Does anyone get annoyed when people tell kids to do extracurriculars they are “passionate” about?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Passion has a pretty weak correlation with success from my experience, and many others would agree. A ton of kids who are passionate about sports can’t even pass tryouts for high school. Passion itself isn’t enough for extracurricular success

Actually I have seen a number of studies that suggest the opposite. There was one in particular that measured "success" (based on a set of metrics that included things like earnings, career trajectory, happiness, etc) against kids who are either "jack of all trades" in high school and achieving equally across all subjects / activities and kids who have a disproportionate interest in one particular area, whether it was academic, extra curricular etc. The studies found that students with a special interest or passion for one particular area, but lower achievement in other areas often times ended up with more measurable success in their lives than those students who excelled across the board but did not feel extraordinary about any particular area.

If you're only talking about achieving extra curricular success in high school, who cares? There's a whole world out there beyond high school and nobody gives a crap if you were on Varsity Baseball for 1, 2, 3 or 4 years or sat on the bench and kept the score.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Passion has a pretty weak correlation with success from my experience, and many others would agree. A ton of kids who are passionate about sports can’t even pass tryouts for high school. Passion itself isn’t enough for extracurricular success

Actually I have seen a number of studies that suggest the opposite. There was one in particular that measured "success" (based on a set of metrics that included things like earnings, career trajectory, happiness, etc) against kids who are either "jack of all trades" in high school and achieving equally across all subjects / activities and kids who have a disproportionate interest in one particular area, whether it was academic, extra curricular etc. The studies found that students with a special interest or passion for one particular area, but lower achievement in other areas often times ended up with more measurable success in their lives than those students who excelled across the board but did not feel extraordinary about any particular area.

If you're only talking about achieving extra curricular success in high school, who cares? There's a whole world out there beyond high school and nobody gives a crap if you were on Varsity Baseball for 1, 2, 3 or 4 years or sat on the bench and kept the score.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Many high school students are emotionally pressured and raised to believe that life is all about winning. They end up carrying their parents’ dreams instead of their own, and grow into adults who don’t really know how to be happy.

There’s nothing wrong with having passion — but too often, it must be a passion their parents approve of or something to make their parents look good

Because life is about winning. There are finite resources, and those resources are distributed unequally. It’s why some Americans are wealthy while others are living in a tent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Passion and parents who do travel sports give misguided hope to kids who are just not big enough for instance to play a sport.

This is a true crazy story I am not a sports person at all. Never played any sports even for fun other than shooting hoops in park once in awhile.

In HS one year I did track, just cause guidance counselor said to put something on application for college, ran cross country and indoor track, 100 yard dash type stuff.

Freshman year college I had a roommate a big football star in HS. He was only 5 foot 10 inches and used to complain nearly every school he applied to for offensive line or defensive line was a six foot minimum so all his work did not pay off. He used to say he love to have my body. Creepy. But he ment I was six foot two inch.

He liked to lift weights and I used to do it with him as I though help me meet the ladies.

Well I transfer colleges and get offered a full athletic scholarship in Lacrosse and also the Football team invited me to meet with them.

Granted my school had shitty teams but both did scholorships. So what the heck. I go get paperwork off coach and I go why? You are a 19 year old transfer student who is six foot two inch, 210 pound who can run miles at a time via cross country and can run fast via your track and you are in shaped and obvisously work out. I can teach you lacrcoss or the football can teach you the sports. I cant teach people to be six foot two inch 210 pounds and fast runners and in shape,

Bottom line I turned down the scholorship as I already had full financial aid. They did get me to do intramural football which I was pretty good at and then intramural basketball. Both sports I picked up at 20. Once again being able to run in basketball for a full 60 minutes made me good on defense and football was size and quickness.

Yet my HS I recall short little kids dads pushing. Really, Like my five foot ten inch roomate it was not going to happen

I was shocked my school my coach was checking out the transfers.

They check out the transfers because those kids are older and know how to do college. Was just reading about this the other day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Success is being happy. Not winning trophies.

+1

Take what your kid loves, let them pursue it with 120% effort and they will thrive. So if you cannot make travel Sport X, you do local versions and let your kid learn and thrive.

I cannot imagine forcing my kid to select ECs just to get into college.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What?

I encourage my kids to do ECs they enjoy- I don’t care if they are the best or even good as long as they are enjoying life. This is life too.

Some ECs are non negotiable- they have to learn to swim. They have to do at least one thing active.

Agreed!

From a young age we required 2 activities: one sporty/moving around and one art/music. But kids got to pick it. Only req was if you said you wanted soccer, you were finishing the season and going to practices and games---you had to stick with what you chose for the session.

And yes, we made sure swim was done as well until they learned how to be safe.

Beyond that, the kids get to pick the specific activities...and as they got older they added other ECs that interested them

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Passion has a pretty weak correlation with success from my experience, and many others would agree. A ton of kids who are passionate about sports can’t even pass tryouts for high school. Passion itself isn’t enough for extracurricular success

No, kids should do what makes them happy.

[Anonymous]

Both my kids played the same club and high school sport growing up. They both coached that sport in the rec leagues for their volunteer hours. They were passionate about the sport, but did not love coaching. We suggested they coach, supported them, and they understood it would show leadership and commitment. Coaching was a lot of work, on top of school, but they also learned a lot of skills. One of them still coaches local rec teamsin college. Looks like she ended up enjoying it after all.