Why do teens self-segregate along racial lines ?

[Anonymous]

Not the case for our two children. They have friends of all races... as do I.

Added plus we are in a very diverse city.

[Anonymous]

I see this at my kids’ private school, but financial status has something to do with it also. The wealthier African-American kids integrate and are part of their friend groups. These kids live in the same neighborhoods, attended the same K-8 schools, vacation in the same spots, etc. as the white kids.

The African American kids who I presume are scholarship kids based on their addresses stick together.

I’ve assumed this has more to do with commonalities than race, but maybe I’m wrong.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do you think it's just a teenager thing? I saw this in graduate school--people segregate by race and sometimes by gender. Once someone pointed out that there was the black study group, the Asian study group, the white women study group, and the white women study group.

Wow two white women study groups! White and whiter?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why do you think it's just a teenager thing? I saw this in graduate school--people segregate by race and sometimes by gender. Once someone pointed out that there was the black study group, the Asian study group, the white women study group, and the white women study group.

Wait - there was a study group for white-women? Did they exclude Women of color?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kids attend a school that's 50% hispanic (very few AA) and it's completely divided in racial lines. I have invited the entire class for my kid's birthday parties since K and not one Hispanic kid comes.

I don't think it's parents doing it. I have a pretty diverse group of friends.

My kids school is similar. After years of familiarity I am used to this. Hispanic families do whole-family parties with drinking and so on and they don't want to feel judged by white people. They also don't want to drop their kid off with strangers. After building trust Hispanic moms are willing to do drop off playdates but it takes a LOT of bonding and they want to see how clean your place is. They don't respond to evites but if you send a note home with a personal touch (Larlo talks about Larlito all the time and really hopes he can come) they will show up.
You have to give off a warm vibe and the "I already have plenty of friends" vibe rampant around here is repellant to them.

[Anonymous]

My kid has been attending a school where they are the only child of their race in most classrooms, for the last 4 years. So out of necessity, her friends have all been of other races. Most of the kids do not seem to care about race. However, the school is about 80% one race and some of the kids of this race don't mingle with any of the kids of other races. There is no racist behavior, they just self select into friend groups that are just their race.

Next year my kid will be attending a much more diverse school. No race makes up more than 50% of the school and for the first time, she will have a critical mass of kids of her same race. I am curious to see what happens. She already has three friends at the school -- two are mixed race and one is our race. I don't have specific hopes or expectations, I'm honestly just interested in it as a social experiment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I see this at my kids’ private school, but financial status has something to do with it also. The wealthier African-American kids integrate and are part of their friend groups. These kids live in the same neighborhoods, attended the same K-8 schools, vacation in the same spots, etc. as the white kids.

The African American kids who I presume are scholarship kids based on their addresses stick together.

I’ve assumed this has more to do with commonalities than race, but maybe I’m wrong.

Ok this is pathetic. These children make their friendships based on the ones who vacation in the same spots and live in the same neighborhoods? The lower income Black kids don’t hang out with the higher income Blacks? I think you don’t know what you’re talking about. And you didn’t mention White kids. Do they also choose their friends by vacation spots and financials?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I see this at my kids’ private school, but financial status has something to do with it also. The wealthier African-American kids integrate and are part of their friend groups. These kids live in the same neighborhoods, attended the same K-8 schools, vacation in the same spots, etc. as the white kids.

The African American kids who I presume are scholarship kids based on their addresses stick together.

I’ve assumed this has more to do with commonalities than race, but maybe I’m wrong.

Ok this is pathetic. These children make their friendships based on the ones who vacation in the same spots and live in the same neighborhoods? The lower income Black kids don’t hang out with the higher income Blacks? I think you don’t know what you’re talking about. And you didn’t mention White kids. Do they also choose their friends by vacation spots and financials?

Dp. Finances dictate a lot for kids of all races. Kids do activities or camps together and make friends there. Those friends find each other at school, and build overlapping social circles. But, most of those activities cost money.

Some activities are more diverse than others. Kids in band, for example, will be more diverse because it costs less to rent an instrument. Kids who meetup with other school friends at expensive camps, on the other hand, are going to meet kids whose parents can afford expensive camps.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I see this at my kids’ private school, but financial status has something to do with it also. The wealthier African-American kids integrate and are part of their friend groups. These kids live in the same neighborhoods, attended the same K-8 schools, vacation in the same spots, etc. as the white kids.

The African American kids who I presume are scholarship kids based on their addresses stick together.

I’ve assumed this has more to do with commonalities than race, but maybe I’m wrong.

Ok this is pathetic. These children make their friendships based on the ones who vacation in the same spots and live in the same neighborhoods? The lower income Black kids don’t hang out with the higher income Blacks? I think you don’t know what you’re talking about. And you didn’t mention White kids. Do they also choose their friends by vacation spots and financials?

They don't

There have been threads about this in the Private School forum.

Probably about what is familiar to them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids attend a school that's 50% hispanic (very few AA) and it's completely divided in racial lines. I have invited the entire class for my kid's birthday parties since K and not one Hispanic kid comes.

I don't think it's parents doing it. I have a pretty diverse group of friends.

My kids school is similar. After years of familiarity I am used to this. Hispanic families do whole-family parties with drinking and so on and they don't want to feel judged by white people. They also don't want to drop their kid off with strangers. After building trust Hispanic moms are willing to do drop off playdates but it takes a LOT of bonding and they want to see how clean your place is. They don't respond to evites but if you send a note home with a personal touch (Larlo talks about Larlito all the time and really hopes he can come) they will show up.
You have to give off a warm vibe and the "I already have plenty of friends" vibe rampant around here is repellant to them.

I agree. Especially families who are new to this country. And Latino parties go on forever.

[Anonymous]

DEI created racist children. It was not like this 30 years ago. Thanks woke democrats!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I see this at my kids’ private school, but financial status has something to do with it also. The wealthier African-American kids integrate and are part of their friend groups. These kids live in the same neighborhoods, attended the same K-8 schools, vacation in the same spots, etc. as the white kids.

The African American kids who I presume are scholarship kids based on their addresses stick together.

I’ve assumed this has more to do with commonalities than race, but maybe I’m wrong.

Ok this is pathetic. These children make their friendships based on the ones who vacation in the same spots and live in the same neighborhoods? The lower income Black kids don’t hang out with the higher income Blacks? I think you don’t know what you’re talking about. And you didn’t mention White kids. Do they also choose their friends by vacation spots and financials?

They don't

There have been threads about this in the Private School forum.

Probably about what is familiar to them.

There is so much stereotyping that goes on here I would guess these comments are at least grossly exaggerated. Kids usually become friends with kids they have things in common with. The kids on the football team usually become friends . The kids who spend every day practicing for a play tend to become friends. Kids choose their friends based on who they like.

Any kid over the age of ten whose only friends are based on vacation destination and family income is controlled by a sociopath.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:DEI created racist children. It was not like this 30 years ago. Thanks woke democrats!

Ha! 30 years ago I was in hs and it was this way. POCs have to codeswitch around white people. It's nice to just be yourself sometimes. I'm shocked you don't know this.

[Anonymous]

Mine don’t - Blair

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DEI created racist children. It was not like this 30 years ago. Thanks woke democrats!

Ha! 30 years ago I was in hs and it was this way. POCs have to codeswitch around white people. It's nice to just be yourself sometimes. I'm shocked you don't know this.

Such a ridiculous assertion. I guess saying "ask" instead of "aks" is codeswitching if you say so.