DS on the fence due to dive team shower situations

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS (8) wants to join the dive team at our pool. However, he's on the fence because the teams here do communal showers. Now the woman's shower room has curtains and privacy, but DS and DH have both confirmed that this is not the case for guys. We've never showered at the pool before, but on the team, a friend of DS's who's done it has said that everyone on the team does it before practice. I'm not sure if it's a team rule per se, but I believe that it may be; in any event, DS would be the odd one out should he opt out. He is very private and seems very anxious about this possibility. I've explained that it's not inappropriate because of the situation, but he still feels that it would be "embarrassing". I don't want him to miss something that could be fun because of this. What should I do?

(Also, please be mindful about what you share, because there unfortunately are some real weirdos out there)

OP again, sorry I made a typo! It's supposed to say that they shower AFTER practice, not before. Sorry for the confusion. lol

It’s very unusual for kids to shower after practice. Most have to get out of there quickly for camps, other activities. Hardly anyone at our pool showers after.

Why do you share this schlock?

1. Most kids don’t go to camp every week. Many do, but not most, and not every week.

2. If you were sending your kid to camp immediately from the pool, wouldn’t you encourage taking a very brief shower to rinse the chlorine off?

When you wear blinders, you shouldn’t paint with such a bold brush.

not the pp but I have 2 year round club swimmers who swim almost every morning before school and no, most kids do not shower after practice before school. Should they to remove chlorine? Probably. But most, at least boys, do not.

OP. I my kids also do summer swim and dive and do not shower at the pool. I find it incredibly odd that the dive team at your pool is all showering together after practice. Seriously never heard of that being the team culture.

I also have year-round club swimmers, that shower at home. However, this is specific to people that need to leave immediately from the pool in order to go to camp, which means there is no time to go home. The choice is to go to camp without removing chlorine, or take a brief shower at the pool.

My kids don’t shower at home either. They just go to school. They shower at night but not between swim practice and school. Yes, they probably should but they and I suspect most kids don’t.

Honestly, that’s gross.

I also hate to break it to you that no one showers before entering the pool either. I Siena a lot of time at pools and never see people shower before swimming. And no they are not showering at home beforehand.

Who care about showering before? Showering after is mostly about getting chlorine out of hair, partially about getting it off the skin.

But why is it gross? I get that it probably isn’t the best thing for skin or hair but it’s no more unhygienic than swimming in a pool in the first place.

[Anonymous]

Are we sure that your son’s presumably 8 year old friend is a reliable source? Not saying it can’t happen, but if the team really does have a rule about showering naked after practice, then I might look into joining a new pool.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS (8) wants to join the dive team at our pool. However, he's on the fence because the teams here do communal showers. Now the woman's shower room has curtains and privacy, but DS and DH have both confirmed that this is not the case for guys. We've never showered at the pool before, but on the team, a friend of DS's who's done it has said that everyone on the team does it before practice. I'm not sure if it's a team rule per se, but I believe that it may be; in any event, DS would be the odd one out should he opt out. He is very private and seems very anxious about this possibility. I've explained that it's not inappropriate because of the situation, but he still feels that it would be "embarrassing". I don't want him to miss something that could be fun because of this. What should I do?

(Also, please be mindful about what you share, because there unfortunately are some real weirdos out there)

OP again, sorry I made a typo! It's supposed to say that they shower AFTER practice, not before. Sorry for the confusion. lol

It’s very unusual for kids to shower after practice. Most have to get out of there quickly for camps, other activities. Hardly anyone at our pool showers after.

Why do you share this schlock?

1. Most kids don’t go to camp every week. Many do, but not most, and not every week.

2. If you were sending your kid to camp immediately from the pool, wouldn’t you encourage taking a very brief shower to rinse the chlorine off?

When you wear blinders, you shouldn’t paint with such a bold brush.

not the pp but I have 2 year round club swimmers who swim almost every morning before school and no, most kids do not shower after practice before school. Should they to remove chlorine? Probably. But most, at least boys, do not.

OP. I my kids also do summer swim and dive and do not shower at the pool. I find it incredibly odd that the dive team at your pool is all showering together after practice. Seriously never heard of that being the team culture.

I also have year-round club swimmers, that shower at home. However, this is specific to people that need to leave immediately from the pool in order to go to camp, which means there is no time to go home. The choice is to go to camp without removing chlorine, or take a brief shower at the pool.

