Should I file for a protective order

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I remember you from another post. Get out now. Yes, get a restraining order. what are you waiting for?

I think I do, too. But I seem to remember the same sort of "I was just talking to a woman, and wifey went 100% crazy for NO reason" 0% responsibility, too.

OP, I doubt this is the whole truth. But if your story has some reality in it, call the police. That's what people who've been assaulted should do.

Just know that, unlike DCUM, the police will get BOTH sides of the story.

Nice victim blaming. If the genders were reversed...

If the genders were reversed, I would still be incredibly suspicious of a story about sweet innocent Belle and the evil, horrible Beast.

And I would give the same advice: If you've been assaulted, call the police. It's sound advice for any gender.

Are you out of your mind? The police will get BOTH sides of the story and say, "Hey, you were flirting with another woman. Sounds like you deserve what you got." Really PP?????!!!!

OK. I understand. It's OK for men to beat the tar out of their wives if they appear to be flirting with other men, right? Wasn't there an MMA star who recent did this? I guess that's OK.

No, it's not OK for anyone. The post immediately above yours was sarcasm. It is not OK, no matter what the other person did or said.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

When it comes to posts about domestic violence, whether the individual poster is real or not is irrelevant - give the advice as if the person were really having this problem because I guarantee that other people who are in similar situations are reading and absorbing the advice (and victim blaming) too.

If you have been assaulted, call the police.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I reported domestic violence to the police yesterday, going to file for a protective order today. The police were more helpful than anticipated. They'll point you in the right direction.

Are you a man?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I remember you from another post. Get out now. Yes, get a restraining order. what are you waiting for?

I think I do, too. But I seem to remember the same sort of "I was just talking to a woman, and wifey went 100% crazy for NO reason" 0% responsibility, too.

OP, I doubt this is the whole truth. But if your story has some reality in it, call the police. That's what people who've been assaulted should do.

Just know that, unlike DCUM, the police will get BOTH sides of the story.

Doesn't matter. If he was hit, bitten, and clothing was torn, the reason does NOT matter. It doesn't matter if he's a man, a woman, if he had an affair, if she walked in on him sleeping with someone else, this is not okay.

He mentions children in the OP, which makes it even worse. It is hard and complicated, thus why many battered women stay with abusive men. It isn't always about money either, sometimes its hard to believe that you're actually in the situation and forming an "exit" plan is scary and takes support.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I remember you from another post. Get out now. Yes, get a restraining order. what are you waiting for?

I think I do, too. But I seem to remember the same sort of "I was just talking to a woman, and wifey went 100% crazy for NO reason" 0% responsibility, too.

OP, I doubt this is the whole truth. But if your story has some reality in it, call the police. That's what people who've been assaulted should do.

Just know that, unlike DCUM, the police will get BOTH sides of the story.

Doesn't matter. If he was hit, bitten, and clothing was torn, the reason does NOT matter. It doesn't matter if he's a man, a woman, if he had an affair, if she walked in on him sleeping with someone else, this is not okay.

He mentions children in the OP, which makes it even worse. It is hard and complicated, thus why many battered women stay with abusive men. It isn't always about money either, sometimes its hard to believe that you're actually in the situation and forming an "exit" plan is scary and takes support.

And sometimes people lie on anonymous internet forums for attention. There's no point in discussing this further. OP has been given sound advice (call the police, and a domestic abuse hotline).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I remember you from another post. Get out now. Yes, get a restraining order. what are you waiting for?

I think I do, too. But I seem to remember the same sort of "I was just talking to a woman, and wifey went 100% crazy for NO reason" 0% responsibility, too.

OP, I doubt this is the whole truth. But if your story has some reality in it, call the police. That's what people who've been assaulted should do.

Just know that, unlike DCUM, the police will get BOTH sides of the story.

Doesn't matter. If he was hit, bitten, and clothing was torn, the reason does NOT matter. It doesn't matter if he's a man, a woman, if he had an affair, if she walked in on him sleeping with someone else, this is not okay.

He mentions children in the OP, which makes it even worse. It is hard and complicated, thus why many battered women stay with abusive men. It isn't always about money either, sometimes its hard to believe that you're actually in the situation and forming an "exit" plan is scary and takes support.

And sometimes people lie on anonymous internet forums for attention. There's no point in discussing this further. OP has been given sound advice (call the police, and a domestic abuse hotline).

People do lie, that isn't being "discussed", but what is being, apparently, debated, is whether or not a victim of abuse is responsible for the abuse! No one admits to blatantly having this attitude, but asking for "both sides of the story" or doubting the OP is teling "the whole truth" IS actually worth discussing. I do not know if this is because OP is a man and people can't believe a woman can be abusive, or if people are just so dense that they don't believe abusive people explode for no reason, but I don't think any of this is irrelevant or not worthy of disucssion. If you are done, no worries, stop reading, the thread will eventually die on its own.

[Anonymous]

LOL at the unconscious male friend/victim of domestic abuse... nice try, jerk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:LOL at the unconscious male friend/victim of domestic abuse... nice try, jerk.

So you find violence funny. That sounds healthy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
People do lie, that isn't being "discussed", but what is being, apparently, debated, is whether or not a victim of abuse is responsible for the abuse! No one admits to blatantly having this attitude, but asking for "both sides of the story" or doubting the OP is teling "the whole truth" IS actually worth discussing. I do not know if this is because OP is a man and people can't believe a woman can be abusive, or if people are just so dense that they don't believe abusive people explode for no reason, but I don't think any of this is irrelevant or not worthy of disucssion. If you are done, no worries, stop reading, the thread will eventually die on its own.

I have zero proof that OP is, in fact, a man. I have a very lopsided story that seems to match previous lopsided stories, and a healthy sense of skepticism when it comes to things I read on the internet, especially when posted anonymously.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:LOL at the unconscious male friend/victim of domestic abuse... nice try, jerk.

So you find violence funny. That sounds healthy.

Not at all, I find the convenient "oh but I have a friend this happened to!" part of the comment funny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:And calling the police is still sound advice.

It's excellent advice.

Even the day later can still be very effective if there is bruising. People worry about injuries fading, but if anything they may be more noticeable in 24 hours. I am a mixed race woman and sometimes my bruises (not from DV) aren't visible on the day they occur, but bloom very dark the next day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:And calling the police is still sound advice.

It's excellent advice.

Even the day later can still be very effective if there is bruising. People worry about injuries fading, but if anything they may be more noticeable in 24 hours. I am a mixed race woman and sometimes my bruises (not from DV) aren't visible on the day they occur, but bloom very dark the next day.

A bite that drew blood would also be visible the next day.

[Anonymous]

liamw wrote:Run like the wind, or seek a court order to have her committed and try to get her some help.

Very hard these days. I tried to get my XH committed when he had a psychotic episode and all I could get was a TRO. I had just given birth.

[Anonymous]

liamw wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

liamw wrote:Run like the wind, or seek a court order to have her committed and try to get her some help.

Very hard these days. I tried to get my XH committed when he had a psychotic episode and all I could get was a TRO. I had just given birth.

That's sad, we talk about all the advances were making socially and when people actually NEED help they cant get it :-\

Yes, the changes were meant well according to some who argue that commitments to horrible hospitals were abusive. Others argue it was Reaganomics trying to save money on state mental facilities which were overwhelmed. All I know is that my XH still needs help and now I have to worry about our minor child when she's in his care.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I reported domestic violence to the police yesterday, going to file for a protective order today. The police were more helpful than anticipated. They'll point you in the right direction.

Are you a man?

No. Was I supposed to offer different advice because OP and I are different genders?