Parents, I’m sorry but you’ve got to teach your boys some manners

[Anonymous]

I can understand why this child would have a bad reaction to a crazy person like OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Last night DS (7th grade) had a friend over after school, and he stayed for dinner. During dinner, I’m sorry, but this kid was just behaving in a way that was completely unacceptable. It wasn’t just bad table manners. He also said a lot of unkind things to me and DH, including saying my earrings were ugly and other things of that nature. This isn’t the only time something like this has happened with one of DS’s friends, either. I understand that it’s a difficult age, but I would never have dreamed of behaving this way when I was in middle school. I always feel so awkward disciplining someone else’s child, though! Parents of boys, PLEASE teach your sons some GD manners, because this is crossing the line. Completely. Okay, rant over.

Sounds like you’re raising a kid who gravitates to rude kids. What does that tell you?

+1. This is a you problem OP. Why would your son want a kid like this to eat dinner with his parents? Something is wrong with your kid.

Maybe the friend is lashing out in response to abuse and OP's kid is trying to provide a safe and stable environment.

[Anonymous]

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Last night DS (7th grade) had a friend over after school, and he stayed for dinner. During dinner, I’m sorry, but this kid was just behaving in a way that was completely unacceptable. It wasn’t just bad table manners. He also said a lot of unkind things to me and DH, including saying my earrings were ugly and other things of that nature. This isn’t the only time something like this has happened with one of DS’s friends, either. I understand that it’s a difficult age, but I would never have dreamed of behaving this way when I was in middle school. I always feel so awkward disciplining someone else’s child, though! Parents of boys, PLEASE teach your sons some GD manners, because this is crossing the line. Completely. Okay, rant over.

Sounds like you’re raising a kid who gravitates to rude kids. What does that tell you?

+1. This is a you problem OP. Why would your son want a kid like this to eat dinner with his parents? Something is wrong with your kid.

Maybe the friend is lashing out in response to abuse and OP's kid is trying to provide a safe and stable environment.

Maybe OP’s earrings are objectively ugly.

Did you buy them at a craft fair? Was everyone involved in the making, selling, and purchasing of the earrings at least a little high?

[Anonymous]

OP's DS's friends are negging OP because they she's a hot cougar

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP's DS's friends are negging OP because they she's a hot cougar

I bet that’s it!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm a third grade teacher. Other things kids need to be taught and many aren't:

1. Don't ask an adult their age. Ever.
2. Don't tell an adult they "look tired" or "look sick."
3. In general don't ask nosy questions.

I do my best but I still just can't believe what has become of manners and decorum.

This one's tough but don't be LOUD.
Most of the kids we have over are more than lovely but this one girl is loud and cannot modulate her voice. I think she comes from a loud household so it's really tough- she has a norm so of course she does what she knows and doesn't have a quiet house to compare to.

We just stick to hangouts that are like, a movie theater when it comes to her. They're so loud anyways.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

😆

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can understand why this child would have a bad reaction to a crazy person like OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel like it’s just “cool” to rude. The snark/sarcasm and meanness is all around. Perhaps it’s social media, but I’ve even seen it in books and shows geared for younger kids.

Not in front of parents, at least in my circle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Last night DS (7th grade) had a friend over after school, and he stayed for dinner. During dinner, I’m sorry, but this kid was just behaving in a way that was completely unacceptable. It wasn’t just bad table manners. He also said a lot of unkind things to me and DH, including saying my earrings were ugly and other things of that nature. This isn’t the only time something like this has happened with one of DS’s friends, either. I understand that it’s a difficult age, but I would never have dreamed of behaving this way when I was in middle school. I always feel so awkward disciplining someone else’s child, though! Parents of boys, PLEASE teach your sons some GD manners, because this is crossing the line. Completely. Okay, rant over.

Sounds like you’re raising a kid who gravitates to rude kids. What does that tell you?

This. Why is your kid ok with their friends behaving like this?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Girls too, though. I've been told a lot of really rude things by girls coming over for play dates. At certain ages I think it's normal for the age, they are testing to see what they can get away with. By 13 I expect them to say please and thank you, not insult me to my face, and be pleasant to my DD and the rest of the family. Otherwise no repeat invite.

This. OP decided to single out boys when it’s an issue with boys and girls. And girls at that age tend to be more verbally sophisticated and their remarks are more calculated and hurtful.

Maybe it’s OP who needs to stop being such a hater.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Last night DS (7th grade) had a friend over after school, and he stayed for dinner. During dinner, I’m sorry, but this kid was just behaving in a way that was completely unacceptable. It wasn’t just bad table manners. He also said a lot of unkind things to me and DH, including saying my earrings were ugly and other things of that nature. This isn’t the only time something like this has happened with one of DS’s friends, either. I understand that it’s a difficult age, but I would never have dreamed of behaving this way when I was in middle school. I always feel so awkward disciplining someone else’s child, though! Parents of boys, PLEASE teach your sons some GD manners, because this is crossing the line. Completely. Okay, rant over.

Sounds like you’re raising a kid who gravitates to rude kids. What does that tell you?

+1. This is a you problem OP. Why would your son want a kid like this to eat dinner with his parents? Something is wrong with your kid.

Maybe the friend is lashing out in response to abuse and OP's kid is trying to provide a safe and stable environment.

Maybe OP’s earrings are objectively ugly.

Did you buy them at a craft fair? Was everyone involved in the making, selling, and purchasing of the earrings at least a little high?

Sorry to tell you but almost any top level creative work is done by people who either do or have done drugs. All of your clothes, movies, music, visual art etc done by people who get high.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t have any problem telling kids “hey that was rude” or “we don’t talk like that in this house”. If they don’t want to come back that’s fine but in general my kids friends just forget themselves for a minute and need a reminder. I would be fine for any of their parents to do the same.

Absolutely this. It takes a village and sometimes you are that villager. But I have three teens and have never had kids be this rude. If they are saying stuff like your earrings are ugly they are almost certainly neurodivergent. I would just say “it’s not polite to criticize someone’s clothing or jewelry” and move on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:One of my son's friend's used the f word when I was driving them in elementary school. I stopped at the next parking spot and turned around and said he would no longer be allowed in my car if he spoke like that again. He's 20 now, and still no cursing in front of me!

Jeez, that’s extreme. I want my kids friends to feel like they can talk in front of me without my policing them. You hear the best stuff when they are willing to talk in front of you!

I’m also not offended by the use of that particular f- word. If they use the n word, the r word or the other f word, then I’d have that conversation. I don’t care about off-color language but I do care about hurtful language.