Help me dress like a Bethesda mom

[Anonymous]

OP here. I'm sorry for inciting such a pity party on my behalf but I'm really a pretty normal person. I realize my OP sounded weird or immature in terms of fitting in; it was a failed attempt at sarcasm. Sort of at least.

Fwiw, there is literally no aspect of our life which is about keeping up with the Jones or conformity in general. But a lot of my stuff is outdated or ill fitting and I just want a few basics. As a couple of the PPs said, I don't have a lot of time or mental energy to invest in scoping various alternatives. With kids, a job, a house and cross-country moves, I have not thought much about fashion, especially winter fashion, for at least a decade, probably closer to 15 years. And everyone else seems to wear similar stuff, so I figure that's the easiest way to go.

I don't intend to buy a $500 handbag to impress my neighbors and I do draw the line at wearing giant overpriced bug-eyed sunglasses that also seems to be quite common here. But a good quality, middle-aged-mom appropriate non-work coat and bag and boots are must haves at this point, as well as any other ideas for an inadvertently dumpy looking DCUM. There have been a bunch of practical responses in this thread - please keep them coming! Thanks to all!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, it has to be North Face, sorry.

This is true. Otherwise, you'll be made fun of.

No. The North Face is so out, but they don't know it yet. Try Arc'teryx, Bogner-Fire+Ice or Canada Goose

[Anonymous]

OP, a couple pair of nice fitting, dark wash jeans will go a long way . Don't skimp, make sure they fit your Body type well and wear them when you would normally wear sweatpants or yoga pants .

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, it has to be North Face, sorry.

This is true. Otherwise, you'll be made fun of.

No. The North Face is so out, but they don't know it yet. Try Arc'teryx, Bogner-Fire+Ice or Canada Goose

This is pathetic. Really? I just went looking for a winter coat recently and felt like a sell out for buying NF, even though it was the only one I liked. No way I'd jump to the latest trend because you say it's cool. You know what sucks - Uggs. I refuse to buy those yet plenty of adults wear them and I'd consider them a kids brand. So, bottom line, don't look for the brand. Get the coat you like!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can anybody post a link to this black North Face puffer coat? My curiosity is killing me.

http://www.thenorthface.com/catalog/sc-gear/womens-jackets-vests-lifestyle/women-8217-s-miss-metro-parka.html?variationId=N2M&variationName=DAPPLE%20GREY#

My kids and I play a game where we count how many of these we see in one day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, it has to be North Face, sorry.

This is true. Otherwise, you'll be made fun of.

No. The North Face is so out, but they don't know it yet. Try Arc'teryx, Bogner-Fire+Ice or Canada Goose

For skiing yes, but for wearing around town it looks silly, unless the town is Vail. I have a Kjus ski jacket but I use that for skiing. I love shopping at Gorsuch (which sells all those brands) but you've got to know when to wear ski clothes and when to wear town clothes.

[Anonymous]

Bethesda dad here. I never notice brands or styles. If you want to look less frumpy, wear clothes that fit well for your body type, and put on some makeup.

And if you have a nice body, no man will complain if you wear yoga pants.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can anybody post a link to this black North Face puffer coat? My curiosity is killing me.

http://www.thenorthface.com/catalog/sc-gear/womens-jackets-vests-lifestyle/women-8217-s-miss-metro-parka.html?variationId=N2M&variationName=DAPPLE%20GREY#

It's ugly but functional. We try to see how many we can count in one day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, it has to be North Face, sorry.

This is true. Otherwise, you'll be made fun of.

Go to Macy's or another department store with a style consultant and let them help you find your own style. Who's cares what other people are wearing? Find the stuff that makes you look good and embrace it. Don't be a Stepford wife!

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Bethesda dad here. I never notice brands or styles. If you want to look less frumpy, wear clothes that fit well for your body type, and put on some makeup.

And if you have a nice body, no man will complain if you wear yoga pants.

Another dad here. Yoga pants are awesome.

If you're attractive, wear less makeup.

[Anonymous]

Longchamp bags are super comfortable and fairly durable. Invest in the North Face jacket- it's not that expensive when you break down the number of times you'll be wearing it and the sense of confidence/social assurance you will get. I personally find Bethesda style to be boring as hell but I will give you the rundown of what I would wear were I trying to come off as epitome of Bethesda mom:
Straight legs jeans, tapering in at the ankle (Bethesda moms are very no nonsense so flared, super skinny, or other interesting styles will not fit in.) You can find great jeans like this at JCrew or Urban Outfitters has a reasonably priced line that fit like Sevens.

A couple of button down shirts. (These can be rotated out, and bought for relatively inexpensively. Obviously Ralph Lauren and Brooks Brothers makes the best button downs but you dont HAVE to get those brands- you can get inexpensive versions that will pass the once-over from all kinds of TJMaxx types shops)
Sweaters: for winter, nothing is chicer than a very simple pull over in a neutral color like navy blue, black, or tan.
A good pair of boots to run around in- should come to about the knee, give or take some inches, in a good leather. These you will want to spend at least $200 on, maybe a smudge cheaper if you go to DSW or find them on sale. No one likes imitation leather.
Pair of flats to rotate out- JCrew makes fab italian leather simple flats in a variety of vibrant colors, for about $100. Or if you are cool spending a bit more, Stubbs and Wooten is a preppy stable that lately has been branching out into more modern. fun designs.
Longchamp, or a big Louis Vuitton tote.

All of these (with the exception of the LV and Stubbs & Wooten) are very reasonably priced options in my opinion. Nowadays, spending hundreds on clothes is reasonable. I subscribe to the French idea that dressing well is a form of politeness, and I always try to look put-together and respectful to whatever area or occasion I attending.

With that being said, this ^list is probably more Chevy Chase mom than Bethesda mom, but in my opinion Bethesda moms usually dress like frumps, like they raided the casuals section at Chico's, so I would never want anyone to dress like one.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, it has to be North Face, sorry.

This is true. Otherwise, you'll be made fun of.

No. The North Face is so out, but they don't know it yet. Try Arc'teryx, Bogner-Fire+Ice or Canada Goose

We're talking about the DC area here- fashion trends need to be on a 5 year time lapse from other major cities. Sad but true! North Face is still in here, and I'm guessing it will be for a while. Sad consequence of a city full of policy wonks is you lose all fashion sense...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, it has to be North Face, sorry.

I don't understand why everyone feels the need to wear skiing/mountaineering coats on weekends. Your regular wool coats work on Saturday too. Are you going to ascend K2 between the run to safeway and picking up the kids at soccer?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can anybody post a link to this black North Face puffer coat? My curiosity is killing me.

http://www.thenorthface.com/catalog/sc-gear/womens-jackets-vests-lifestyle/women-8217-s-miss-metro-parka.html?variationId=N2M&variationName=DAPPLE%20GREY#

It's ugly but functional. We try to see how many we can count in one day.

It doesn't even get that cold here! My sister wears one of these for her walking commute in Boston during "cold" days, meaning most of the time not. This is so odd.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Bethesda dad here. I never notice brands or styles. If you want to look less frumpy, wear clothes that fit well for your body type, and put on some makeup.

And if you have a nice body, no man will complain if you wear yoga pants.

Another dad here. Yoga pants are awesome.

If you're attractive, wear less makeup.

Silly men, women dress to impress other women not men