"Go kill yourself"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This post hits home for me because my HS DD has recently been the subject of bullying.

A girl, who has since moved away, told my daughter who was cutting herself to "cut herself deeper so she would cut herself and bleed out to death". The girl moved away, those type of threats diminished, so I didn't deal directly with that particular girl.

I recently took my daughter to a therapist, who basically asked me, why the FUCK didn't I do anything at the time.

My daughter seems to be dealing ok but - #1 loser parent here.

Not only do we (general we) set our kids loose with phones, Internet, computers...when things go wrong we say - gee, deal with it yourself, or *we* choose not to deal with it. I'm about to go let the wrath out on my DDs HS because this shit WILL stop.

Speak for yourself.

[Anonymous]

4:59, don't beat yourself up. My DD is only in 4th grade, and every year I ask myself did I do too much or too little when it comes to bullies. (She tends to be a target--some years I've tried to stay out of things; other years I've gone absolutely batshit crazy on parents--neither is the solution.) By HS I would imagine you're trying to let your DD cultivate some independent problem-solving skills, and good for you. Even if you should have stepped in sooner, you are doing so now, and that's what matters.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This post hits home for me because my HS DD has recently been the subject of bullying.

A girl, who has since moved away, told my daughter who was cutting herself to "cut herself deeper so she would cut herself and bleed out to death". The girl moved away, those type of threats diminished, so I didn't deal directly with that particular girl.

I recently took my daughter to a therapist, who basically asked me, why the FUCK didn't I do anything at the time.

My daughter seems to be dealing ok but - #1 loser parent here.

Not only do we (general we) set our kids loose with phones, Internet, computers...when things go wrong we say - gee, deal with it yourself, or *we* choose not to deal with it. I'm about to go let the wrath out on my DDs HS because this shit WILL stop.

I don't get this... How are people knowing that your daughter cuts herself? Don't want your shit out there to backfire on you, then keep it locked. Same with OP, how are people getting the number? Change the damn number and let it go. Bullies will remain. Stop trying to fix other people's behavior and perhaps fix your own. This is rude, I get that but seriously, you can't really change every teenagers mind frame.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This post hits home for me because my HS DD has recently been the subject of bullying.

A girl, who has since moved away, told my daughter who was cutting herself to "cut herself deeper so she would cut herself and bleed out to death". The girl moved away, those type of threats diminished, so I didn't deal directly with that particular girl.

I recently took my daughter to a therapist, who basically asked me, why the FUCK didn't I do anything at the time.

My daughter seems to be dealing ok but - #1 loser parent here.

Not only do we (general we) set our kids loose with phones, Internet, computers...when things go wrong we say - gee, deal with it yourself, or *we* choose not to deal with it. I'm about to go let the wrath out on my DDs HS because this shit WILL stop.

Speak for yourself.

WTF?

"#1 loser parent" seems overly generous to me.

But, hey the cuts were not that deep, not like you know, like they left any permanent scars or anything...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What the HELL is with teenagers.

What is all this "you should just go kill yourself" crap. I know kids are mean, but I swear I dont recall this kind of statement being said when I went to high school.
And it seems with all of the anti-bullying awareness of teen suicide lately, this kind of comment should be going away.

My daughter is being tortured at school by a group of boys--and this is the message she's getting. I'm stunned.

She went to the counselor, who talked to the boys. But still, she gets texts and phone calls during school.

Not posting to get advice on this issue with her-we are dealing with it.

But posting more to ask, does anyone remember in high school previous generations of kids telling eachother to kill themselves? I just dont remember anything of the sort.

I find it so disturbing. Seriously I think there is something wrong with these kids. Like, emotionally they are disturbed.

Anyway, regardless of what is wrong with them, they need a serious ass kicking.

True dat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This post hits home for me because my HS DD has recently been the subject of bullying.

A girl, who has since moved away, told my daughter who was cutting herself to "cut herself deeper so she would cut herself and bleed out to death". The girl moved away, those type of threats diminished, so I didn't deal directly with that particular girl.

I recently took my daughter to a therapist, who basically asked me, why the FUCK didn't I do anything at the time.

My daughter seems to be dealing ok but - #1 loser parent here.

Not only do we (general we) set our kids loose with phones, Internet, computers...when things go wrong we say - gee, deal with it yourself, or *we* choose not to deal with it. I'm about to go let the wrath out on my DDs HS because this shit WILL stop.

Speak for yourself.

WTF?

"#1 loser parent" seems overly generous to me.

But, hey the cuts were not that deep, not like you know, like they left any permanent scars or anything...

