Zarna Garg podcast

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like they are an immigrant family who were trying to put three kids through HM on a single salary while being sensitive to wealth disparity. That’s probably the most salient part. Bronx science is an excellent school especially for STEM-oriented kids, and you can put the money saved on tuition towards college counseling, tutoring, ECs. If money is not a significant concern, I’d still take HM over BxSci — better facilities, better campus, better sports, better food, smaller classes, great theater/ arts programs. The college outcomes are a wash and hard to predict at this point. Yes, you will encounter some very wealthy families, but there are plenty of working parents, kids on scholarships, etc, especially in the upper grades.

Do you know who Zarna Garg is? This is a hilarious description of someone who is incredibly successful.

I started listening, and that was what she was saying about the early years at least. The podcast was pretty boring; I neither know nor care who she is, sorry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I experienced this at a TT girls school - starting in third grade my daughter knew whose parents were the big donors to the school and that those kids didn’t get into trouble if they misbehaved. In middle school, girls were getting extra time on standardized test and accommodations because of who their parents were. None of them were actually neurodivergent but were given twice the time for their ERBs with a doctor’s notes while kids who weren’t rich or powerful couldn’t get it WITH a doctor’s note. We got sick of it and left. Frankly, I didn’t trust them with my kid’s college exmissions. Talk to parents at these schools and ask what their kid reports. The thing I learned is that no one knows the unwritten rules of these places better than the kids who are in them, and the middle and upper parents know things the lower school parents don’t.

As a parent beginning the process of applying to private schools now, these types of stories are really discouraging. We're also ORMs without a hook, getting in already seems so daunting and then dealing with this stuff once you're in? what a shitshow.

We don't want to move to the suburbs, but I'm keeping an eye out for opportunities in my home country and Europe, where this kind of stuff is pretty rare.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I experienced this at a TT girls school - starting in third grade my daughter knew whose parents were the big donors to the school and that those kids didn’t get into trouble if they misbehaved. In middle school, girls were getting extra time on standardized test and accommodations because of who their parents were. None of them were actually neurodivergent but were given twice the time for their ERBs with a doctor’s notes while kids who weren’t rich or powerful couldn’t get it WITH a doctor’s note. We got sick of it and left. Frankly, I didn’t trust them with my kid’s college exmissions. Talk to parents at these schools and ask what their kid reports. The thing I learned is that no one knows the unwritten rules of these places better than the kids who are in them, and the middle and upper parents know things the lower school parents don’t.

As a parent beginning the process of applying to private schools now, these types of stories are really discouraging. We're also ORMs without a hook, getting in already seems so daunting and then dealing with this stuff once you're in? what a shitshow.

We don't want to move to the suburbs, but I'm keeping an eye out for opportunities in my home country and Europe, where this kind of stuff is pretty rare.

Why do you want private school? Rarefied network, smaller classes, resources, develop critical thinking skills? Then go for it

Ivy League or Ivy+ admission? Not a good reason to attend. Better off being top of a T2 private or going to a Bx Sci or Stuy and killing it (merit based).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I experienced this at a TT girls school - starting in third grade my daughter knew whose parents were the big donors to the school and that those kids didn’t get into trouble if they misbehaved. In middle school, girls were getting extra time on standardized test and accommodations because of who their parents were. None of them were actually neurodivergent but were given twice the time for their ERBs with a doctor’s notes while kids who weren’t rich or powerful couldn’t get it WITH a doctor’s note. We got sick of it and left. Frankly, I didn’t trust them with my kid’s college exmissions. Talk to parents at these schools and ask what their kid reports. The thing I learned is that no one knows the unwritten rules of these places better than the kids who are in them, and the middle and upper parents know things the lower school parents don’t.

As a parent beginning the process of applying to private schools now, these types of stories are really discouraging. We're also ORMs without a hook, getting in already seems so daunting and then dealing with this stuff once you're in? what a shitshow.

We don't want to move to the suburbs, but I'm keeping an eye out for opportunities in my home country and Europe, where this kind of stuff is pretty rare.

Why do you want private school? Rarefied network, smaller classes, resources, develop critical thinking skills? Then go for it

Ivy League or Ivy+ admission? Not a good reason to attend. Better off being top of a T2 private or going to a Bx Sci or Stuy and killing it (merit based).

Smaller class sizes and a dislike of the public school curriculum, mostly. I don't really care about college admissions or "networks". But being a minority and then also dealing with this kind of unfairness is a lot for a kid to deal with. There's someone in another thread shitting all over suburban public school kids and their lack of erudition compared to Manhattan's TT elite. I worry about what we're putting ourselves and our kids through with this type of toxicity, if that's what "TT" schools are like.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The agenda is promoting their family brand as some sort of authority for the general public.

