Are many people over sensitive and selfish these days? Or is this just my impression from here and social media?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Like always, it's personal and not generational or generalizable. I worked with a young man (maybe late 20s early 30s so a young millennial FWIW) and he was terrible at his job, defensive and then basically a crybaby about the criticism.

Meanwhile others in that same cohort are tough, hard workers and have envious maturity.

The newest / younger hires at our office are all quite emotionally fragile. They all seem to have therapists. Most are still tightly tied to mommy & daddy in unhealthy ways.

Mature is the last thing I would call them.

- and meant to add: they are constantly on their phones.

+1000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m old enough to remember when Gen X were considered lazy slackers but now we all walked to school barefoot in the snow, uphill both ways.

lol

I think we were labeled lazy slackers because of the clothes we wore, our music, and lifestyle. Heck, we invented the coffee house lifestyle of killing time drinking coffee—day or night!

Movies like Singles and Reality Bites popularized the slacker label.

But it was an unfair label.

The reality was we were latch key keys who had to sink or swim on our own (or with friends). Overall we were frugal and savvy and more scrappy than subsequent generations because we had to be. We probably experienced more trauma because of our independence (neglect?) yet somehow persevered.

I get this makes you feel good about yourself to think you are describing all Gen X this way, but it's just a bunch of broad stereotypes. I'm gen X, wasn't a latchkey kid. I'm frugal but my sister, also Gen X, is not. I did experience neglect as a kid and I don't think it made me resilient -- I'm resilient in spite if it and would have been better off with loving, supportive parents. This may be your story, but it's not the universal story of Gen X.

And just as the stories people told about us when we were young were unfair, so to are the stories we are telling about young people today.

Sorry, but stereotypes stem from sweeping generalizations (that’s how it works).

Ftr I had a SAHM and loving, well-educated parents. Nonetheless, benign neglect is better than helicopter parents…and therein lies the difference between Gen X and a lot (but not all) of what came next.

Bottom line: a lot of people (regardless of age) simply lack resilience. Couple that with hyper-navel gazing, and you have people who struggle to adult or at the very least are exhausting to deal with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Reading posts on here, and occasionally on Reddit, and it seems like people get anxious and offended more easily and feel justified in making others accommodate their needs in ways that my generation (X) didn’t expect.

Ex’s.
The poster with the waitress teen dd who doesn’t know what to do when boys/men ask for her number. (Not so much that op, but others who claim it’s harassment that the boss needs to fix for her)

(I see lots of this sort of sentiment on Reddit, which I assume trends younger. Everything is harassment, bullying, etc which warrants adult/supervisor intervention)

A law partner colleague who tells me he’s not allowed to mark up a young associate’s work too much, as advised by HR. He says if he marks up their drafts too much, they run to HR.

Thoughts? I want to live in a more careful and kind society, but I think that goes both ways.

It's privilege, and not having any strife or even normality in their lives, so they invent things to "crusade" about and signify their "virtue" for doing so.

[Anonymous]

examples aside, I think in general people are quicker to be upset and people are more selfish. it's a frustrating time.

[Anonymous]

Just an extension of getting participation trophies and all A’s in school that they didn’t deserve.

Everyone thinks they are special when they are not. It is why many firms do their own testing as part of applicant screening to weed out the losers and whiners who can’t take a little constructive criticism.

As for the number, just say jot yours down on the receipt I will get back to you when I have some free time and can get a sitter for the kids.

[Anonymous]

Yep, totally. I also notice people use psychological diagnoses when they don’t make sense. “I have ptsd from being outside yesterday.”

A cashier didn’t want me to unload my groceries behind the person in front of me, and then refused to check me out, claiming she was “holding her boundary.” I literally had to tell her to go get the front end manager. It was insane.

Everything gives everyone anxiety. Nobody has any mental fortitude these days.

[Anonymous]

Yes, OP: you are not wrong.

And while it’s a nationwide problem, the worst of the worst are the people who live around here.

[Anonymous]

There is an increasingly common crisis of mental health at the moment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m Gen X and I thought the mantra of my people was, “Whatever.” Nothing bothers me and I let everything roll off my back and easily move on.

Having said that, I seem to be surrounded by a lot of snowflakes who skew negative, look for drama, and simply aren’t resilient. I find these people to be exhausting. Some of these people are Gen X. I guess they didn’t get the message in the 90s. The worst offenders have a bizarre arrogance fueled by an insecurity that compels them to tear others down. Again: they apparently missed the Gen X orientation.

I am also Gen X, and I wish people like you would start to understand how you are part of the problem.

Look, some people are oversensitive, and yes there is this cultural behavior now where some people are just looking for reasons to be offended. That is annoying. But what you are describing is anti-social, disrespectful behavior. "Whatever" and "get over it" is not a productive philosophy in life. It is likely to create conflict, not turn the page on it. It also entirely driven by ego. You think it's "uncool" to have feelings or care about anything, and that you are superior for just not giving a sh!t.

