A standard custody agreement will list (among many other things) the childrens medical conditions in a section that states each parent must follow all medical directives re these conditions. A standard custody agreement will also outline who will pay for the health insurance premiums as well as expenses and indicate at what $$ amount one parent needs to consult w the other parent about med expenses. Check out Custody Exchange, sign up for a membership and go through the whole flow it takes you through to develop a custody agreement/parenting plan. Your mind will likely be put at ease with how detailed it is. |
I agree with the above 100 percent
The problem is that a lot of middle aged people get temporary mental illness during the end of their marriage. Anyone should be able to research and make a list of their personal property and online accounts. See sentence above re: why they struggle with creating that list. |
It’s best to let things settle down and then get divorced otherwise it’s like trying to get a toddler to put on their shoe. But the tantrum take two years |
Why do you need life insurance for the children? You mean life insurance for the adults with beneficiaries being the kids? |
Who is this advice for? The injured spouse? I don’t see the rush and agree I need to process the hurt my spouse caused me with the betrayal. But he’s in such a rush and thinks we can get this done in a few months. I feel like I’m not ready yet to be rational and will throw a lot of money away on lawyer fees for stuff that’s better worked out in therapy. |
He wants to move on with the AP. You don’t see the rush but he does. |
If so, she holds the cards. Slow it down. Fire your lawyer for a while/ Having multiple divorce lawyers - That is super common |
If you do not trust the advice you are receiving and have to seek legal terms here then certainlyyou can get another attorney.
Go find another attorney, and once hired, that attorney will contact your current attorney. He can make arrangements for the one to withdraw and the other to take her place. They send all the files. This is typical in this type of law. You are under no obligation to employ a certain attorney, so if you want to replace that attorney, then by all means go for it. |
I would try using mediation. Why give lawyers thousands of dollars. |
What do you plan on providing financially? |
Yup. Have seen college funds and retirements, of which you are owed half during time of marriage, drained. 529 was intended for college and then redirected to private school for next family. Have seen agreement to give up retirement portion due forged. |
Exactly. If he wants out quick he’s either got to make an offer I can’t refuse or be willing to take some punches along the way. If he wants something more reasonable he should let his balls cool off while my anger does. |
Pp. sorry OP for not sticking to topic! I’m going to give your original question some thought. |
OP here
To clarify, I’m not the only person commenting on here mid-divorce, so there are a bunch of us in the same shitty position with different needs and I’m so happy we’ve found each other! In my case, it’s going to be very complex and very contingent on my having really thought through the scenario properly. There’s no outright mental illness (just some narcissism) but there are a lot of complicating factors including kids with medical conditions, APs, prenup, hard to value assets, dramatic family members, future inheritance and self-employed parties. I’m also the type of person who will be fixating and flogging myself years later for missing something important like not putting in writing who gets thanksgiving or some minutiae along those lines. |
Perhaps you also need a financial advisor consultation if there are complex issues who works with such situations as an attorney may not be versed in such aspects. |