Catty little girls

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As the mom of a former (I hope) mean girl, I can tell you it is VERY HARD to stop the behavior. It involves repeated corrections. Some kids just are not born empathetic -- they have to be taught it over and over, with specific examples. It's not that easy for some kids to understand how other kids feel. I must have asked her "how would you feel if you were being left out, etc." every day for years. I think the message is finally sinking in (hooray!). Some of the parents of the "mean kids" are trying as hard as we can, believe me.

Thanks for sharing. This is so interesting. Sounds like your daughter is lvery ucky to have you by her side!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
if i really stop to think about it, i remember times when i was the target of bullying... and other times when i was the bully. the times when i was the target are easier to remember but i am sure most of us have had times when we unfairly bossed around other kids (maybe younger siblings even).

Thanks for this. I think it's important to keep in mind that many children can go from being bullied to being the bully. The "nice" girl/ "mean" girl camps are not as clearly defined as we think.

[Anonymous]

Gosh, I was bullyed consistently from 3rd to 6th grade by a clique of neighborhood girls and it was horrible. I still think about it to this day, and it's been more than 25 years now! Part of it was that, I don't think I was learning the best social skills at home.

I've come a long way and I have a solid group of friends now, especially since college, but still, the memory of it all just make me feel like a social loser.

I hope my boy and girl never are on the giving or receiving end of such torture. Are there some good books to help deal with this? I really don't know how I would handle it if my child were being left out all the time, for example.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Gosh, I was bullyed consistently from 3rd to 6th grade by a clique of neighborhood girls and it was horrible. I still think about it to this day, and it's been more than 25 years now! Part of it was that, I don't think I was learning the best social skills at home.

I've come a long way and I have a solid group of friends now, especially since college, but still, the memory of it all just make me feel like a social loser.

I hope my boy and girl never are on the giving or receiving end of such torture. Are there some good books to help deal with this? I really don't know how I would handle it if my child were being left out all the time, for example.

Can't recommend any books, but wanted to send some moral support. I was bullied briefly in 8th grade by this really short, fat girl who reminded me of a little cocker spaniel. When I look back on it I think she was just a pathetic loser and probably still is!
Just as your bullies were. If you feel good about yourself, you typically don't pick on others.