Back off with your self-righteousness. An estimated 15 to 20% of kids cut at some point. It is a much more common problem than you think. My DD did this during a tough phase and it was absolutely one of the most harrowing things I've gone through as a parent. We got her help and she's doing great now, but the last thing I needed was being judged. You have no idea what its like. Some kids who cut have obvious scars. Some don't -- and could be your child. Often these kids are high achievers, "good" kids. This PP is doing the right things and getting her DD help. Thank God her DD has her for a parent and not some of you.

And given the way some of you have responded on this thread its not obvious to everyone when there is bullying that requires some kind of intervention. I doubt you are perfect parents. In fact I know you aren't given your ignorance and self-righteousness. I sure hope for their sake your kids never have problems.

PP was being very honest about where she blew it. if you can't think of a time you made the wrong parenting decision, then you are lying to yourself.

[Anonymous]

Sheesh. Some of you are really playing with karma. When a kid commits suicide, do you hear the parents say, "Oh, we just knew this was going to happen?" No. It's usually the kids who were best at hiding their pain. Be careful with your flippant remarks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This post hits home for me because my HS DD has recently been the subject of bullying.

A girl, who has since moved away, told my daughter who was cutting herself to "cut herself deeper so she would cut herself and bleed out to death". The girl moved away, those type of threats diminished, so I didn't deal directly with that particular girl.

I recently took my daughter to a therapist, who basically asked me, why the FUCK didn't I do anything at the time.

My daughter seems to be dealing ok but - #1 loser parent here.

Not only do we (general we) set our kids loose with phones, Internet, computers...when things go wrong we say - gee, deal with it yourself, or *we* choose not to deal with it. I'm about to go let the wrath out on my DDs HS because this shit WILL stop.

+1000

[Anonymous]

In our middle school experience, there are kids who say this. I went to the guidance counselor and principal about this and the kids involved were called into the office. Their parents were contacted, and the behavior stopped. One child, in tears apparently, told the principal "I say that to my friends all the time, it doesn't mean anything"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In our middle school experience, there are kids who say this. I went to the guidance counselor and principal about this and the kids involved were called into the office. Their parents were contacted, and the behavior stopped. One child, in tears apparently, told the principal "I say that to my friends all the time, it doesn't mean anything"

Granted, you can't police everything that comes out of kids' mouths, but this is the sort of phrase that parents should strongly, strongly discourage. The fact that it's meaningless to this kid is kind of depressing.

[Anonymous]

OP here. We got everything to stop. A mix of school helping (they only help with in school issues, which Most of this was), plus
A bit of direct confronting of the kid by my husband and son (who had a Nice polite chat with the young men).
Over.

I am suprised so many people heard this stuff growing up.
I never did!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In our middle school experience, there are kids who say this. I went to the guidance counselor and principal about this and the kids involved were called into the office. Their parents were contacted, and the behavior stopped. One child, in tears apparently, told the principal "I say that to my friends all the time, it doesn't mean anything"

Granted, you can't police everything that comes out of kids' mouths, but this is the sort of phrase that parents should strongly, strongly discourage. The fact that it's meaningless to this kid is kind of depressing.

Well. It is not meaningless to her anymore. The intervention initiated by the bullied kid's parents by the guidance councilor and the principal worked. She will think twice before saying anything like that again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. We got everything to stop. A mix of school helping (they only help with in school issues, which Most of this was), plus
A bit of direct confronting of the kid by my husband and son (who had a Nice polite chat with the young men).
Over.

I am suprised so many people heard this stuff growing up.
I never did!

OP, so glad to hear everything worked out!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What the HELL is with teenagers.

What is all this "you should just go kill yourself" crap. I know kids are mean, but I swear I dont recall this kind of statement being said when I went to high school.
And it seems with all of the anti-bullying awareness of teen suicide lately, this kind of comment should be going away.

My daughter is being tortured at school by a group of boys--and this is the message she's getting. I'm stunned.

She went to the counselor, who talked to the boys. But still, she gets texts and phone calls during school.

Not posting to get advice on this issue with her-we are dealing with it.

But posting more to ask, does anyone remember in high school previous generations of kids telling eachother to kill themselves? I just dont remember anything of the sort.

I find it so disturbing. Seriously I think there is something wrong with these kids. Like, emotionally they are disturbed.

Anyway, regardless of what is wrong with them, they need a serious ass kicking.

Very disturbing. Not only is there something wrong with the kids, there is something wrong with the parents. My eldest used to ask me "who RAISES these types of kids?" I think he's onto something.

I'm glad you are dealing with it - be swift, be terrible. Leave no stone unturned. Tell your daughter that it's sick that these people are raised to think it's OK to say such horrid things. Tell her that college is MUCH different, as is life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Its not only that they are saying these terrible things but it also sounds like a bullying campaign. Please do not stop with the counselor. Go to the principal and on to the school system if necessary. This is not something your daughter should take on -- its not her job to deal with it or stop it. The adults have to step in. This is really, really bad.

Escalate to media level if necessary. Contact The Blaze.