How many families with SN kids do you know?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Do their kids seem so different than the kids you grew up with?

Not really. I don’t recall ever knowing any kids who displayed anxiety, depression, attention deficit or autistic behavior in my childhood or teen years. I became familiar with them only after moving to US.

Because they weren’t raised by screens.

Ah, so my kid has ADHD because of screens.

FP. Screens sure make my ADHD kids worse. And make my undiagnosed-ADHD DH worse. And make NT me worse.

[Anonymous]

Those kids were sent to a special school in the old country. I think there was less stress as nobody was without a job or home or money.
Nobody was pushing their kids to become someone and keep up with the high achievers.
Most kids were outside all day long and exhausted by the time they made it back home. Junk food didn't exist and tv showed on three cartoons a day.
OP, if you go back now, almost every kid has a something happening to them. Lots of cutting, anxiety, allergies, kids are heavy, stressed about school, future, money, health.

[Anonymous]

I belong to an organization that started 75 years ago by parents of kids with disabilities. At that time, they weren't welcomed in schools. The kids stayed home or were institutionalized. Parents were lobbying lawmakers for school accessibility. Once they achieved the IDEA they switched to providing arts therapies to kids since our kids weren't welcome in mainstream after school activities.

So this is not new.

[Anonymous]

I grew up in a different country and knew none but that was because people had kids really young so any conditions that are associated with advanced parental age weren’t present. But it was also because medicine was bad so anyone with a severe health condition was less likely to make it and also because of cultural attitudes, people would often abandon those children in orphanages. That’s not great!

This said, I have two kids - teen and tween, and only know one child with a severe discount and three with mild one. (Tho for all I know, some of my kids’ friends have some disability that they are either medicated or accommodated for - if it’s not severe, how would I know?)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I grew up in a different country and knew none but that was because people had kids really young so any conditions that are associated with advanced parental age weren’t present. But it was also because medicine was bad so anyone with a severe health condition was less likely to make it and also because of cultural attitudes, people would often abandon those children in orphanages. That’s not great!

This said, I have two kids - teen and tween, and only know one child with a severe discount and three with mild one. (Tho for all I know, some of my kids’ friends have some disability that they are either medicated or accommodated for - if it’s not severe, how would I know?)

Disability not discount.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Those kids were sent to a special school in the old country. I think there was less stress as nobody was without a job or home or money.
Nobody was pushing their kids to become someone and keep up with the high achievers.
Most kids were outside all day long and exhausted by the time they made it back home. Junk food didn't exist and tv showed on three cartoons a day.
OP, if you go back now, almost every kid has a something happening to them. Lots of cutting, anxiety, allergies, kids are heavy, stressed about school, future, money, health.

So you want my kid with ADHD and dyslexia to go to a special school because god forbid she’s in school with your kid and tries to “become someone and keep up with high achievers.”

You’re absolutely disgusting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I grew up in a different country and knew none but that was because people had kids really young so any conditions that are associated with advanced parental age weren’t present. But it was also because medicine was bad so anyone with a severe health condition was less likely to make it and also because of cultural attitudes, people would often abandon those children in orphanages. That’s not great!

This said, I have two kids - teen and tween, and only know one child with a severe discount and three with mild one. (Tho for all I know, some of my kids’ friends have some disability that they are either medicated or accommodated for - if it’s not severe, how would I know?)

+1

We have kids at very old ages these days.

Also fwiw I was born in another country. I was very depressed as a child, my mother suffered from severe anxiety as a child and my dad and I are probably on the spectrum. My brother and I both have apparent executive function deficits. None of us were diagnosed as children, and neither my dad nor I are likely to get an ASD diagnosis at all. But DD, who takes after all of us in different ways, has an ASD, anxiety and executive dysfunction diagnoses.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:More people make the effort to seek a diagnosis and they get it. Do you know of any child specifically tested that was not handed some type of diagnosis?

Yes. I do. But I will also add that this type of testing is around $5000 so most people don’t incur that sort of expense unless their child is struggling significantly. So it makes sense that most kids who are tested do have a diagnosis.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m an immigrant and when I lived in my country in my entire life I encountered only one family with a SN kid.

I’ve lived in America for over twenty years and it occurred to me recently I know so many families with SN kids:

- one family where DS is very autistic and DD with ADHD and depression and anxiety,
- 2 families with kids with cerebral palsy, - one family where DS has ADHD and DD with depression,
- one family with DD with ADHD
- one family with one DD with anxiety disorder and another with speech issues

I practically don’t know any friends without kids with diagnosis.

Is it American society that is so sickly?

Or is it just the modern society that is so sickly? I don’t hear about such issues in my home country. Do you?

What country are you from?

in many countries SN kids and those with disabilities are cast away, thrown in orphanages and not a part of society.

[Anonymous]

My tween nephew in South America would have some kind of diagnosis if he lived in the US. Probably ASD. His mom doesn’t work outside the home and is constantly helping him when he’s not in school. He has lots of accommodations, they just don’t call it that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:More people make the effort to seek a diagnosis and they get it. Do you know of any child specifically tested that was not handed some type of diagnosis?

Yes. I do. But I will also add that this type of testing is around $5000 so most people don’t incur that sort of expense unless their child is struggling significantly. So it makes sense that most kids who are tested do have a diagnosis.

+1 We would never have sought an eval if two different therapists hadn't strongly recommended it. It's bizarre to me when people suggest these diagnoses are fake.

If a parent is seeking an eval it's because something is going on. The evaluator isn't just going to diagnose ADHD or ASD though. Many on these boards and friends IRL have gotten anxiety diagnoses but no ADHD or ASD. Studies show about 1 in 5 kids meet the criteria for an anxiety disorder so it shouldn't be surprising if an evaluator finds that. It doesn't necessarily mean the kid will get put on meds.

[Anonymous]

We lived in a country in Asia (which one doesn’t matter) when my kids were in elementary school.

At times the city level government officials over education would visit the school. Any kids who didn’t meet the standards, whether behaviorally or academically, were told to stay home that day. My co-worker, native to the country, always had to keep her son home during official visits. He most likely had pretty severe ADHD.

[Anonymous]

Well an observation from reading DCUM is OPs post about their SN kids then somewhere along the thread turns out the father or other family members are non NT also. Hmmm.

Maybe in past eras these men did not marry or become fathers?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As the mom of a kid with ADHD and dyslexia, this conversation is ick.

OP, you likely just didn’t know those kids because they weren’t being diagnosed or they were pulled out of mainstream school. They still existed.

+1
My dh is from a country where there are still very few things diagnosed. After having a neurodiverse child, when we go visit his family, I realize how many people there (including in dh’s family) tick every box for being on the spectrum or severe adhd but were never diagnosed. I doubt our rates of incidence are higher, it’s just that we actually diagnose things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:[Studies show about 1 in 5 kids meet the criteria for an anxiety disorder so it shouldn't be surprising if an evaluator finds that.

Don’t you think it’s crazy that 1/5 kids have anxiety disorders? And how many have depression and ADHD?

There is something wrong with the way we live.