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Not circumsizing your son--what was your experience?
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Anonymous
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DS#1 -- not circumcised. Huge adhesions from age 6 months to 4. Many doctors consulted with varying ideas of what to do. We finally had him circumcised at age 4 and no problems since. It was not traumatic for him.
DS#2 -- circumcised at birth due to brother's issues. Adhesions. I don't know the right answer but I feel like a lot of my life has been spent worrying about penises. |
Anonymous
How did you know DS#1 had adhesions? |
Anonymous
| Adhesions from 6 months to 4 would be normal. They're protective and retractability comes with time. |
Anonymous
Our ped tried to retracted it at his 6 month check up and couldn't. From what we learned adhesions are pretty normal but his were rather large. When he would get an erection (sorry, is it really an erection in a baby?!?!) it would be very painful for him. We got a lot of conflicting information, retract and lube or just leave it alone. Neither one really worked for him and as he got older is became very apparent that his penis was painful for him a lot of the time. He wouldn't want anyone to touch it, changing diapers would freak him out, etc. |
Anonymous
I'm sorry, that sounds hard. I'm glad he's fine now. I'm confused by the ped retracting at 6 months. Ours doesn't do that ever, which is what I've been come to understand is the standard practice. |
Anonymous
The doctor caused the adhesions. Poor baby! American doctors often do not understand that you should NEVER retract an infant's foreskin. That is so sad. And so sad that his little brother was also circumcised because of one ignorant doctor. It's unbelievable how ignorant so many doctors are about uncircumcised penises. We were told that our 6 year-old needed surgery because his foreskin had not yet retracted. We did our research and found out that the average age is 10! Sometimes they don't retract until puberty. A different pediatrician also told us we needed to circumcise him because he had a urinary tract infection! |
Anonymous
This is a pretty clear case of a doctor causing the boys problems. This is the problem we have in the US - doctors do not learn normal penis care. They have been taught incorrectly, they practice incorrectly, they themselves are circumcised and view that as "normal", and then we have all these little boys who wind up with penis problems.....and it perpetuates the myth that there is something wrong with a normal (intact) penis. For all those who have intact sons, or are planning to leave their boys intact, please note: NO ONE SHOULD EVER TRY TO RETRACT YOUR SONS FORESKIN. The foreskin is SUPPOSED to be attached to the glans while they are babies and toddlers. Yes, the entire foreskin is supposed to be adhered. So *of course* a six month old would have adhesions. It would actually be strange if they didn't (though in rare cases the foreskin does retract at this early age - not that anyone should be fiddling with it to find out). Any attempts at retracting (even just "to check") can cause painful tearing of the foreskin. Imagine what would happen if a doctor insisted on shoving a blunt object into a baby girls vagina just "to check" if the hymen had separated yet. Every body is a little different, so the rate and process that the foreskin loosens is going to vary a little from child to child, so the best course of action is to pay as little attention to it as possible, and one day your son will discover, all on his own, and without hurting himself, that his foreskin can push back. |
Anonymous
Could you imagine if a doctor recommended cutting off a baby girl's foreskin because she kept getting UTIs? Girls and boys alike sometimes get various infections in their genitals. With girls: use medication! With boys: cut something off! Bizarre, isn't it? |
Anonymous
I'm so so sorry, that must have been awful and frustrating for you. A massive amount of damage would be caused by attempted retraction. Retracting and lubing would be awful advice -- picture someone advising you to retract someone's fingernails to clean underneath. Adhesions, yes large adhesions, totally normal. Adhesions caused by trauma = not normal, not good. 
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Anonymous
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We didn't circ and it's been a complete non-issue. DS is 18 mos now. When we've started at a new daycare, we make sure they're aware of proper procedures, but the reaction has always been "of course we won't mess with it." Pediatrician has never tried to retract or told us we should be doing it.
FWIW, DH grew up intact in the Midwest in the 70s and doesn't remember it being a big deal in the locker room, even though he was definitely in the minority. He actually had mild phimosis and was predictably advised to circ, but decided to solve the problem the old fashioned way - via regular, ah, manual therapy. |
Anonymous
| In the finding a partner discussion of this, my aunt had my uncle get circumcised and he was in his 40's. That is cringeworthy to me and wish I didn't know about this. So, sometimes a partner does care. |
Anonymous
I would suspect that is due to sheer ignorance. We have had several decades where circ was the norm, so it is to be expected that there existed a contingent of women who honestly did not know any better. Our sons today are growing up in a completely different situation. Today, we have many people from other countries (where circumcision is not practiced) living amongst us, even in middle-upper class neighborhoods. Today, we travel frequently to other parts of the country and world. Today, we have the internet to connect us instantly with people of different cultures. Our children - sons and daughters - will have much greater exposure to normal penises. All of these things are gradually helping us to understand, as a society, that circumcision is unnecessary and harmful. Over the past decade the circumcision rate has dropped dramatically in this country, and in some areas of the US it is now much more common to be uncircumcised. I expect that over the next ten years, we will see our rates fall more in line with Canada's, where now only 5-10% of boys are circumcised. Of course the Jewish will still be circumcised, and their right to do so should always be protected and honored until (if ever) they choose differently. |
Anonymous
your uncle should have just chopped off the whole thing. doesn't sound like he was using any of it since he let your aunt insist he cut off part of the most sensitive part of his body for no apparent reason. your aunt sounds awful and your uncle sounds like a desperate push-over. |
Anonymous
Even a lot of Jewish people are opting out. Unless they keep kosher and practice faithfully, I don't see why it's necessary. People cling to that tradition while rejecting so many others like women shaving their heads and taking ritual baths. I was raised Jewish but not kosher or particularly religious and I did not circumcise DS. |
Anonymous
That is really refreshing to hear. Do you think that is starting to spread through the groups of "culturally Jewish" folks? Or are you a complete anomaly? |