How is it not to be Jewish at Sidwell

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not to take this thread off its anti-Semitic track, but it is often the case IMHO that the parents who serve as tour guides are not terribly representative of the school parents. Or perhaps I should say that they represent the school parents terribly!!

Think about it. The tour parents often tend to enjoy standing in front of groups and getting noticed, think they are high up in the "parent hierarchy" which is a term only THEY use, be pretentious, select a private school at least in part for "connections" and so forth.

The quiet parents who are completely average, normal folks who care about their kids' education but view the school as a SCHOOL rather than the new center of their family's social world generally do not step forward and volunteer to lead tours. Sometimes they graciously agree to do so when asked ....

So keep this in mind when you tour schools. It is the teachers who will be interacting with your children every day, so pay attention to the vibes you get from them ... not pretentious parents and administrators.

I appreciate the note of reason you're trying to bring to the discussion, but I am disappointed by your implying that parents who volunteer tend to be strivers and jerks. I volunteer to give tours at my child's school, and it's just because I'm happy enough with the school and because I remember how hard the application process was. So I'm willing to sacrifice a weeknight or a Saturday to help out the school and other families applying. In my experience, there's no hierarchy associated with volunteers -- no one's really competing to show up at school on Saturday morning at 8am! I'm sure some jerky parents volunteer at every school -- maybe I'm a jerk and don't realize it! -- but most volunteers seem to be pretty considerate and conscientious.

Maybe PP just was unlucky enough to get a jerk, or maybe she misinterpreted what the other person meant.

[Anonymous]

Funny...my impression from the open house was that the top people are Jewish! I mean, they may call themselves Quakers...but you
have to be BORN a Quaker to BE a quaker...the rest just 'sit in' and participate.
Kinda like the Universalists: ex-Catholics and Jews, looking for a place to participate.
So don't let 'religion' get in the way...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Funny...my impression from the open house was that the top people are Jewish! I mean, they may call themselves Quakers...but you
have to be BORN a Quaker to BE a quaker...the rest just 'sit in' and participate.
Kinda like the Universalists: ex-Catholics and Jews, looking for a place to participate.
So don't let 'religion' get in the way...

Wow. I'm not Quaker but I find this offensive. You actually don't have to be born a Quaker, like pretty much every religion, you can convert. And it is a real religion with a rich theology and everything. Putting it in quote "religion" is unbelievably disrespectful. Wow.

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think the point is that some people are offended by the constant parent whining and lobbying for ones child that seems to have become the new standard MO at Sidwell.Whether it be calling the Head of school about a grade DD or DS was given or complaining about play time in a sport ,the poor form of this new type of parent community detracts from the civility of what was once a fine school. The response is:" who cares, all I care about is my kid" and that is precisely the problem. It is death by a thousand cuts and all the $$$ in the endowment can't return the integrity to the school.[/quote]


And it's only Jews who do this? Yeah, right. This antisemitic crap is so ridiculous. What century are you people from? Believe it or not, there are plenty of crass rich assholes who are NOT Jewish. And (although I'm sure you would find this even harder to believe) there are plenty of Jews -- the majority I know, certainly-- who are neither crass nor rich. [/quote]

Excuse me, but where in my post do you find the word Jewish ??? [/quote]

The entire thread is about Jews at Sidwell. Look at the title of the thread. So when you go into a thread about Jews and trash the parents for whining and lobbying, you can't be offended when people think you are talking about jewish parents. I certainly thought so. Why else would you post your rant in this thread?

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think the point is that some people are offended by the constant parent whining and lobbying for ones child that seems to have become the new standard MO at Sidwell.Whether it be calling the Head of school about a grade DD or DS was given or complaining about play time in a sport ,the poor form of this new type of parent community detracts from the civility of what was once a fine school. The response is:" who cares, all I care about is my kid" and that is precisely the problem. It is death by a thousand cuts and all the $$$ in the endowment can't return the integrity to the school.[/quote]


And it's only Jews who do this? Yeah, right. This antisemitic crap is so ridiculous. What century are you people from? Believe it or not, there are plenty of crass rich assholes who are NOT Jewish. And (although I'm sure you would find this even harder to believe) there are plenty of Jews -- the majority I know, certainly-- who are neither crass nor rich. [/quote]

Excuse me, but where in my post do you find the word Jewish ??? [/quote]

The entire thread is about Jews at Sidwell. Look at the title of the thread. So when you go into a thread about Jews and trash the parents for whining and lobbying, you can't be offended when people think you are talking about jewish parents. I certainly thought so. Why else would you post your rant in this thread?[/quote]

Oh, gosh...I must be the first person to take a thread in a different direction. Seems that happens a lot here, but perhaps I am the first one.

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Hmmm. . .Sidwell is a Quaker school isn't it? Seems like Jewish kids would be in the minority.[/quote]

Well the Jewish parent tour guide who said to me ," no, you don't have to be a Quaker to get in because most of them are dead" seemed VERY comfortable in her assertion so much so she felt perfectly confident saying something like that to strangers on a parent tour.[/quote]

How did you know she was Jewish?[/quote]

Because her next statement to our group was, " Our family is Jewsih and we feel very comfortable here...the Quaker thing is very quiet...the kids just go to meeting, sit there ...sometimes an interesting topic will come up,sometimes they just day dream and I'm fine with that."

