Teen DD wants a new dress for every nice occasion

[Anonymous]

It's fun to want things. It's unreasonable to get everything you want. Kids these days are really into the environment - try pointing out how bad rampant consumerism is for it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's fun to want things. It's unreasonable to get everything you want. Kids these days are really into the environment - try pointing out how bad rampant consumerism is for it.

Oh, and point out she can trade with her friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well, you allow your daughter to post pics of herself in dresses so this can hardly seem as shocking as you're making it out to be.

How many 17 year olds do you know not posting things? Just curious. I don’t know any.

My 17yo DD has no social media accounts.

She will occasionally scroll through a friend’s Instagram follows, or watch a TikTok someone sends her, but doesn’t have her own accounts. She has zero desire to post photos or videos of herself everywhere. I don’t know why, but she’s just not that kid.

I would honestly find that concerning.

NP. Then you have a problem. Not everyone feels the need to document and perform life; some of us live it. It’s very sad that PP’s teenager has the wisdom to live and enjoy life rather than curate and perform it online, and you don’t. How old are you?

+1

[Anonymous]

How is a dress worn six months ago, in summer, appropriate to wear now? You said every occasion but this is pretty rare.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well, you allow your daughter to post pics of herself in dresses so this can hardly seem as shocking as you're making it out to be.

How many 17 year olds do you know not posting things? Just curious. I don’t know any.

Mine doesn’t post herself in a way meant to show off her clothes or OOTD. She posts a lot of sunsets and other nature pics, and food she makes mostly.

[Anonymous]

Yup it’s a thing. My 17 yo DD is the same way.

[Anonymous]

Try Poshmark and similar sites. There are always people reselling Hello Molly, Lucy in the Sky, Princess Polly and other teen favorites. She can also reposh after she wears it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Well, you allow your daughter to post pics of herself in dresses so this can hardly seem as shocking as you're making it out to be.

How many 17 year olds do you know not posting things? Just curious. I don’t know any.

My 17yo DD has no social media accounts.

She will occasionally scroll through a friend’s Instagram follows, or watch a TikTok someone sends her, but doesn’t have her own accounts. She has zero desire to post photos or videos of herself everywhere. I don’t know why, but she’s just not that kid.

I would honestly find that concerning.

Genuinely, why?

She has a circle of good friends, she cares about her clothes and has a well-honed sense of personal style, and her day is packed with advanced classes and extracurricular activities.

She reads print and online newspapers to keep up with local and world events. She loves old movies and independent films, museums, used bookstores, and vintage vinyl.

She reads as much as she can find the time for, especially classic novels. She doesn’t leave the house without a book in her bag.

She has an extremely full life, she just doesn’t see a need to live it through social media. I honestly can’t understand why you think this is concerning.

Tell me, what do you think I’m missing as a parent?

[Anonymous]

If Princess Kate can re-wear dresses to events while getting a million pictures taken of her, and blasted all over news, she can re-wear dresses too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Try Poshmark and similar sites. There are always people reselling Hello Molly, Lucy in the Sky, Princess Polly and other teen favorites. She can also reposh after she wears it.

Yes, I am surprised at some reactions here. I think it's all pretty normal, and many many girls (mine included) buy second-hand.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. She is willing to buy some of the dresses herself. She has a PT job. I told her it was her choice but I think it’s wasteful. She wore the dress once to a family event 6 months ago (but posted it) and now this is a school event coming up.

You wore the same dresses to fall and spring formals as a teen? Not the norm!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If Princess Kate can re-wear dresses to events while getting a million pictures taken of her, and blasted all over news, she can re-wear dresses too.

That's a faulty analogy. Kate attends hundreds of events a year. Your kid attends... 2 or 3?

[Anonymous]

My daughter and her friends all trade and thrift dresses to avoid this.

I’ll say not wanting to be seen in a dress she’d already posted in was a phase in high school. She’s in college now and it’s not an issue anymore.

Being a teen is tough. Talk to her about your concerns re finances and sustainability and work on solutions with her to address your concerns, but don’t shut her down completely. Even if you think it’s silly, she needs that dialogue with you and feel that you aren’t minimizing what feels important to her.

[Anonymous]

Me too kid. Me too.

[Anonymous]

Come on op. I was in high school in the early 90s. You didn’t wear a dress twice back then either. We might borrow from a friend, but not wearing the same dress to two homecomings or proms if the same people are there.