Where did all this entitlement come from?

[Anonymous]

I had a woman screaming at me when I was the first car in the pick up line for an activity. One activity ends and the next one starts immediately after so there is a mess of cars dropping off and picking up. I didn't start at the front but after the first car or two left I was eventually first. She thought this was a drop off line only and freaked out that I wasn't moving. I think of her fondly every time I'm in the pick up lane wondering where she's dropping off.

Also I know that people like her would never dare yell at a man but she felt entitled to be rude (and wrong) to another woman. I gather she has figured out the system now.

[Anonymous]

It’s the after effects of Covid + the mostly socially isolated Gen Z’s coming of age. I’m not saying things were perfect in 2019 and before, but everything that happened with Covid and the mistakes on both sides in the response and the discourse really soured the whole public environment. And if you’re a Gen Z who became an adult right before or during COVID, that’s all you’ve ever known so that’s how you’ve always behaved.

[Anonymous]

Civilized society ended with the first Trump election and COVID sped it up. Second Trump election got it going again after things started to improve a bit post-COVID.

[Anonymous]

This is from a lack of leadership. Our political, cultural, and spiritual leaders do not emulate this behavior, nor do they (and we know one person in particular) ask or try to influence our culture by asking us to be neighborly, to be better to one another. There is cache to “own the libs” or denigrate the more vulnerable in our society. Throw in a little social media, and disputes/arguments/“points of view” never find a middle ground, and here we are…

Alas, even being the change we wish to see feels like spitting in the wind.

[Anonymous]

We have become a society obsessed with our own feelings. Take a look at the endless online discourse about “self-care” and “trauma.”

[Anonymous]

Participation trophies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP and PPs, everyone but you and yours, right?

Um, correct. I do not cut around people waiting to make their turn, and I follow the rules of the road, such as waiting for oncoming traffic to pass before making my left turn. What's your point?

OP said everyone all the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP and PPs, everyone but you and yours, right?

Um, correct. I do not cut around people waiting to make their turn, and I follow the rules of the road, such as waiting for oncoming traffic to pass before making my left turn. What's your point?

OP said everyone all the time.

🙄

[Anonymous]

The most entitled person I know is one of my aunts. She's always been this way. It's her personality.

So no, I don't see more entitlement than I used to!

[Anonymous]

We’re the same as we always were.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have been telling generations of kids that they are super special, smart, can do and be anything. We made them believe that their confidence is what mattered and not their hard work and skills. We failed them because, of course, that is not true for the vast majority of them. And now we have a couple of generations of adults who are extremely entitled.

I don't think this is universal. There are absolutely a lot of people like this though. Mostly people who grew up UMC and came to believe their success in life comes from their intrinsic worth and not their good fortune at being born the children of doctors and lawyers, growing up in a safe and nurturing environment, and then attending "good" colleges (paid for by successful parents) and gaining entry into well paying careers. From their perspective, they had no more opportunities than anyone else and simply succeeded. They are entitled, yes, but also totally blind to the way the world actually works. The only people outside their bubble they can actually see are those above them professionally or economically. They'll obsess over the neighbor whose house cost a half million more or who got the big promotion they covet, and look right through anyone middle or working class in their orbit. Occasionally they'll find a working class people to pity, usually one who works for them, and they will endlessly tout how generous they are with this person (see the UMC mom who goes on and on about helping her nanny go visit her family overseas like she's Mother Theresa), it's how they deal with any creeping feelings of doubt that maybe their entire lives were handed to them and not actually earned after all.

If you think entitlement is limited to the UMC, you live in a real bubble.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It doesn't read as entitlement to me, exactly. That's there. But to me the prevailing feeling is angry. Everyone seems angry, and this makes them not care about others and to behave in more selfish ways, because it doesn't matter to them how their behavior impacts others.

But it just reads as less "I deserve this more than you" and more "I deserve this and I'm afraid you'll take it away from me if I don't aggressively snatch it out from under you."

I find myself spending less and less time in public spaces these days. It is too stressful. Especially because I'm a recovering people pleaser and nothing brings out my people pleasing instincts more than people acting angry or aggressive (I learned at a very young age to appease angry people in order to avoid becoming a target).

+2

I think what’s troubling is that we don’t even operate under the guise of pleasantness, politeness etc. People are extremely pushy and impatient. The outside world is much less pleasant than even ten years ago.

Covid+the internet/phone addiction have accelerated this decline imo.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It doesn't read as entitlement to me, exactly. That's there. But to me the prevailing feeling is angry. Everyone seems angry, and this makes them not care about others and to behave in more selfish ways, because it doesn't matter to them how their behavior impacts others.

But it just reads as less "I deserve this more than you" and more "I deserve this and I'm afraid you'll take it away from me if I don't aggressively snatch it out from under you."

I find myself spending less and less time in public spaces these days. It is too stressful. Especially because I'm a recovering people pleaser and nothing brings out my people pleasing instincts more than people acting angry or aggressive (I learned at a very young age to appease angry people in order to avoid becoming a target).

I could have wrote this. Angry everywhere entitled and angry in and around cities. I just don't want to be around these people anymore.

But could you have written this?

[Anonymous]

Hate to get political but look at our President……

Unfortunately our young as well as impressionable kids are viewing him as a role model which scares me to death.

But I think even adults are taking a page out of his rule book.

Our President acts entitled all the time (and he gets away w/it!)
So of course then society is influenced which is unfortunate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hate to get political but look at our President……

Unfortunately our young as well as impressionable kids are viewing him as a role model which scares me to death.

But I think even adults are taking a page out of his rule book.

Our President acts entitled all the time (and he gets away w/it!)
So of course then society is influenced which is unfortunate.

That plus the billionaire class- to keep it from being political.
They literally think that they are better and they should not be shamed for enjoying their lifestyle. There's a whole progression of Jeff Bezos that will fascinate anthropologists. Rather than being introspective or humbled they are indignant to be questioned and literally think they are above the law, any law.