My kids don’t shower at home either. They just go to school. They shower at night but not between swim practice and school. Yes, they probably should but they and I suspect most kids don’t.

Honestly, that’s gross.

I also hate to break it to you that no one showers before entering the pool either. I Siena a lot of time at pools and never see people shower before swimming. And no they are not showering at home beforehand.

Who care about showering before? Showering after is mostly about getting chlorine out of hair, partially about getting it off the skin.

But why is it gross? I get that it probably isn’t the best thing for skin or hair but it’s no more unhygienic than swimming in a pool in the first place.

Google is going to give you the best answer, but chlorine damages hair. You can have chlorine in your hair for 1 hour while swimming and rinse off, or you can have it in your hair for 12 hours. The longer it’s there, the more manage it causes.

This is just hair- I’m not even going to get into chlorine on skin.

But subjectively, nothing to do with hygiene, you don’t smell good after being in the pool. A quick 30 second rinse goes a long way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are we sure that your son’s presumably 8 year old friend is a reliable source? Not saying it can’t happen, but if the team really does have a rule about showering naked after practice, then I might look into joining a new pool.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS (8) wants to join the dive team at our pool. However, he's on the fence because the teams here do communal showers. Now the woman's shower room has curtains and privacy, but DS and DH have both confirmed that this is not the case for guys. We've never showered at the pool before, but on the team, a friend of DS's who's done it has said that everyone on the team does it before practice. I'm not sure if it's a team rule per se, but I believe that it may be; in any event, DS would be the odd one out should he opt out. He is very private and seems very anxious about this possibility. I've explained that it's not inappropriate because of the situation, but he still feels that it would be "embarrassing". I don't want him to miss something that could be fun because of this. What should I do?

(Also, please be mindful about what you share, because there unfortunately are some real weirdos out there)

OP again, sorry I made a typo! It's supposed to say that they shower AFTER practice, not before. Sorry for the confusion. lol

It’s very unusual for kids to shower after practice. Most have to get out of there quickly for camps, other activities. Hardly anyone at our pool showers after.

Why do you share this schlock?

1. Most kids don’t go to camp every week. Many do, but not most, and not every week.

2. If you were sending your kid to camp immediately from the pool, wouldn’t you encourage taking a very brief shower to rinse the chlorine off?

When you wear blinders, you shouldn’t paint with such a bold brush.

not the pp but I have 2 year round club swimmers who swim almost every morning before school and no, most kids do not shower after practice before school. Should they to remove chlorine? Probably. But most, at least boys, do not.

OP. I my kids also do summer swim and dive and do not shower at the pool. I find it incredibly odd that the dive team at your pool is all showering together after practice. Seriously never heard of that being the team culture.

I also have year-round club swimmers, that shower at home. However, this is specific to people that need to leave immediately from the pool in order to go to camp, which means there is no time to go home. The choice is to go to camp without removing chlorine, or take a brief shower at the pool.

My kids don’t shower at home either. They just go to school. They shower at night but not between swim practice and school. Yes, they probably should but they and I suspect most kids don’t.

My kids always shower after morning club practice - they prefer to shower at home, but if they must, they will shower at the pool. They don’t like chlorine lingering, so they never miss a shower after practice. The older one practices 8 times and week and the younger one 5-6 times. It’s a lot of showers.

I would be very surprised that there was a post swim shower requirement. My kids have swam for a few different clubs and pools have pre swim shower requirements for the sake of the pool, but they don’t care what you do afterwards.

[Anonymous]

I think you need to find out the real details. I can understand before practice (most pools do ask for people to shower before going in the water, most people just don’t), but making people shower after practice? What for?

Also most who do shower after practice are in their bathing suits still.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there any chance his friend is trying to pull one over on him?

I had been suspecting this too! However, I asked the dive team reps (as another poster suggested) and apparently it is the norm on this team to shower at the pool after practice (if it weren't awkward for DS I would be applauding the commitment to hygiene!). I would tell him to use the "sorry guys my mom is picking me up" excuse but due to my schedule I won't be able to pick him up for about twenty minutes after practice ends on some days, so that may not work. But I do think that DS is probably not the only kid with this worry, so he won't be alone.

This is honestly the weirdest thing I have ever heard. I can’t imagine our dive team practice ending and everyone heading off to shower together naked. That’s really weird.

Yes, I think the dive team reps may be exaggerating

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think you need to find out the real details. I can understand before practice (most pools do ask for people to shower before going in the water, most people just don’t), but making people shower after practice? What for?

