Do you tell your nosey relatives - cousins, inlaws, aunts how much money you have if they ask?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No educated person has relatives like this

In other cultures, such direct questioning is common.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you have nosey relatives who ask about your cash and retirement accounts do you tell them the truth? Do you worry that they will hit you up for a loan?

“Less than you would think”
“Enough”
“I think we are on target to be able to retire”
“We are working on an emergency fund”
“We are saving what we are able”


“How but those Sox/Yanks? (depending on the audience)

[Anonymous]

I discuss finances regularly with my Sistrr in law. I’m older and a bit more established, but both of us became high income at a young age. She likes to get advice and I’m open with her and she with me. it’s NBD.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would not now, no. When I got my first job one of my aunts cornered me at a family cookout and kept asking how much I made, badgering me really, and saying "I'm your aunt, you can tell me" and eventually I just said my salary. I was so uncomfortable but didn't expect that line of questioning and didn't really have the tools to stand up for my own privacy.

If I were asked now I would just say "we're trying to be smart in our planning" or "we should be on track" or something vague like that, and if they pushed I'd switch to "why do you ask?"

Just respond "enough to live on. Why are you asking as it's not really your business"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I do. I’m a fed so my salary is already public. I max out my retirement account yearly.

My neighbor knew my mortgage balance one time and he let it slip once. I was surprised by that but I guess that’s public too?

Yeah it might be public, but WTH spends time researching neighbors or family that way?!!?!?! That would be a clue to avoid interacting with this person in the future

[Anonymous]

I just say I pay more in total income taxes than I take home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I do. I’m a fed so my salary is already public. I max out my retirement account yearly.

My neighbor knew my mortgage balance one time and he let it slip once. I was surprised by that but I guess that’s public too?

Yes, it is. Go to homes.com

Hmm. I looked up our house and didn’t see our mortgage balance. I see the original loan, which incidentally is incorrect because it says it’s in my name only, but it’s in DH’s name only. The deed shows it’s in our trust now, which is unnerving.

[Anonymous]

I cannot imagine anyone asking, but I they do, I’d say something vague. The only person with whom I had a serous conversation about my finances was my father. And that was in the context of the terms of my will because I have young children.

[Anonymous]

Absolutely not. My ILs are so nosey. When I got an inheritance I briefly considered using my SIL as a lawyer, but my DH freaked out and did not want his family knowing our finances whatsoever.

I'd probably tell someone what I paid for things though, like my house or car or whatever. Those are already purchased, it feels different than asking how much cash I have lying around.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I do. I’m a fed so my salary is already public. I max out my retirement account yearly.

My neighbor knew my mortgage balance one time and he let it slip once. I was surprised by that but I guess that’s public too?

Even if you're a fed, most people won't look it up. These are rude questions, and I deal with them as if they are. Fellow co-workers have asked and I won't answer. No one gets info anymore even how much I paid for my house. That is very easy to look up but I won't do the work for others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I just say I pay more in total income taxes than I take home.

Sux but true. Us W-2 suckers….

[Anonymous]

I say: "that's weird"

Then blankly stare at them until they feel uncomfortable.

One relative responded with "why is that weird" and I shrugged my shoulders and walked away.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'd respond with a laugh and a "why, do you need a loan?" and follow up with "that's not the business I'm in" hahaha and then change the subject.

+1
We don't discuss it. My dad told me how much he's forced to take through minimum distributions, but I think he did so with the intent that I would accept more money from them and let them pay for things. They are so awkward about money, I still won't let them give us money. I already knew they were rich - it doesn't change the family dynamic.

[Anonymous]

No, never asked and if it ever happened, I'd never give specific figures

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nobody has any interest in how much money i make. None of my family or friends wants my money either. It feels weird because I watch Dave Ramsey Show videos and this is a common among the callers.

What is common, callers having relatives who ask? So rude