Help me justify to the owner a land swap

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here- glad you are all so amused. My last post here if I don't get serious responses. We would potentially agree to buy each other's land - our house is new- theirs is 60 years old. We want for them to buy our house (which is very high end and they like) and we do an even swap on our land, can anyone provide a real constructive idea of reason why we would want to sell vs build new.

That would be because your first post was one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever read. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this forum is now dumber for having read it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul...

Now, this second post of your is beginning to make some half-baked sense. What you are proposing is:

Offer your neighbor to buy your house at say, $1M, agreeing that the land is worth $500K and the home is worth $500K
But since their house is a tear down, you want them to value their house at $0
They give you a check for $500K, and you trade houses. They get a nice new house, you get land to build right?

Why not just tell them that you want to build a bigger house than the one you already have? Why even tell them you are interested in doing something similar?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What's on their land that is so valuable?

bubblin crude. Oil that is, black gold, Texas tea

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What's on their land that is so valuable?

bubblin crude. Oil that is, black gold, Texas tea

Kuwaiti coffee, Saudi sewage, Venezuelan varnish?

[Anonymous]

Omg. I have tears I am laughing so hard. Thanks DCUM!

[Anonymous]

This is hurting my head but you need to figure out the possible tax ramifications this may have.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What's on their land that is so valuable?

bubblin crude. Oil that is, black gold, Texas tea

Kuwaiti coffee, Saudi sewage, Venezuelan varnish?

I think OP murdered someone and while trying to bury the body at night accidentally buried the body on the neighbor's property. She has now hatched this insane plan in the hopes of owning the property or if caught use the original post as evidence for a diminished capacity plea.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here- glad you are all so amused. My last post here if I don't get serious responses. We would potentially agree to buy each other's land - our house is new- theirs is 60 years old. We want for them to buy our house (which is very high end and they like) and we do an even swap on our land, can anyone provide a real constructive idea of reason why we would want to sell vs build new.

That would be because your first post was one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever read. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this forum is now dumber for having read it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul...

Now, this second post of your is beginning to make some half-baked sense. What you are proposing is:

Offer your neighbor to buy your house at say, $1M, agreeing that the land is worth $500K and the home is worth $500K
But since their house is a tear down, you want them to value their house at $0
They give you a check for $500K, and you trade houses. They get a nice new house, you get land to build right?

Why not just tell them that you want to build a bigger house than the one you already have? Why even tell them you are interested in doing something similar?

NP here. This is the closest I have come to OP's post.

OP, is this correct?

What do you prefer about their land?

I am curious.

Okay, the Beverly Hillbillies reference was pretty funny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What's on their land that is so valuable?

bubblin crude. Oil that is, black gold, Texas tea

Kuwaiti coffee, Saudi sewage, Venezuelan varnish?

I think OP murdered someone and while trying to bury the body at night accidentally buried the body on the neighbor's property. She has now hatched this insane plan in the hopes of owning the property or if caught use the original post as evidence for a diminished capacity plea.

[Anonymous]

It took me a long time and the entire thread to finally understand your question, OP. You want to do a house and land swap with your older neighbors and you want our help in "justifying" such a swap to them - that is, persuading them to do what you want to do.

But no one can answer you since you haven't given full information. Why do YOU want to do this land swap? You haven't explained this at all. It can't be because you want to do your neighbors a favor - no sane person would switch houses for that reason alone, and your neighbors will think the same thing. Explain clearly why you want to do this swap, then maybe people can help you. Because right now it sounds like a very unorthodox and possibly shady proposition. The fact that your neighbors are elderly has me even more wary. (And why would they want a 4,000 sf house anyway?)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here- glad you are all so amused. My last post here if I don't get serious responses. We would potentially agree to buy each other's land - our house is new- theirs is 60 years old. We want for them to buy our house (which is very high end and they like) and we do an even swap on our land, can anyone provide a real constructive idea of reason why we would want to sell vs build new.

I think I finally understand what OP is asking, and why s/he is doing it in such an unclear, maybe intentionally evasive way. Re-reading this thread, OP, I can't help noticing that you never mention buying the neighbors' house - only that you want them to buy yours, and you want to come out even on the land. (Plus you make a lots of derogatory comments about how crappy their house is and how it's only good for demolition, and that they allegedly agree to this opinion of yours.)

OP, as you've phrased things so far, you sound like you want to sell them your house at top dollar in this "crazy" market, but get theirs for free because you consider it worthless. And you want us to help you convince them that you're doing them a favor (by "saving them the trouble" of renovating their home). Am I correct? (Your phrasing leaves a lot of room for confusion, so I could be wrong - disregard me if I am.)

If I'm right so far, and if you are actually trying to get DCUM's help in persuading this elderly couple to give you their house for free in order to save you hundreds of thousands of dollars on buying a teardown through the normal channels (in which you actually have to pay for the house AND the land) - forget it. That is the most lopsided, ridiculous, and one-sided deal I have ever heard of. A 60-year-old house isn't ancient, and isn't necessarily a tear-down. And it has real value on the market, which you seem to be trying to avoid by with this little neighbor-to-neighbor "swap" (where you and only you come out way, way ahead).

