman. I was so disgusted By the way she was treated I quit the sorority. Nobody called it rape . The frat referred to it as a train coming through the house - it had a sort of legendary status. My boyfriend was disgusted too but didn't want to get involved. My sorority president was most concerned about its reputation. This same fraternity had a pledge award for who had sex with the ugliest, fattest chick. I'm embarrassed to write this but it needs to be said. Is that bad enough for you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think everyone knows that these things happen at frat/sorority parties. If you went to college, then none of this is new.

Exactly why I chose a school with no Greek system.

[Anonymous]

The Greek system has outlived its purpose. It's a convenient way to buy friends, parties and be entitled while doing a bit of philanthropic volunteering. I was active many years ago in a sorority--became inactive after 2 years--and can only imagine how the out of control mean and illegal behavior has multiplied since then. I know this behavior can occur within all kinds of groups, not just Greek organizations. Let's see what UVA does. Obviously, these complaints aren't new to them and they have chosen to shove violent behavior under the rug. Sullivan should be removed, imho. Along with other University heads/faculty who behave as she has.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Back in the 80s at my Southern U I dated a guy from one of the 'bad' frats. They were considered fun but some of the guys were total pigs. A sorority sister of mine was kicked out for having sex with multiple men during a one wild party. . She was drunk out of her mind and a second semester freshman. I was so disgusted By the way she was treated I quit the sorority. Nobody called it rape . The frat referred to it as a train coming through the house - it had a sort of legendary status. My boyfriend was disgusted too but didn't want to get involved. My sorority president was most concerned about its reputation. This same fraternity had a pledge award for who had sex with the ugliest, fattest chick. I'm embarrassed to write this but it needs to be said. Is that bad enough for you?

I also knew a story like this. One of the frats I knew had a policy where if one of the members was hooking up with a girl the other members deemed unattractive, they would drag a large rock into the room (it usually stood in the entryway). The girl probably didn't know what was going on and all the members would laugh about it.

and this was not a rumor- I was told about it by a member of the fraternity himself.

Another member of that same fraternity said they had passed a policy wherein no fraternity event tshirts were permitted to be given to a girl unless she had given that frat member at least a blow job. And this was subject to oversight.

[Anonymous]

The sorority houses where I went to college were pretty well-regulated (no parties, no drinking, etc. - girls generally lived in the house as a sophomore and maybe as a junior but that was it). Frats, on the other hand, in the time I was in college two were kicked off campus for poor behavior. I believe they were caught with cocaine at their parties and the university came down hard on them for it.

The houses themselves always seemed super unsafe. A few girls died as a result of a house fire at a sorority house. There were no working smoke detectors in the section of the house where they were staying.