Also most who do shower after practice are in their bathing suits still.

From how OP described i got the sense that it's not a rule so much as the social norm at this particular pool. Hard for me to imagine personally but all pools have different cultures.

[Anonymous]

Pre-Covid my kid would always shower with teammates after swim practice. Suits were always left on. We’d have to drag them out of there afterward as they loved to take their time and mess around with friends in the locker room.

That stopped during Covid and now most kids leave straight after swim/dive.

I think it’s unlikely they are showering nude and it’s totally fine to just leave straight away without changing and say there’s something they need to get back for if he does not want to partake in the shower scene.

[Anonymous]

While it's entirely possible that your child's friend is just pranking him and swim suits stay on during showers, that may not be the case. After all, that seems pretty cruel for a friend if it is causing your DS so much worry. I know if I were a kid I wouldn't prank a friend in a way that made them not participate in a fun activity with me. A lot of younger generations don't have the same hang-ups around bodies (at least not yet), so he may be telling the truth. In this case I would encourage your son to face his fear.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS (8) wants to join the dive team at our pool. However, he's on the fence because the teams here do communal showers. Now the woman's shower room has curtains and privacy, but DS and DH have both confirmed that this is not the case for guys. We've never showered at the pool before, but on the team, a friend of DS's who's done it has said that everyone on the team does it before practice. I'm not sure if it's a team rule per se, but I believe that it may be; in any event, DS would be the odd one out should he opt out. He is very private and seems very anxious about this possibility. I've explained that it's not inappropriate because of the situation, but he still feels that it would be "embarrassing". I don't want him to miss something that could be fun because of this. What should I do?

(Also, please be mindful about what you share, because there unfortunately are some real weirdos out there)

OP again, sorry I made a typo! It's supposed to say that they shower AFTER practice, not before. Sorry for the confusion. lol

It’s very unusual for kids to shower after practice. Most have to get out of there quickly for camps, other activities. Hardly anyone at our pool showers after.

Why do you share this schlock?

1. Most kids don’t go to camp every week. Many do, but not most, and not every week.

2. If you were sending your kid to camp immediately from the pool, wouldn’t you encourage taking a very brief shower to rinse the chlorine off?

When you wear blinders, you shouldn’t paint with such a bold brush.

not the pp but I have 2 year round club swimmers who swim almost every morning before school and no, most kids do not shower after practice before school. Should they to remove chlorine? Probably. But most, at least boys, do not.

OP. I my kids also do summer swim and dive and do not shower at the pool. I find it incredibly odd that the dive team at your pool is all showering together after practice. Seriously never heard of that being the team culture.

I also have year-round club swimmers, that shower at home. However, this is specific to people that need to leave immediately from the pool in order to go to camp, which means there is no time to go home. The choice is to go to camp without removing chlorine, or take a brief shower at the pool.

My kids don’t shower at home either. They just go to school. They shower at night but not between swim practice and school. Yes, they probably should but they and I suspect most kids don’t.

Honestly, that’s gross.

I also hate to break it to you that no one showers before entering the pool either. I Siena a lot of time at pools and never see people shower before swimming. And no they are not showering at home beforehand.

Who care about showering before? Showering after is mostly about getting chlorine out of hair, partially about getting it off the skin.

But why is it gross? I get that it probably isn’t the best thing for skin or hair but it’s no more unhygienic than swimming in a pool in the first place.

Google is going to give you the best answer, but chlorine damages hair. You can have chlorine in your hair for 1 hour while swimming and rinse off, or you can have it in your hair for 12 hours. The longer it’s there, the more manage it causes.

This is just hair- I’m not even going to get into chlorine on skin.

But subjectively, nothing to do with hygiene, you don’t smell good after being in the pool. A quick 30 second rinse goes a long way.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there any chance his friend is trying to pull one over on him?

I had been suspecting this too! However, I asked the dive team reps (as another poster suggested) and apparently it is the norm on this team to shower at the pool after practice (if it weren't awkward for DS I would be applauding the commitment to hygiene!). I would tell him to use the "sorry guys my mom is picking me up" excuse but due to my schedule I won't be able to pick him up for about twenty minutes after practice ends on some days, so that may not work. But I do think that DS is probably not the only kid with this worry, so he won't be alone.

OP again, wanted to clarify that although they did say it's "the norm" I did not get the sense that it's a rule.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is there any chance his friend is trying to pull one over on him?