What difference does it make... my point is not that the culture of Sidwell is neuveau riche and Jewish; it's that it has lost its Quaker identity in my opinion . This is to the extent that a member of the school community would represent the school that way on a prospective parent tour. Do you honestly think the AD would let just anyone who wants reperesent the school as a parent guide step into that role. Perhaps it is an open invitation to volunteer, but there are ways of saying politely,"thank you, so much , but we have everyone we need" . Do you think Athletic programs let just any athlete on the team host the top recruits....come on, this is the "in crowd" and you know it.And yes, an AD might feel pressured to let so and so be a parent guide if they've given a lot of money and THAT is what they want to do. This is also how people get to be PA President,on the Board , etc. .Pretty soon you look around and guess what: THAT is your new parent community. Quakers? What Quakers? "No, you don't have to be a Quaker" because

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous]Not to take this thread off its anti-Semitic track, but it is often the case IMHO that the parents who serve as tour guides are not terribly representative of the school parents. Or perhaps I should say that they represent the school parents terribly!!

Think about it. The tour parents often tend to enjoy standing in front of groups and getting noticed, think they are high up in the "parent hierarchy" which is a term only THEY use, be pretentious, select a private school at least in part for "connections" and so forth.

The quiet parents who are completely average, normal folks who care about their kids' education but view the school as a SCHOOL rather than the new center of their family's social world generally do not step forward and volunteer to lead tours. Sometimes they graciously agree to do so when asked ....

So keep this in mind when you tour schools. It is the teachers who will be interacting with your children every day, so pay attention to the vibes you get from them ... not pretentious parents and administrators. [/quote]

Sorry but parents acting entitled and wanting special breaks for their kid does affect your child's day to day experience in the school. I heard of a situation where a student turned in another kid for cheating on a test and before it could be acted upon the lawyer Dad of the offender called the reporting child's parent and made threats to the effect of ,"shall we talk about your kid's exposure in this". No doubt this affected the teacher as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you honestly think the AD would let just anyone who wants reperesent the school as a parent guide step into that role. Perhaps it is an open invitation to volunteer, but there are ways of saying politely,"thank you, so much , but we have everyone we need" ..... And yes, an AD might feel pressured to let so and so be a parent guide if they've given a lot of money and THAT is what they want to do.

It's open sign up for volunteers. You clearly have no clue what you're talking about.

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think the point is that some people are offended by the constant parent whining and lobbying for ones child that seems to have become the new standard MO at Sidwell.Whether it be calling the Head of school about a grade DD or DS was given or complaining about play time in a sport ,the poor form of this new type of parent community detracts from the civility of what was once a fine school. The response is:" who cares, all I care about is my kid" and that is precisely the problem. It is death by a thousand cuts and all the $$$ in the endowment can't return the integrity to the school.[/quote]


And it's only Jews who do this? Yeah, right. This antisemitic crap is so ridiculous. What century are you people from? Believe it or not, there are plenty of crass rich assholes who are NOT Jewish. And (although I'm sure you would find this even harder to believe) there are plenty of Jews -- the majority I know, certainly-- who are neither crass nor rich. [/quote]

Excuse me, but where in my post do you find the word Jewish ??? [/quote]

The entire thread is about Jews at Sidwell. Look at the title of the thread. So when you go into a thread about Jews and trash the parents for whining and lobbying, you can't be offended when people think you are talking about jewish parents. I certainly thought so. Why else would you post your rant in this thread?[/quote]

Oh, gosh...I must be the first person to take a thread in a different direction. Seems that happens a lot here, but perhaps I am the first one.[/quote]

My point is that it wasn't clear you were digressing. Calm down.

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Do you honestly think the AD would let just anyone who wants reperesent the school as a parent guide step into that role. Perhaps it is an open invitation to volunteer, but there are ways of saying politely,"thank you, so much , but we have everyone we need" ..... And yes, an AD might feel pressured to let so and so be a parent guide if they've given a lot of money and THAT is what they want to do. [/quote]
It's open sign up for volunteers. You clearly have no clue what you're talking about.[/quote]


LOL. You only THINK its open .

[Anonymous]

Am I the only one reading this who doesn't believe that a tourguide said all of this? I mean, confusing the Quakers with the Shakers? Saying that the Quakers are mostly dead, so don't worry about them? This just doesn't sound plausible.

[Anonymous]

I agree. Fakey, fake fake.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Am I the only one reading this who doesn't believe that a tourguide said all of this? I mean, confusing the Quakers with the Shakers? Saying that the Quakers are mostly dead, so don't worry about them? This just doesn't sound plausible.

I was the one who asked about the Quaker/Shaker thing, and that poster answered that she was joking.

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous]And it's only Jews who do this? Yeah, right. This antisemitic crap is so ridiculous. What century are you people from? Believe it or not, there are plenty of crass rich assholes who are NOT Jewish. And (although I'm sure you would find this even harder to believe) there are plenty of Jews -- the majority I know, certainly-- who are neither crass nor rich. [/quote]
There are no poor people at private schools. The jews that you are referring to must have quite a bit of money to be even able to send their kid to Sidwell.
You need to travel to the other side of DC, or go to a 3rd world country to know what poor is.

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous]Am I the only one reading this who doesn't believe that a tourguide said all of this? I mean, confusing the Quakers with the Shakers? Saying that the Quakers are mostly dead, so don't worry about them? This just doesn't sound plausible.[/quote]

Do you want her name? It was fall of 2006. She said and I quote," no, you don't have to be a Quaker ( to get in) because, first of al,l most of them are dead" "our family is not Quaker, we are Jewish and I as a mother am fine with my kids attending meeting....sometimes they have a good topc, sometimes they just day dream...I don't have a problem with that" At which ponit she adjusted her white Jackie O Chanel sunglasses.

The snarky comment ,"maybe she meant shakers" was someone cracking a joke on this site. I'm sure Jappy mother parent had no knowledge of the shaker movement or the wonderful furniture that they were known for any more than she had the manners to know what NOT to say at a public gathering.