What's your judgmental relationship opinion?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you’re dating or in a new relationship immediately post separation, you’ve done zero work on yourself. I don’t care that “the marriage was over a long time ago.”

You clearly have not been in a bad marriage. I waited until I divorced to date and in hindsight, I wasted 2 years when separated when I could have been dating. I had not been intimate or in a relationship with my spouse for 7 years by the time the divorce was final at age 42.

I'm the PP. In the middle of a divorce now, so you're wrong. I'm not saying you needed to wait 2 years, but waiting a few weeks or months post separation is not a bad idea and it's my judgy thing, so it's fine if you disagree.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Come on, tell us...what's your judgy-est, snobbiest thought about relationships?

Mine is that I've never met a marriage between high school sweethearts that I'm jealous of.

NP. I agree, but then I realize I've never met any marriage I'm jealous of. 😕

Here's my judgiest thought. I know several white women who date/marry only black men, and they've told me they just think black men have an "edge" to them -- a version of the classic bad boy fetish. Which actually means all these white women are quite racist (!) since they think black man = bad boy.

Now do white men and Asian women ...lol
I too can't stand the couples who have to chat on speakerphone. I guarantee at least one of them has zero interest in the conversation.
One lady who had been with her husband since high school was telling me how great it was that they grew up together and are basically the same person and to me that sounds...kind of lame. My husband is very different from me but that keeps things sort of fresh. We always have a lot to talk about.
My sister and her husband do not share a language. They are both conversational level in each other's language. I have no idea how that relationship can work because so much nuance would be missing. They seem happy though.

[Anonymous]

I'm judgy about married couples that maintain separate finances.

[Anonymous]

More men should grow a pair and refuse to go to therapy.

[Anonymous]

Prime age for marriage is 30-35.

[Anonymous]

A cheater is a cheater, period. People don't change, but you'll never fully trust a cheater, even if they do.

Men are generally selfish, and as a woman, you should take care of yourself as no one else is looking out for you.

[Anonymous]

I think women who are still happily married after 20+ years are just wilfully ignoring their partner's flaws to be happy. I can't understand it. But none of the marriages in my extended family are or were happy so I clearly don't know anything.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most men shouldn't get married.

They like the idea of marriage and kids, but most aren't willing to put in the work.

I work with a lot of 20s/early 30s guys and they all want a wife who is hot, will "build an empire" with them, let them travel as much as they want, do whatever they want, and will accompany them when requested.

After one of these guys said he wants a wife who will co-found a business with him that would require extensive travel from both, I asked who would raise their kids. He replied "I never thought of that. I guess we'll just make enough money that we can hire people to stay with the kids".

Sadly this seems to be the attitude most men have. I want this, I want that, me me me, kids and wife have to suck it up. Men like that have zero business getting married or reproducing.

+1000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Women who say they want marriage and children but then keep dating the same guy for 5+ years.
I don’t have any kind of moral issue with it. I just think it’s stupid and don’t want to talk about it.

Please, it's my nightmare with DD. She's been dating her bf for five years. If nothing is going to come of it, I don't want her wasting her prime dating years.

[Anonymous]

Women who call their DH hubs or hubby.

Men who call their wife babe or my old lady.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I judge when people post Happy Anniversary, Happy Birthday, or Happy Mother's/Father's Day posts on social media. YOU LIVE WITH YOUR SPOUSE - JUST TELL THEM IN REAL PERSON. I am totally judging you for the fact that you need external validation of how great your marriage/spouse is. It's pathetic.

Agreed. I think that most people posting these messages feel very insecure in their marriages. Or they are cheating and trying to hide it.

[Anonymous]

I think people who "stay married for the kids" are incredibly selfish. They are delusional to think it's not harmful to force their kids to be raised in a bad marriage and then divorce once the youngest is out of the house.

[Anonymous]

People who complain to friends and have lots of angst, yet still stay with the person who is causing the stress .

[Anonymous]

I love HS sweethearts and think it’s super cute!

I agree on “staying for the kids”. Most often the woman just doesn’t want to get a job and have to stand in her own. It’s easier to stay in a marriage with someone you hate if you just look at them as a pay cheque.

[Anonymous]

Men and women who claim they want a family.

The men want sex and the women want kids.

This is every unhappy married couple.