Redshirting - why?

[Anonymous]

The only people who should have any sway in your decision process are you, your husband, the child's doctor, and of course any daycare/preschool teachers he currently works with. If all of those professionals say he's ready, then send him.

I'm the mother of two boys. Both are reasonably young for their classes (late May and late June birthdays) but sent both to school "on time." Not because I'm anti-redshirting, but because by all accounts they were ready to go.

There are lots of academic articles out there that weigh the pros and cons of red-shirting from social and academic standpoints. However, by almost all accounts, they say any "advantage" red-shirted children have evens out after just a few years.

Do what is right for you and your child. Not what relatives think you should do.

[Anonymous]

Its a hard decision. I think your relatives are just pointing out that its worth considering. I have a young kindergartner now. Its hard being the youngest. The other kids pick up on that and the youngest one seems to be the first one picked on. My son is doing ok in K but it is truly hard for him to sit and work all day. We are in MCPS and there a lot o sitting on the carpet and sitting at a table working. There is not much play time at all. The attention span is just that much harder for my 5 year old than the older kids.

[Anonymous]

Kids rise to the occasion. I choose not to redshirt (although I understand and don't oppose those who do) because I believe my child would adjust.

[Anonymous]

Lots of studies say having redshirted kids in classes changes teacher and administrator expectations and evaluations of classmates. That is why the discussion rightfully involves everyone not just the teachers and parents of the prospective redshirts. To the extent you choose to focus on impacts to others as well as own interests, this can provide a way to justify not redshirting when it is a clise call or you just need some words to say in response to family pushingvfor domething you dont favor.

[Anonymous]

Thanks everyone. OP here. I haven't read anything here that has given me any pause for thought on the issue. My son only just turned 4 but he's already ready for kindergarten. He's in an amazing DC charter school that is fairly structured, and I'm pretty sure similar to most kindergarten classes. It's not like he's just hanging out at home or doesn't know how to behave at school. (He's a smart kid, but his greatest strength is his level of attentiveness and enrapt attention which translates into soaking up everything around him and learning very fast).

I just don't understand the "gift of time" comment. Would it be a "gift" for him to repeat Pre-K? He's already ahead of all his peers and gets extra individual instruction while they wait for the others to catch up. How could that be a gift? He'd just be bored.

The only hesitation I have really had has been whether by middle school he might seem younger than his peers, or if puberty hits late he'd be bullied when he's older. It seems to hard to tell though. Any thoughts on this aspect? is it really likely to change a few years down the line?

[Anonymous]

OP - it sounds like he will be fine. Remember that kids in one grade normally have a 12 month spread of birthdays. So even with no redshirting - someone could be 12 months younger or older than someone else. It has always been this way and I think the majority do just fine.

[Anonymous]

OP, middle school and puberty are such an uncertain mess under any circumstances. I definitely wouldn't base any decision about kindergarten now on what might or might not happen in middle school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Thanks everyone. OP here. I haven't read anything here that has given me any pause for thought on the issue. My son only just turned 4 but he's already ready for kindergarten. He's in an amazing DC charter school that is fairly structured, and I'm pretty sure similar to most kindergarten classes. It's not like he's just hanging out at home or doesn't know how to behave at school. (He's a smart kid, but his greatest strength is his level of attentiveness and enrapt attention which translates into soaking up everything around him and learning very fast).

I just don't understand the "gift of time" comment. Would it be a "gift" for him to repeat Pre-K? He's already ahead of all his peers and gets extra individual instruction while they wait for the others to catch up. How could that be a gift? He'd just be bored.

The only hesitation I have really had has been whether by middle school he might seem younger than his peers, or if puberty hits late he'd be bullied when he's older. It seems to hard to tell though. Any thoughts on this aspect? is it really likely to change a few years down the line?

We have a DD in Kindergarten right now who is the youngest in the class. She actually just came to that conclusion. Kids talk about this stuff, and she came home upset about when her birthday falls in the year.

We seriously contemplated redshirting her--but, I can tell from your post that I quoted that our values are different. I get anxious about DD's fleeting childhood. I see no need to rush just because she is advanced. I will try to share what we were feeling.

