Being left back in kindergarten.

[Anonymous]

OP
@22:30- I don't know. I'll find out though.
@22:27- probably should have done the same as you and maybe we will meet!

I was really hoping to here some thoughts from people who kept their child back and had a good experience doing so. Anyone out there????

We love the school. He loves school. Its a good fit. I really don't want to have to delve back into the DC lottery again!~!

[Anonymous]

Is this even an option in public? Switching schools for this reason?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP
@22:30- I don't know. I'll find out though.
@22:27- probably should have done the same as you and maybe we will meet!

I was really hoping to here some thoughts from people who kept their child back and had a good experience doing so. Anyone out there????

We love the school. He loves school. Its a good fit. I really don't want to have to delve back into the DC lottery again!~!

It really isn't all that common for kids to get held back, so I would imagine it will be tough to get information on others' experiences. But, just imagine how your child will feel if he can't keep up in subsequent years. It becomes a compound problem because it can get worse as the years go by to the point where he really fails. Then you may always wonder if you could have fixed it by holding him back.

I don't know your child so I can't tell if its the right thing. But just wanted to point out that there are two sides to the issue - whether it was successful to hold him back and whether it was a problem to decline this at the recommendation of the teacher/school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow. I think the teacher is WAY off base. If your kid is a bright kid, holding back for social skill development alone is ridiculous.

And my second grader probably doesn't know how to tie his shoes yet either. Velcro has gotten him this far. It apparently wasn't a barrier to entry to advanced elementary grades.

Agree you are just reinforcing he isn't capable instead of building his confidence. It will make him even more hesitant to try something he views as hard or is afraid to fail at...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:A child at our school was held back. The problem is all the 1st graders know. And talk about it. If it were my DC, I would switch schools.

Where did your six year old child learn to gossip??

You'd think huh? My 5 y.o. came back and told me X has a crush on Y and the class was chanting "kiss, kiss, kiss!!"

[Anonymous]

I talked with a mom at school who had her son held back. She regretted it. She said that the issues he had before being held back were not resolved by repeating K. She said they eventually had a neuropsych exam, and got a diagnosis for him. Then an IEP was put in place, and special services were provided. This is when he finally came into his own, and he did much better in school.

I wonder in your case if this would be similar. Perhaps you could meet with a developmental pediatrician about your teacher's concerns before deciding to hold him back.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here, the teacher says:
he knows his letters and letter sounds
he can read small words
he can count pass 100
he knows his numbers
he can add two groups of objects again
he loves show and tell
he has an impressive vocabularly
he is highly imaginative
he knows how to button, zipper and cut, but can not close a snap or tie his shoes

he doesn't like to participate in morning circle when they count the days of the school year aloud. He tends to zone off (highly imaginative) or situate himself near a container of toys so that he can touch them during the circle time.
He has good behavior otherwise, is not disruptive and does not fight.
she has noticed that he take things VERY seriously and seems upset when the older kids understand concepts faster than he does (but she says he always right behind the quick learners in his understanding)

she thinks keeping him back will do wonders for his confidence and willingness to try new things (he tends to say No, when asked to do something that might be hard)

OP- this sounds just like my kid, only he's 4 right now and all his pals are turning 5 in pre-K. We're considering an early start to K, but don't think he's ready socially yet. We have the same issues with my kid being distracted and not participating well. We're leaning towards doing pre-K again, or doing K twice (in two different school)...

[Anonymous]

OP, do you think your kid is bright? Consider IQ testing. Really. If you find out your kids is significantly above average, then think about the implications of having your very smart kid be the oldest in a room full of more average kids. It compounds the problem.

[Anonymous]

OP, it really doesn't sound like the issues your teacher mentions warrant repeating the entire grade. I'd see about getting the guidance counselor and administration in on the conversation. I think your kid would be really, really bored next year considering how much he already knows about letters, numbers, etc.

[Anonymous]

At my son's ES (parochial), there were 10 children held back from K last year. Only one family left for a new school.

[Anonymous]

My friend's son is repeating K this year, but in a different school. He did K in a private school which only went up to K, and then they moved him to a different private school where the teachers, after an evaluation, suggested he repeat K. So far they are very happy with the decision. Her son is very smart, he is probably more advanced than my own DD who is in public school 1st grade. They thought it would be a confidence booster. His birthday is in July.

[Anonymous]

Is it really that rare in public school? At our FCPS, I know of at least 2 kids in DS's grade (out of about 65) who were held back in K.

[Anonymous]

My brother was held back in K but that was back when half-day K was prevalent. He wasn't able to sit still and concentrate long enough to move on to 1st grade. It worked out well for him. In the second year of K, my mother worked with the teacher to give him extra work to keep him from getting bored and misbehaving.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here, the teacher says:
he knows his letters and letter sounds
he can read small words
he can count pass 100
he knows his numbers
he can add two groups of objects again
he loves show and tell
he has an impressive vocabularly
he is highly imaginative
he knows how to button, zipper and cut, but can not close a snap or tie his shoes

he doesn't like to participate in morning circle when they count the days of the school year aloud. He tends to zone off (highly imaginative) or situate himself near a container of toys so that he can touch them during the circle time.
He has good behavior otherwise, is not disruptive and does not fight.
she has noticed that he take things VERY seriously and seems upset when the older kids understand concepts faster than he does (but she says he always right behind the quick learners in his understanding)

she thinks keeping him back will do wonders for his confidence and willingness to try new things (he tends to say No, when asked to do something that might be hard)

OP, ask for a 2nd opinion. You are describing my child to the T. He was never asked to repeat a great even though he's a daydreamer and zones out.

[Anonymous]

I failed second grade I never changed schools. My parents were a little embarrassed or ashamed of me and would say I was held back. But I owned it and to this day have no problem saying I failed. No one ever made fun of me. Graduating from high school at 19 was a little awkward. I was so ready by then to be done with high school. I felt too old.