Again, IF this is what you're suggesting, no wonder your first post was so incoherent - it's such a breathtakingly arrogant idea and such a blatantly bad deal for your neighbors that you didn't WANT to be clear. And we're supposed to help you "justify" this? Way to try to take advantage of your elderly neighbors. I hope their families and other parties get wind of what you're trying to talk them into.

Final thing: if I've misunderstood you, and you do plan to pay market for their house and land, your post still makes no sense. Why do you need other people's help explaining to your neighbors why you want to switch properties with them? None of us can figure it out - can you?

[Anonymous]

This thread is incredibly hilarious!! Definitely in the top crazy original posts!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here- glad you are all so amused. My last post here if I don't get serious responses. We would potentially agree to buy each other's land - our house is new- theirs is 60 years old. We want for them to buy our house (which is very high end and they like) and we do an even swap on our land, can anyone provide a real constructive idea of reason why we would want to sell vs build new.

I think I finally understand what OP is asking, and why s/he is doing it in such an unclear, maybe intentionally evasive way. Re-reading this thread, OP, I can't help noticing that you never mention buying the neighbors' house - only that you want them to buy yours, and you want to come out even on the land. (Plus you make a lots of derogatory comments about how crappy their house is and how it's only good for demolition, and that they allegedly agree to this opinion of yours.)

OP, as you've phrased things so far, you sound like you want to sell them your house at top dollar in this "crazy" market, but get theirs for free because you consider it worthless. And you want us to help you convince them that you're doing them a favor (by "saving them the trouble" of renovating their home). Am I correct? (Your phrasing leaves a lot of room for confusion, so I could be wrong - disregard me if I am.)

If I'm right so far, and if you are actually trying to get DCUM's help in persuading this elderly couple to give you their house for free in order to save you hundreds of thousands of dollars on buying a teardown through the normal channels (in which you actually have to pay for the house AND the land) - forget it. That is the most lopsided, ridiculous, and one-sided deal I have ever heard of. A 60-year-old house isn't ancient, and isn't necessarily a tear-down. And it has real value on the market, which you seem to be trying to avoid by with this little neighbor-to-neighbor "swap" (where you and only you come out way, way ahead).

Again, IF this is what you're suggesting, no wonder your first post was so incoherent - it's such a breathtakingly arrogant idea and such a blatantly bad deal for your neighbors that you didn't WANT to be clear. And we're supposed to help you "justify" this? Way to try to take advantage of your elderly neighbors. I hope their families and other parties get wind of what you're trying to talk them into.

Final thing: if I've misunderstood you, and you do plan to pay market for their house and land, your post still makes no sense. Why do you need other people's help explaining to your neighbors why you want to switch properties with them? None of us can figure it out - can you?

+1000 Thank you for breaking it down! Hopefully OP can process this logic, but I doubt it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here- glad you are all so amused. My last post here if I don't get serious responses. We would potentially agree to buy each other's land - our house is new- theirs is 60 years old. We want for them to buy our house (which is very high end and they like) and we do an even swap on our land, can anyone provide a real constructive idea of reason why we would want to sell vs build new.

I think I finally understand what OP is asking, and why s/he is doing it in such an unclear, maybe intentionally evasive way. Re-reading this thread, OP, I can't help noticing that you never mention buying the neighbors' house - only that you want them to buy yours, and you want to come out even on the land. (Plus you make a lots of derogatory comments about how crappy their house is and how it's only good for demolition, and that they allegedly agree to this opinion of yours.)

OP, as you've phrased things so far, you sound like you want to sell them your house at top dollar in this "crazy" market, but get theirs for free because you consider it worthless. And you want us to help you convince them that you're doing them a favor (by "saving them the trouble" of renovating their home). Am I correct? (Your phrasing leaves a lot of room for confusion, so I could be wrong - disregard me if I am.)

If I'm right so far, and if you are actually trying to get DCUM's help in persuading this elderly couple to give you their house for free in order to save you hundreds of thousands of dollars on buying a teardown through the normal channels (in which you actually have to pay for the house AND the land) - forget it. That is the most lopsided, ridiculous, and one-sided deal I have ever heard of. A 60-year-old house isn't ancient, and isn't necessarily a tear-down. And it has real value on the market, which you seem to be trying to avoid by with this little neighbor-to-neighbor "swap" (where you and only you come out way, way ahead).

Again, IF this is what you're suggesting, no wonder your first post was so incoherent - it's such a breathtakingly arrogant idea and such a blatantly bad deal for your neighbors that you didn't WANT to be clear. And we're supposed to help you "justify" this? Way to try to take advantage of your elderly neighbors. I hope their families and other parties get wind of what you're trying to talk them into.

Final thing: if I've misunderstood you, and you do plan to pay market for their house and land, your post still makes no sense. Why do you need other people's help explaining to your neighbors why you want to switch properties with them? None of us can figure it out - can you?

I think this post hits the nail on the head. For shame Op.

[Anonymous]

OP,

http://i.imgur.com/CA7MvnH.gif