DD started reading and doing math at 3 years old, so she was never really going to learn that stuff in preschool. Because she was so far ahead we chose a part time option with no academics for preschool and preK. It worked out great. By the time she graduated preK she was even further ahead having had no instruction. Traditional kindergarten would not have been a good fit. We considered switching schools and letting her repeat preK with them to give her that same environment where she could just focus on social stuff and play. But, in meeting with the new school (the one we really wanted to end up in) they advised us that their Kindergarten would be perfect because they were pretty strict about redshirting, used evidence based approaches in kindergarten (i.e. lots of play) and did not focus on reading--they focus more on expression and experience. It basically felt a lot like preschool. We were sold.

Now, I still second guess myself. In these early years 12 months is a huge age difference. It is definitely noticed. She is not a leader in the classroom despite being so academically ahead. She is less mature than the older girls. She is less confident. There is no doubt in my mind it would be a different dynamic in the preK room. I also love this program and will be sad when she moves up to first grade next year. I would repeat the kindergarten program in a heartbeat if it were not for all her friends moving into first. It is just an amazing program. We are thankful that it is a school that will differentiate for DD in first.

So, in the end we did not redshirt, and we are mostly happy with our choice. It helped that we have a school that is pretty strict about redshirting and strives for an age diverse (within that year) classroom. It also helped that we chose a very nurturing environment that did not needlessly push down academics. But, like I said we might have difference points of view on the subject. My child is academically advanced, and I feel that as long as she is happy leave it be. Furthermore, her being academically advanced is blessing that affords her more play time and fun. She does not get bored in a developmentally appropriate environment. You sound like you are more concerned with him being in a class at his academic level. In some cases that is just impossible and it is best to look for a good social fit and let the child continue what they are doing on their own.

That is my feeling. My short answer is your DS sounds fine in the grade he is in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thanks everyone. OP here. I haven't read anything here that has given me any pause for thought on the issue. My son only just turned 4 but he's already ready for kindergarten. He's in an amazing DC charter school that is fairly structured, and I'm pretty sure similar to most kindergarten classes. It's not like he's just hanging out at home or doesn't know how to behave at school. (He's a smart kid, but his greatest strength is his level of attentiveness and enrapt attention which translates into soaking up everything around him and learning very fast).

I just don't understand the "gift of time" comment. Would it be a "gift" for him to repeat Pre-K? He's already ahead of all his peers and gets extra individual instruction while they wait for the others to catch up. How could that be a gift? He'd just be bored.

The only hesitation I have really had has been whether by middle school he might seem younger than his peers, or if puberty hits late he'd be bullied when he's older. It seems to hard to tell though. Any thoughts on this aspect? is it really likely to change a few years down the line?

We have a DD in Kindergarten right now who is the youngest in the class. She actually just came to that conclusion. Kids talk about this stuff, and she came home upset about when her birthday falls in the year.

We seriously contemplated redshirting her--but, I can tell from your post that I quoted that our values are different. I get anxious about DD's fleeting childhood. I see no need to rush just because she is advanced. I will try to share what we were feeling.

DD started reading and doing math at 3 years old, so she was never really going to learn that stuff in preschool. Because she was so far ahead we chose a part time option with no academics for preschool and preK. It worked out great. By the time she graduated preK she was even further ahead having had no instruction. Traditional kindergarten would not have been a good fit. We considered switching schools and letting her repeat preK with them to give her that same environment where she could just focus on social stuff and play. But, in meeting with the new school (the one we really wanted to end up in) they advised us that their Kindergarten would be perfect because they were pretty strict about redshirting, used evidence based approaches in kindergarten (i.e. lots of play) and did not focus on reading--they focus more on expression and experience. It basically felt a lot like preschool. We were sold.

Now, I still second guess myself. In these early years 12 months is a huge age difference. It is definitely noticed. She is not a leader in the classroom despite being so academically ahead. She is less mature than the older girls. She is less confident. There is no doubt in my mind it would be a different dynamic in the preK room. I also love this program and will be sad when she moves up to first grade next year. I would repeat the kindergarten program in a heartbeat if it were not for all her friends moving into first. It is just an amazing program. We are thankful that it is a school that will differentiate for DD in first.

