Knowing when you're *done* having kids

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Honest question … how do you afford to send 3-4 kids to college?

I don’t understand this argument, childcare is as expensive (or more) as college now. Atleast with college you have decades to save.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How did you know when you were done having children? We always wanted three, have three, and it's certainly busy enough that I'm not sure I'd have energy for a fourth and I'm probably too old. But I'm having a hard time giving away baby items... "just in case." And every time I look at our third, the baby, I feel this sense of mourning about it being the last time I have a baby this little. But I know that I'm getting older, and my husband and I need our energy for our three beautiful existing children... How did you *know*?

I’m not sure I’ll ever really know. I am in the same boat: three great kids and feel maxed out with money/attention/our both being able to work. But I still *long* for a little baby again. I think what helps me think through it logically is that I really only want another BABY, not really the whole toddler/kid/future unknown state. Some of us just love babies and will probably want to have another one until we physically can’t. Something to think about. Hugs OP, I get it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How did you know when you were done having children? We always wanted three, have three, and it's certainly busy enough that I'm not sure I'd have energy for a fourth and I'm probably too old. But I'm having a hard time giving away baby items... "just in case." And every time I look at our third, the baby, I feel this sense of mourning about it being the last time I have a baby this little. But I know that I'm getting older, and my husband and I need our energy for our three beautiful existing children... How did you *know*?

Same OP! I have three and always wanted three. Two years after having a third I started thinking of having a fourth (had never considered having a fourth before). What makes me know that I’m done? I realized practically speaking we can’t handle more than 3. We both work full time, and are stretched to the max financially. More importantly we are exhausted and my DH has developed major medical issues. So even though I don’t want to be done, practically it makes the most sense. Perhaps if I had started having kids earlier I would have time and energy for a 4th but I did not

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honest question … how do you afford to send 3-4 kids to college?

I don’t understand this argument, childcare is as expensive (or more) as college now. Atleast with college you have decades to save.

Childcare is like 25-40k a year...college is around 90k a year now