What to do to friend who invited 2 "others" to our wedding without our permission?

[Anonymous]

Yes, this is typical in Filipino culture. Also some middle easterners do this.

[Anonymous]

Well you had already paid for it anyway so laugh it off. Send both couples a 1st anniversary announcement though.

[Anonymous]

With friends like that, op......

[Anonymous]

It's rude, but was your wedding ruined?

At our wedding, which was supposed to be "no kids", one of Dh's co-workers showed up with his 2 little girls.

I was a little surprised when I saw them, but honestly--they were very well behaved. I have no idea what happened with the seating, as the table the co-worker and his wife were assigned to was full...I'm sure the owner of my venue was just able to smooth it over so it didn't become my concern.

My mom told me later that the co-workers wife approached her, very embarrassed, apolgozing because she didn't realize that kids were not expected--of course my mom told her it was fine and complimented how well behaved the girls were, how pretty they looked in their nice dresses, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, this is typical in Filipino culture. Also some middle easterners do this.

And was the wedding in the Philippines or the Middle East?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's rude, but was your wedding ruined?

At our wedding, which was supposed to be "no kids", one of Dh's co-workers showed up with his 2 little girls.

I was a little surprised when I saw them, but honestly--they were very well behaved. I have no idea what happened with the seating, as the table the co-worker and his wife were assigned to was full...I'm sure the owner of my venue was just able to smooth it over so it didn't become my concern.

My mom told me later that the co-workers wife approached her, very embarrassed, apolgozing because she didn't realize that kids were not expected--of course my mom told her it was fine and complimented how well behaved the girls were, how pretty they looked in their nice dresses, etc.

So it sounds like you and your mother handled it with some style and class. Good for you--sometimes people do just make mistakes. And good for the woman to approach your mother and apologize as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DH and this woman have been friends/workmates for about 10 years now.
We invited her and her husband to our wedding and they RSVP saying they would attend.
To our surprise on the day of the wedding she walked in with 2 friends(who we didn't know).She didn't ask us before nor did she bring any gift or say thanks for inviting me.
This left us so annoyed.DH decided it was time for him to cut off the friendship because he felt disrespected.Since then we cut off completely and haven't heard from her either.Luckily DH found another job .
Although we moved on I am still disturbed as to how this friend would come to our wedding with 2 other guests not on our list.Wow!People are so NOT Polite.

When did you get married OP? My guess that since dh has found another job, it's been a few months at least. You say "we moved on" yet you're also "disturbed" by what happened. Let it go. Put a period on it. I'm not sure why you're posting.

[Anonymous]

When I was 21 and still in college a friend got married. She was a year older and did not have my address, another friend received the invitation and added me and another friend as a plus two. I thought it was odd. I had really only been to one wedding in my life when I was 10 so was fairly clueless. My bride actually tracked me down by phone to invite me and I told her that the other friend had rsvp'd for me and the third. She was actually happy we were going but it was a big formal wedding and I knew immediately when I spoke to the bride this was odd. The same friend rsvp'd for herself and her parents to another friends wedding about 3 years later and the groom called her to say it was a problem. That friend is great but has some social cue issues.

[Anonymous]

OP I am a little confused your subject line asks what to do but then in the body you imply the wedding has already happened. If it's happened, then nothing needs to be done. ???

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's rude, but was your wedding ruined?

At our wedding, which was supposed to be "no kids", one of Dh's co-workers showed up with his 2 little girls.

I was a little surprised when I saw them, but honestly--they were very well behaved. I have no idea what happened with the seating, as the table the co-worker and his wife were assigned to was full...I'm sure the owner of my venue was just able to smooth it over so it didn't become my concern.

My mom told me later that the co-workers wife approached her, very embarrassed, apolgozing because she didn't realize that kids were not expected--of course my mom told her it was fine and complimented how well behaved the girls were, how pretty they looked in their nice dresses, etc.

Your invitation clearly stated "no children" and she didn't know '? Probably too ce
heap to hire a babysitter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We had our wedding in key west with very close friends and family only, no 'extras'. We had three people ask us if they could bring a date and we said no due to the small wedding we wanted to have and locale, budget, etc. all three brought the others and no gifts, which is beyond tacky. At any rate, we were really irritated at the time but what do you do at your own wedding? You move on and get over it. It has been 7 years for us and I no longer care.

Actually I sympathize with your guests here. If you are going to have a destination wedding and expect people to travel then the least you can do is spring for a dinner for their significant other.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's rude, but was your wedding ruined?

At our wedding, which was supposed to be "no kids", one of Dh's co-workers showed up with his 2 little girls.

I was a little surprised when I saw them, but honestly--they were very well behaved. I have no idea what happened with the seating, as the table the co-worker and his wife were assigned to was full...I'm sure the owner of my venue was just able to smooth it over so it didn't become my concern.

My mom told me later that the co-workers wife approached her, very embarrassed, apolgozing because she didn't realize that kids were not expected--of course my mom told her it was fine and complimented how well behaved the girls were, how pretty they looked in their nice dresses, etc.

Your invitation clearly stated "no children" and she didn't know '? Probably too ce
heap to hire a babysitter.

Most wedding invites don't say no children but it is indicated on the inside envelope. If it says mr and mrs smith then that's who is invited. If it says mr and mrs smith and on the next line master jack smith then you know your child is invited as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, this is typical in Filipino culture. Also some middle easterners do this.

And was the wedding in the Philippines or the Middle East?

No, are you really that dense? I was responding to the poster who said they had a filipina guest that did this and merely pointing out that there are certain cultures where this is normal. In case you didn't realize we live in a multicultural society and not everyone learns and adapts all american customs the day they arrive at Ellis island. It's part of the beauty of this country.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes, this is typical in Filipino culture. Also some middle easterners do this.

And was the wedding in the Philippines or the Middle East?

No, are you really that dense? I was responding to the poster who said they had a filipina guest that did this and merely pointing out that there are certain cultures where this is normal. In case you didn't realize we live in a multicultural society and not everyone learns and adapts all american customs the day they arrive at Ellis island. It's part of the beauty of this country.

Ha! American customs. As if there is such a thing from a country made up of other people.

[Anonymous]

Who are these people that would want to just tag along to some random person's wedding? Did they all have plans for the day and the invited friend said "hey, I know, we can all go to this wedding of my co-worker. " and the other two just thought that was a great idea?