Sister in law question
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
|
No, I would be happy I didn't get asked. I could pick out my own dress and have a blast!!!
|
Anonymous
No, I'd be glad to not have to spend the $$ and buy the ugly dress and attend rehearsals/etc. If you're not in the wedding it's more fun 
|
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
Amen. I was a Bridemaid for one of my sisters and one friend. I had DD 2 weeks before other sister's wedding, she asked a friend, which was fine by me. When your friends first start getting married, being in a the wedding is a big deal. But then you quickly figure out that all it is a big $$$$ and just being a guest is great. |
Anonymous
|
Most of the weddings I attend don't have official bridesmaids. Is your SIL even having bridesmaids? You give no details but if it's a small wedding, it's very possible that you SIL has no braidsmaids or will limit it to only her best friend & her sister.
My best friend since elementary school sang at my wedding and we gave her a very special role but there was no title to go with it. We had like 35 people at the whole thing - every one there was either family or a best friend so if we started designating titles, every one except my least favorite aunt and cousins would have had one. |
Anonymous
| Yes, they are having a wedding party. She is having 4 bridesmaids, he 4 groomsmen. He has sisters, she didn't ask them either. He asked his sisters' son to be a ring bearer. He did not ask my husband to be in the wedding either. So no adult family members. |
Anonymous
Then no, would not be offended. |
Anonymous
| I'd be a bit sad and disappointed. You'll be in each other's lives a very long time and having you as a bridesmaid would indicate she knows that and would honor your relationship. I think that relationship should come before friendships. |
Anonymous
|
Not only was I not asked to be in my SIL's wedding, but she had been in mine just 6 months before AND when she was getting ready she invited her family and all the female friends into her hotel suite to be with her. As far as I know, I was literally the only woman in our age group not invited (it was a very small destination wedding, but we each had two non-SIL bridesmaids, so it wouldn't have been odd).
My husband to this day says "She was just trying to let you relax! She didn't mean anything." He does not get it. Sorry to hijack. I am bitter as hell, but try to be cool. |
Anonymous
|
I would be relieved but I think it says something about the relationship between the two of you.
I did not ask my future SIL because I didn't feel close to her and everything was drama with her. I really did not want to be considered part of her family and life. 20 years later I still don't have a relationship with her. |
Anonymous
| Nope. She can have whomever she's closest with. I didn't ask her to be in my wedding since I've seen her all of 3 times before I married her brother. |
Anonymous
Seems to me you started off on the wrong foot. Would it have hurt you to welcome her into the family, or were you threatened by her? A rhetorical question, of course. 
|
Anonymous
| Sounds like it's pretty symmetrical and consistent. And your kids are representing your nuclear family. You and DH get to wear whatever you want! Sounds like a nice time. Have fun and don't worry about random people's expectations on your behalf. |
Anonymous
|
Sounds like they didn't ask any family. In that case how could I possibly be offended?! Siblings-in-law are second string after siblings, unless there is a super-special relationship between the siblings-in-law.
I agree with PP who said she loves the role of reader. Me, too! You get to do something meaningful in the ceremony, you get to wear what you want, and you get to sit most of the ceremony. |
Anonymous
| Once a person is married - you're on the other side of the line. You're expected to be happy for the younger set. For them this pageantry is more novel |