I had been suspecting this too! However, I asked the dive team reps (as another poster suggested) and apparently it is the norm on this team to shower at the pool after practice (if it weren't awkward for DS I would be applauding the commitment to hygiene!). I would tell him to use the "sorry guys my mom is picking me up" excuse but due to my schedule I won't be able to pick him up for about twenty minutes after practice ends on some days, so that may not work. But I do think that DS is probably not the only kid with this worry, so he won't be alone.

OP again, wanted to clarify that although they did say it's "the norm" I did not get the sense that it's a rule.

The dive reps seem curiously nonchalant about being sensitive to the idea that some kids do not feel comfortable with this. If it were something like, "all the boys play basketball afterwards, and he doesn't want to play", I would give him strategies on how to deal with it and look at it as a learning experience. But this is different. I will probably get flamed for this, but if this was my kid, I would hire a sitter to pick him up on time to avoid the shower situation. It's his body and his privacy. At the age of 8, it would be worth it to make sure he knows that he should never ever feel pressured to undress if that makes him feel uncomfortable and that I will always take his concerns seriously.

And who knows? He might change his mind once he gets to know the other boys, and he might find out that some boys shower in their suits. I still think it's very weird that they are naked afterwards. My then 7 year old always wanted to stay and shower after club swim practice with his friends, because they had fun goofing around, but they were all still in their suits.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DS (8) wants to join the dive team at our pool. However, he's on the fence because the teams here do communal showers. Now the woman's shower room has curtains and privacy, but DS and DH have both confirmed that this is not the case for guys. We've never showered at the pool before, but on the team, a friend of DS's who's done it has said that everyone on the team does it before practice. I'm not sure if it's a team rule per se, but I believe that it may be; in any event, DS would be the odd one out should he opt out. He is very private and seems very anxious about this possibility. I've explained that it's not inappropriate because of the situation, but he still feels that it would be "embarrassing". I don't want him to miss something that could be fun because of this. What should I do?

(Also, please be mindful about what you share, because there unfortunately are some real weirdos out there)

OP again, sorry I made a typo! It's supposed to say that they shower AFTER practice, not before. Sorry for the confusion. lol

It’s very unusual for kids to shower after practice. Most have to get out of there quickly for camps, other activities. Hardly anyone at our pool showers after.

Why do you share this schlock?

1. Most kids don’t go to camp every week. Many do, but not most, and not every week.

2. If you were sending your kid to camp immediately from the pool, wouldn’t you encourage taking a very brief shower to rinse the chlorine off?

When you wear blinders, you shouldn’t paint with such a bold brush.

not the pp but I have 2 year round club swimmers who swim almost every morning before school and no, most kids do not shower after practice before school. Should they to remove chlorine? Probably. But most, at least boys, do not.

OP. I my kids also do summer swim and dive and do not shower at the pool. I find it incredibly odd that the dive team at your pool is all showering together after practice. Seriously never heard of that being the team culture.

I also have year-round club swimmers, that shower at home. However, this is specific to people that need to leave immediately from the pool in order to go to camp, which means there is no time to go home. The choice is to go to camp without removing chlorine, or take a brief shower at the pool.

My kids don’t shower at home either. They just go to school. They shower at night but not between swim practice and school. Yes, they probably should but they and I suspect most kids don’t.

Honestly, that’s gross.

I also hate to break it to you that no one showers before entering the pool either. I Siena a lot of time at pools and never see people shower before swimming. And no they are not showering at home beforehand.

Who care about showering before? Showering after is mostly about getting chlorine out of hair, partially about getting it off the skin.

But why is it gross? I get that it probably isn’t the best thing for skin or hair but it’s no more unhygienic than swimming in a pool in the first place.

Google is going to give you the best answer, but chlorine damages hair. You can have chlorine in your hair for 1 hour while swimming and rinse off, or you can have it in your hair for 12 hours. The longer it’s there, the more manage it causes.

This is just hair- I’m not even going to get into chlorine on skin.

But subjectively, nothing to do with hygiene, you don’t smell good after being in the pool. A quick 30 second rinse goes a long way.

Team kids wear caps. An hour is fine. My kid has long hair and never Ann issue.

[Anonymous]

I don't know why everyone's acting like it's so bizarre for them to undress before taking showers. I mean it's not common, but different people and places have different levels of tolerance for nudity, and what OP is describing certainly wouldn't be unheard of, at least not where I live.