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Yes. Usually once a weekend, sometimes twice in a weekend. We keep the house “company clean” in that we can vacuum, clean the powder room, and wipe down kitchen counters in less than 30 min before guests come over.
In a weird way, although it takes work to clean, having frequent guests is a good way to keep your house presentable. I’m always thinking, we will have so and so over on Saturday, so I try to plan to keep the house clean during the week for the weekend. If we didn’t have people over regularly, I’m pretty sure the house would be more of a mess. |
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We have always hosted. It forces you to clean your house! When kids were little we did brunch. People dispersed for naps.
With older kids it’s 5pm on Saturday or Sunday. Everyone is out by 930 usually. Sometimes I cook and sometimes it’s takeout. I think you are overthinking. Once you host a lot it gets pretty easy. |
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I feel you OP. I have the same internal struggle re: wanting to socialize versus wanting to potato vs is the house really looking good enough to invite people over. If I have to clean and prep for 4 to 5 hours, then it is just too much of a chore to be a net positive.
What I end up doing is have people over maybe once every other month, sometimes maybe just drinks in the yard, sometimes a bigger party where I tell myself that if the house isn’t perfect they probably won’t notice and if they do I am doing them a favor by letting them feel good about their own house. About twice a year we will have people for an indoor dinner which is more work but so far has turned out well each time and has been a lot off fun. |
| We do host people for gatherings, small dinner parties, kids parties etc. Our house is better suited for buffet style than sit down. More often, we do prefer to meet other couples out for dinner and sometimes we do family dinners with other families at restaurants like Japanese steakhouses and are well suited for larger groups. |
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OP, if you didn’t want to host, I would said it’s fine not to. We host frequently, and most of the families reciprocate, but we have at least 3-4 friends that we have hosted multiple times, and have never been invited over. I know it’s because they are busy, don’t have a house convenient for hosting, or don’t like hosting at all, etc, so I don’t mind.
But since you are interested in hosting, I would invite a family over on a saturday or Sunday around 5pm for a casual meal. If you are really worried about your kids, hire a babysitter, and the other family gets a break too. Order in and spend your efforts on cleaning, serving drinks and having good conversation. And for the first one, invite a family where you know and like both parents, if there are two parents. We have invited families over and discovered that the spouse is very unlikeable or tends to get overly drunk, which isn’t much fun. |
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I just sent 5 texts out to friends tonight for a dinner party in two weeks. Got two yays, one nay, and two haven't responded.
I'm also hosting book group next week. We entertain pretty regularly, but I do feel like people are huddling inside. Especially in DC. |
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I'm pp and kids out of the house, but we did this probably more when we had little kids. Now, we go out more with friends.
Don't worry about your house. I always liked it as an opportunity to tidy more, but not necessary. Find an easy meal that you can do over and over. Assembly meals are good for preferences. Burrito bowls, fajitas, pasta salads, etc. Or, order pizza, thai, whatever. Be vulnerable. Don't take no personally (but stop asking if they decline more than 2-3x). Have fun! |
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OP I posted earlier about hosting earlier but not being too formal or tidy.
One of the nice things about having another family over at home is that kids can eat but then also move around and play (mine are young) and there is more time to socialize with everyone together but afterward just as adults. My kids are good at restaurants but they only agree to sit and be confined for so long. |
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We probably have people over for dinner every couple months. Weeknights are a no-go, everyone feels way too busy and hectic, and weekends just fill up so fast.
We tend to do casual parties with easy food where we invite a bunch of people, like homemade pizza or chili. So it's not like a "dinner party," more "come over to our house to hang out and we'll also feed you." We live in a rowhome with a fairly small and narrow dining room, so more casual and open works better for a crowd and active kids. |
| I have people over in the summer to swim and I cook for them on the grill. Once summer is over I eat out with friends. They often have me over for dinner but I don't cook indoors. |
| I don’t understand how any of you have time. I have 2 teens who sometimes have activities until 9pm and HW that never ends. DH comes home around 9 or 10pm. Weekends are the only possibility. But does everybody have jobs that end at 5 or 6? Is no one in biglaw? |
I posted earlier. DH is in big law and we've hosted ever since we've had young kids, but he's not a litigator He loves hosting! Typically he does more setup/cooking than I do. |
What does that mean fool |
You make time fool we in big law |