I have no doubt that their story and their perception of it is as described; people have all sorts of experiences, and this is one data point among many. The fact that this particular -- and seemingly unremarkable -- podcast is getting brought up here so much lately is what makes it sus.

You really love the word "unremarkable," don't you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The agenda is promoting their family brand as some sort of authority for the general public.

I have no doubt that their story and their perception of it is as described; people have all sorts of experiences, and this is one data point among many. The fact that this particular -- and seemingly unremarkable -- podcast is getting brought up here so much lately is what makes it sus.

You really love the word "unremarkable," don't you?

I mean -- I like it enough to have used it. once. on this here site. when it fit the description.

Sorry if that hurt your feelings -- please don't take it personally and have a good night, Zarna.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I experienced this at a TT girls school - starting in third grade my daughter knew whose parents were the big donors to the school and that those kids didn’t get into trouble if they misbehaved. In middle school, girls were getting extra time on standardized test and accommodations because of who their parents were. None of them were actually neurodivergent but were given twice the time for their ERBs with a doctor’s notes while kids who weren’t rich or powerful couldn’t get it WITH a doctor’s note. We got sick of it and left. Frankly, I didn’t trust them with my kid’s college exmissions. Talk to parents at these schools and ask what their kid reports. The thing I learned is that no one knows the unwritten rules of these places better than the kids who are in them, and the middle and upper parents know things the lower school parents don’t.

As a parent beginning the process of applying to private schools now, these types of stories are really discouraging. We're also ORMs without a hook, getting in already seems so daunting and then dealing with this stuff once you're in? what a shitshow.

We don't want to move to the suburbs, but I'm keeping an eye out for opportunities in my home country and Europe, where this kind of stuff is pretty rare.

Why do you want private school? Rarefied network, smaller classes, resources, develop critical thinking skills? Then go for it

Ivy League or Ivy+ admission? Not a good reason to attend. Better off being top of a T2 private or going to a Bx Sci or Stuy and killing it (merit based).

Smaller class sizes and a dislike of the public school curriculum, mostly. I don't really care about college admissions or "networks". But being a minority and then also dealing with this kind of unfairness is a lot for a kid to deal with. There's someone in another thread shitting all over suburban public school kids and their lack of erudition compared to Manhattan's TT elite. I worry about what we're putting ourselves and our kids through with this type of toxicity, if that's what "TT" schools are like.

You will want to avoid UES altogether. A part of raising a kid in UES is handling the social pressure and navigating the competitive environment. To be honest, placing my child in a competitive environment is one of the best gift I can give them to challenge themselves. As a parent it is my responsibility to put them in a position to succeed (provide as much support and guidance). Life isn’t always going to be easy. In my opinion, it is unfair if you have your child coast through school while expecting them to turn it on at high school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I experienced this at a TT girls school - starting in third grade my daughter knew whose parents were the big donors to the school and that those kids didn’t get into trouble if they misbehaved. In middle school, girls were getting extra time on standardized test and accommodations because of who their parents were. None of them were actually neurodivergent but were given twice the time for their ERBs with a doctor’s notes while kids who weren’t rich or powerful couldn’t get it WITH a doctor’s note. We got sick of it and left. Frankly, I didn’t trust them with my kid’s college exmissions. Talk to parents at these schools and ask what their kid reports. The thing I learned is that no one knows the unwritten rules of these places better than the kids who are in them, and the middle and upper parents know things the lower school parents don’t.

As a parent beginning the process of applying to private schools now, these types of stories are really discouraging. We're also ORMs without a hook, getting in already seems so daunting and then dealing with this stuff once you're in? what a shitshow.

We don't want to move to the suburbs, but I'm keeping an eye out for opportunities in my home country and Europe, where this kind of stuff is pretty rare.

Why do you want private school? Rarefied network, smaller classes, resources, develop critical thinking skills? Then go for it

Ivy League or Ivy+ admission? Not a good reason to attend. Better off being top of a T2 private or going to a Bx Sci or Stuy and killing it (merit based).

Smaller class sizes and a dislike of the public school curriculum, mostly. I don't really care about college admissions or "networks". But being a minority and then also dealing with this kind of unfairness is a lot for a kid to deal with. There's someone in another thread shitting all over suburban public school kids and their lack of erudition compared to Manhattan's TT elite. I worry about what we're putting ourselves and our kids through with this type of toxicity, if that's what "TT" schools are like.