Have some manners. Care about how your actions impact others and make a good faith effort not to be hurtful. If someone takes offense and you really didn't mean to hurt them, just say you are sorry and you didn't realize. Saying your sorry acknowledges that their experience matters and it's not just about you and your intent. Develop communication skills that enable you to talk about feelings. You don't have to get into all this annoying therapy speak that floats around, you don't have to say crap like "hold space" or whatever. Just have some humility and acknowledge other people exist and matter.

I do get driven up the wall with "cancel culture" and this need to create a million new rules for social interaction all the time, but I find the "whatever" ethics of some gen x'ers as bad or worse. It's just rude. There is a middle ground, that's an extreme position that doesn't really help anything.

I don’t think you really understand the Whatever generation.

It’s not about being rude or arrogant. Quite the opposite.

We were the generation that embraced “Live and let live.” We embraced diversity. We were cool with the lgbt community.

We weren’t fancy or needy.

We worked hard and played hard.

We piled into tiny apartments or group houses. We didn’t expect handouts or a free ride.

When we were stressed, we partied or blasted music in our cars or spent hours talking with friends at coffee houses or bars. Nobody could afford therapy, but we really didn’t need it. We had friends. We talked. We socialized.

And we didn’t complain at work. We weren’t strivers either. We knew the deal: work hard if you want to pay the bills so you can play hard.

I find my Gen X friends and colleagues to be the most grounded people with the biggest hearts and most compassion. We didn’t have cell phones or social media…we had friends. I think we had a better grasp on group dynamics: it wasn’t about us as individuals; it was always about our group (at work, friends, etc.).

How old are you pp? Maybe you aren’t from the same Gen X as the rest of us.

NP. Slow clap for you and if you were the first pp. Agree 100%. I’m honestly shocked by how many GenX are MAGA, which is the opposite of whatever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m old enough to remember when Gen X were considered lazy slackers but now we all walked to school barefoot in the snow, uphill both ways.

lol

I think we were labeled lazy slackers because of the clothes we wore, our music, and lifestyle. Heck, we invented the coffee house lifestyle of killing time drinking coffee—day or night!

Movies like Singles and Reality Bites popularized the slacker label.

But it was an unfair label.

The reality was we were latch key keys who had to sink or swim on our own (or with friends). Overall we were frugal and savvy and more scrappy than subsequent generations because we had to be. We probably experienced more trauma because of our independence (neglect?) yet somehow persevered.

I get this makes you feel good about yourself to think you are describing all Gen X this way, but it's just a bunch of broad stereotypes. I'm gen X, wasn't a latchkey kid. I'm frugal but my sister, also Gen X, is not. I did experience neglect as a kid and I don't think it made me resilient -- I'm resilient in spite if it and would have been better off with loving, supportive parents. This may be your story, but it's not the universal story of Gen X.

And just as the stories people told about us when we were young were unfair, so to are the stories we are telling about young people today.

Sorry, but this is hilarious as it proves OP’s thesis. You’re over sensitive about a generalization. Clearly we’re not a monolith, it’s okay.

[Anonymous]

People only focus on themselves now. Social media is a major, toxic, cause for this.

[Anonymous]

Yes, and it is people in their 20s.
On of the students that I supervised this summer objected to being on site, and then complained to HR when she was asked to come in for 8 AM for a patient/research participant in a clinical trial. It was for one morning.
There were other complaints she made - to the ethics board, and openly during lab meetings with other trainees and research personnel present, but not speaking with me directly.

In a 1-1 meeting, she couldn’t understand why it’s important to speak directly with the supervisor, rather than openly at the lab meeting or going above the supervisor to HR and the ethics board.

I talked to the program and told them she wasn’t a good fit for my lab, and that she was undermining the research and creating a toxic environment. She was gone the next day.

This was a student in her first year of medical school. I have no idea how she will get through medical school, clinical clerkship or residency.

Some of this generation have no social skills and their only response when unhappy is to cancel people.

[Anonymous]

I think most people have become stupid thanks to the internet. I miss the dial up days when it was only for the wealthy nerd.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Reading posts on here, and occasionally on Reddit, and it seems like people get anxious and offended more easily and feel justified in making others accommodate their needs in ways that my generation (X) didn’t expect.

Ex’s.
The poster with the waitress teen dd who doesn’t know what to do when boys/men ask for her number. (Not so much that op, but others who claim it’s harassment that the boss needs to fix for her)

(I see lots of this sort of sentiment on Reddit, which I assume trends younger. Everything is harassment, bullying, etc which warrants adult/supervisor intervention)

A law partner colleague who tells me he’s not allowed to mark up a young associate’s work too much, as advised by HR. He says if he marks up their drafts too much, they run to HR.

Thoughts? I want to live in a more careful and kind society, but I think that goes both ways.

Everyone is gay.

[Anonymous]

The fact you rely on impressions, vibes, social media tells me you are not a reliable reporter of facts.

So you can dream up whatever you want!