What did your parents push you to do that you are grateful for?

[Anonymous]

My parents were serious about manners, grades, reading, and understanding current events, but generally gave me a ton of leeway on pretty much everything else. They encouraged independence and bravery and sometimes gave me a hard time when they perceived I was being hesitant about trying things - but rarely made me actually stick with something if I didn’t want to.

Some of the things I insist on with my own kids are family dinner every night, manners, and helping out around the house. My older kids have to do a couple of ECs each semester, but they can choose anything that interests them. Summer jobs (or internships, or classes) are non-negotiable.

[Anonymous]

manners & writing thank you notes
treating people equally
not being afraid to speak out
working during summers
good posture

[Anonymous]

Earn a college degree
Have a way to earn a living
Have money in my own name, even if married
Be an active volunteer and be generous with time and money
Be respectful to those in authority
Treat everyone with kindness and dignity
Eat healthily, exercise regularly, don't smoke or take illegal drugs, alcohol only in moderation

[Anonymous]

- Socialize, host, include, show up, and keep growing your network.
- Do favors to others if you can and have no expectation of reciprocity. The universe will reciprocate.
- Cook from scratch, clean every day, do laundry and iron clothes.
- How to pray and be grateful.
- Study every day, even when no homework has been assigned.
- Loyalty and devotion to your family. Make every person in your family succeed.

[Anonymous]

Experiences, memories over materialism
Pick a sport to encourage an active life
Frugality “waste not, want not”
Generosity (time & money) with family & friends

[Anonymous]

My parents pushed me a lot, and not always with things that were worth it to me in the long run.

However, I did appreciate:

Eating dinner together each night
Emphasis on academics and doing your best
Getting my chores done well in order to get an allowance; it gave me a good work ethic
Not letting me spend weeks abroad like my friends in college being lazy; I was supposed to earn my money for books and extra expenses in the summers since they paid for college tuition
They had me solve issues myself like make my own college list with minimal input and it made me very independent and helped eventually with running my own business

[Anonymous]

I wish my parents had pushed me more and encouraged me to find a strength and build on it. They were more hands off, letting me make my own decisions and mistakes, which can be a good approach versus micromanaging, but I think they went too far the other way. I don't mean to criticize them and don't blame them for my mistakes.

I took the same approach with my child and now wish I had been a bit more hands on. Not a helicopter parent but guiding, like many PPs have described.

[Anonymous]

I am very glad Iwasn’t forced to stick with piano.

[Anonymous]

My parents rule was that I always had to be involved in something. It didn't have to be one particular thing, they let me choose, but they wanted me involved in something outside of academics that interested me. I was a girl scout, played clarinet, student council, drama club. I wish they would have pushed for sports--at the time, that would have terrified me but I think there is a lot that can be learned from playing on a team and fostering an appreciation for exercise.

[Anonymous]

Letting me be a free-range kid. Going by myself in the woods, riding my bike all over town, ice skating on frozen ponds. We weren't rich, but I had a great childhood.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My parents didn’t push me to do anything in particular. My mom wanted us to marry rich. That was one piece of advice.

That's stupid.

[Anonymous]

Chores. I did nonstop chores that my younger siblings didn't have to do. As an adult I'm so grateful. My siblings didn't turn out well and it's mostly because they're super disorganized and messy (which is also why my parents couldn't get them to do any chores...)

Eat dinner together as a family every single night.

Despite growing up in a wealthy family, I was never given free access to credit cards and I always had to work. I was an afterschool nanny M-Th and then great internships in the summers.

[Anonymous]

Opposite here.

My parents didn’t want to drive me to travel soccer or volleyball so I never advanced.

When I got to college I did club sports and got a lot of positive comments but still never reached my potential.

Oh well. No I do triathlon with a friend group. That’s all fitness and athletics will be to me.

[Anonymous]

Every Jamaican man I meet is angry his parents didn’t push him to be a well trained sprinter.

[Anonymous]

My parents did not push anything and DH's parents pushed so much. We are both inclined toward over-correction, which puts us at odds. Hopefully our kids turn out okay. Maybe one parent who pushes (to a reasonable degree in my opinion) and one who doesn't will be a good balance for my kids. Both have at times stated they know my nudging helps them to be as successful as they have been in sports, academics, etc. thus far.