You will want to avoid UES altogether. A part of raising a kid in UES is handling the social pressure and navigating the competitive environment. To be honest, placing my child in a competitive environment is one of the best gift I can give them to challenge themselves. As a parent it is my responsibility to put them in a position to succeed (provide as much support and guidance). Life isn’t always going to be easy. In my opinion, it is unfair if you have your child coast through school while expecting them to turn it on at high school.

There's competition and then there's sycophancy. Very, very familiar with the former, and I have no patience with the latter. No one expects their kids to coast through school, especially a competitive school. But if smart kids are getting overlooked and kids of donors/celebrities are getting special accommodations (as the podcast and that other poster claimed), that's a problem.

[Anonymous]

I’m the one who wrote about the TT girls school. It was Brearley, and I am not going to say where we went because of my girls’ privacy. What I wanted was really strong, rigorous academics and a kid with integrity and character who didn’t suck up to classmates who were “better” because of who their parents were, a kid who didn’t accept arcane aristocratic social rules in a country that doesn’t operate that way outside of a country club or two. I was surprised how openly okay other parents were with this stuff. I personally think it’s appalling to teach your kid to accept or exploit an unfair playing field— look at K-8, that is my advice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I’m the one who wrote about the TT girls school. It was Brearley, and I am not going to say where we went because of my girls’ privacy. What I wanted was really strong, rigorous academics and a kid with integrity and character who didn’t suck up to classmates who were “better” because of who their parents were, a kid who didn’t accept arcane aristocratic social rules in a country that doesn’t operate that way outside of a country club or two. I was surprised how openly okay other parents were with this stuff. I personally think it’s appalling to teach your kid to accept or exploit an unfair playing field— look at K-8, that is my advice.

You’re Brearley Hating Mom? I thought your issue was with the curriculum?

[Anonymous]

Omg Zara Gary and her entire family are Trump loving, immigrant hating hypocrites. Her shtick based on Indian mom stereotypes is so tired and pathetic. Her daughter gushes over Usha Vance, saying she made it permissible for Indian women to date white men. Hideous!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Omg Zara Gary and her entire family are Trump loving, immigrant hating hypocrites. Her shtick based on Indian mom stereotypes is so tired and pathetic. Her daughter gushes over Usha Vance, saying she made it permissible for Indian women to date white men. Hideous!

I'm not a Zarna fan but is what she's saying about her experience at HM valid? That's what I want to understand.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

You’re Brearley Hating Mom? I thought your issue was with the curriculum?

More than one person can have a bad experience at a school. My beef with the place was the favoritism for the children of rich donors. It could have the best curriculum of any school ever, and I wouldn’t want to teach my kid to put up with bullies who got to bully because of their parent’s wealth. It’s gross, and my educated guess is it’s detrimental to longterm success for both the bullier and the bullied. All of you who care about connections forget that the uber wealthy tend to cluster anyway. Most of those kids ain’t going to have patience for your lack of superfunds and will ditch anyone who is inconvenient the moment they are inconvenient. What the Gargs said about Horace Mann echoes what I have heard over the years. Didn’t apply there for that reason when my kids were little.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Omg Zara Gary and her entire family are Trump loving, immigrant hating hypocrites. Her shtick based on Indian mom stereotypes is so tired and pathetic. Her daughter gushes over Usha Vance, saying she made it permissible for Indian women to date white men. Hideous!

I'm not a Zarna fan but is what she's saying about her experience at HM valid? That's what I want to understand.

I posted above about my DS having a great experience at HM. We don't find favoritism to be a thing there, and overall the community has been warm, supportive, and friendly.

Zarna's experience is valid for Zarna, and she clearly has strong feelings about it. It's also clear that she had specific expectations about college placement, and I would offer that being hyper-focused on just a handful of "acceptable" colleges as the end goal is probably not a great platform from which to make decisions about your child's education.

If you're looking at HM for your DC, go on a tour and try to assess for yourself how you feel about the school and how your child may or may not thrive there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

You’re Brearley Hating Mom? I thought your issue was with the curriculum?

More than one person can have a bad experience at a school. My beef with the place was the favoritism for the children of rich donors. It could have the best curriculum of any school ever, and I wouldn’t want to teach my kid to put up with bullies who got to bully because of their parent’s wealth. It’s gross, and my educated guess is it’s detrimental to longterm success for both the bullier and the bullied. All of you who care about connections forget that the uber wealthy tend to cluster anyway. Most of those kids ain’t going to have patience for your lack of superfunds and will ditch anyone who is inconvenient the moment they are inconvenient. What the Gargs said about Horace Mann echoes what I have heard over the years. Didn’t apply there for that reason when my kids were little.

My apologies. You sounded like her, but I shouldn't have jumped to that assumption . . . just like you shouldn't assume that HM is just how you "heard" it is. In my firsthand experience, it has not been like that at all.