So, in the end we did not redshirt, and we are mostly happy with our choice. It helped that we have a school that is pretty strict about redshirting and strives for an age diverse (within that year) classroom. It also helped that we chose a very nurturing environment that did not needlessly push down academics. But, like I said we might have difference points of view on the subject. My child is academically advanced, and I feel that as long as she is happy leave it be. Furthermore, her being academically advanced is blessing that affords her more play time and fun. She does not get bored in a developmentally appropriate environment. You sound like you are more concerned with him being in a class at his academic level. In some cases that is just impossible and it is best to look for a good social fit and let the child continue what they are doing on their own.

That is my feeling. My short answer is your DS sounds fine in the grade he is in.

Thanks for sharing your experience. Last year he was definitely identifiable as one of the younger ones, shy etc. It's no longer clear at all, in any way. I wouldn't describe him as a "leader" but he's definitely popular among his peers and has a lot of friends. I guess, for me, it has got down to, do I want him to be the oldest and always be significantly ahead of the curve academically and socially, or do I want him to be the youngest, constantly challenged and learning from kids slightly older then him? Of course, the obvious answer would be for him to be in the middle of the age range, but that's just not an option based on when his birthday is.

[Anonymous]

"Relatives pressuring"

This is the question which is most important. Why do yo feel pressured- why do you put yourself in a position where you feel pressured? Either you are asking for their opinion. You don't need to. Save yourself a lot of headaches in the future - discuss less.

[Anonymous]

I haven't read this whole thread but my take is that everyone wants to redshirt because they think it will give their child an advantage. In short, being older/bigger gives you an advantage over your peers that accumulates over time and builds confidence and therefore makes child more successful later in life. I think most of this notion comes from Malcolm Gladwell's book Outliers.

I also think it's total crap - just another way for hyper DC parents to try and give their kids a competitive advantage. FWIW, my DS is an August birthday and one of the youngest in his class. He's thriving - great feedback from teachers at conferences, loves school, lots of friends, no problems at all.

[Anonymous]

My SIL is pressuring us to hold back our August son. She's a middle school teacher, and says that in her experience, many young kids who did fine up until that point start to struggle more than average-age peers then. I'm pretty sure we're going to send him on time (despite being one of the youngest in preK he holds his own pretty well) but she's planted some seeds of doubt in my husband's mind.

The most persuasive argument for red-shirting to me is that kids are pushed into a highly structured, really academic day really early now, and I wouldn't mind a bit more time for my child to enjoy his childhood. As I said though, most likely we'll be sending my son on time.

[Anonymous]

Son is youngest in his class. He works hard to keep up. I think it's a good thing. I will not have to worry if he gets designated "gifted" or not. He is challenged.

^ I could have written this when he was in elementary school. He is in college now. He was not always in the most 'advanced' level for academics. He was successful, on varsity sports and elected school-wide for student council.

No regrets.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I haven't read this whole thread but my take is that everyone wants to redshirt because they think it will give their child an advantage. In short, being older/bigger gives you an advantage over your peers that accumulates over time and builds confidence and therefore makes child more successful later in life. I think most of this notion comes from Malcolm Gladwell's book Outliers.

I also think it's total crap - just another way for hyper DC parents to try and give their kids a competitive advantage. FWIW, my DS is an August birthday and one of the youngest in his class. He's thriving - great feedback from teachers at conferences, loves school, lots of friends, no problems at all.

My child waited a year due to developmental issues - I wasn't looking for an "advantage" for her. I was looking for her to be at the same level as everyone else (rather than behind). That said and she is still struggling a bit. But if you met her - you may not realize all of this and might judge us for holding her back. Her issues are not immediately obvious and a lot of them have resolved over time. I think its an individual decision and you can't generalize.

[Anonymous]

If your kid is motivated by challenge, don't redshirt. If your kid shuts down when things are tough, redshirt.