Tall women give me advise on how to boost the confidence of my tall baby girl
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Anonymous
| She’s not your baby girl you can start by treating her like an adult. |
Anonymous
| I'm just under 6 feet and get it. I felt similarly as a teen, but did grow into it, so to speak. Part of it was that boys eventually grew too (the difference was greatest in middle school but by college wasn't as dramatic), part of it was learning to appreciate the benefits (sports, weight distribution, etc.), part of it was just gaining self confidence and comfort with being who you are. Hopefully she'll turn the corner soon in terms of viewing it as a positive! |
Anonymous
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In high school I (tall female) remember complaining to my (short female) friend that I wish I was shorter/cute like her. Her response: it may look cute to be short now but middle age short women are not cute. Tall is where it’s at! She really cared about my self esteem and this always stuck with me when I felt self-conscious about my height. I know this seems like it pits tall women against short women, but since it was said to me by a friend, I’ve thought back on it from time to time!
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Anonymous
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As a very petite woman who has the opposite height, but same problem, you just have to learn to love yourself. When your height is an outlier, you need to lean into it being part of your personality. Everyone is always going to refer to me as the short woman or the petite woman when describing me to a stranger. People do the same for tall women: "Larla is the tall woman over there in blue."
Your daughter has to lean into being tall and think of all the reasons it's great. Models are tall, she can eat a lot more food than short people (as a short person I am very jealous of how much taller people eat. Gaining 5lbs looks the same as a tall person gaining 20), tall people are considered more graceful and willowy. |
Anonymous
I'm tall and my mother said some equivalent of this to me without explicitly bagging on short women. She would say you'll be grateful when you're older. She was right. Most women 5-4 and under look pretty dumpy by middle age. Yes, there are exceptions. |
Anonymous
She has not had her period yet so she likely has more growing to do. |
Anonymous
especially at her size |
Anonymous
| My tall daughter found a lovely woman to marry, and she didn't even play basketball. |
Anonymous
...unapologetically tall beautiful and well-dressed women. |
Anonymous
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I am 53 years old and am 5'11". I love my height, but I admit that I had several things that went in my favor:
- I never had a big growth spurt, so I wasn't taller than all of the boys in middle school and High school. I just grew slowly and steadily through age 19. - I have a very slender build, and I have maintained that slender build throughout the years. The world likes tall, slender women (and is sometimes very hard on tall, overweight women). I would suggest a few things for your daughter: - She needs to know her exact height. Is she 5'11" or 6'1" or in between. It isn't hard... stand up straight against a wall, ruler on head, mark spot, and use a measuring tape. Remeasure in several spots until you come to consensus. I have had so many men over the years come up and say something slightly critical like "wow, you're too tall, you must be over 6'4 because I'm 6'1"." I knew my exact height so I could smile and say "nope, I'm only 5'11"" and feel very confident that I had the upper hand. It seems like such a minor thing, but I guarantee that it will make her feel better to know. - Does she have any interest in playing sports. If so, that is a huge, huge confidence booster. Plus, it's a great way to meet people who value height, which will be helpful to her mindset. Good luck to her. |
Anonymous
DP Kindly STFU. Thanks. |
Anonymous
This. I would be more matter of fact about this and avoid indulging much hand wringing about it. She's tall and there's nothing that can be done about it. What's more, being tall is not a disability, so she may not like it, but her tallness doesn't merit much sympathy. So she can spend her time whining about something silly that she can't change, or she can spend her time doing something more productive. And I would put it just about that plainly to her. In my experience, spending a lot of time talking about these things, trying to convince a kid that they are wrong, just makes them obsess more. |
Anonymous
Wow this happens so much from insecure men who have lied about their height their whole lives. I feel seen. Some men will insist too. Insane. |
Anonymous
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I’m tall. I didn’t date in middle school, but men have LOVED dating me in adulthood. Especially men who minded that they were just under 6’. They knew our potential babies would be over that ( unfair) benchmark. Society is really, really rough on men’s height.
I’d see what you can to do to take away all social media. I’m sure that’s a huge factor. Also, once she’s done growing, have a few things tailored. There are stores in Etsy that will take your measurements and make a custom dress or whatever. She’ll feel more confident if her clothes look the way everyone else’s do. I recently bought a custom linen Tshirt, and it’s long enough, which is hard to find right now. |
Anonymous
I am 6 1. My daughter was 6 feet by age 13 and is now 6 2 at 17. We impressed upon her early how awesome it is to be tall. That helped counteract brainwashing. I am not sure what the solution is besides pointing out how models are tall when you see them at this point. But I would say: she can't really wear the cute fashions, whoever said she could wear whatever she wants (I mean she CAN and power to her, but it's unlikely to look good). I've always said we can look elegant and regal and sophistocated and classic, but not cute. And petite women have a hard time pulling that off. |