Is it normal for moms to post every playdate and social gathering on social media?

[Anonymous]

No

[Anonymous]

How old are you and how much free time do you have that you monitor who posts what about what, when? It’s odd to me that you have the time and bandwidth to notice what other people are doing on social media. Do you take notes? I’m on Facebook maybe once or twice a week, and I throw a few Likes at kid pics, but I don’t notice or care if it’s from a play date or a family trip to the pumpkin patch or whatever.

[Anonymous]

I do think this is very strange. At my kids’ last school we had a great parent community and it felt like we were always bumping into people at the playground or going to birthday parties or meeting up for school events. To my knowledge nobody posted anything online, aside from a birthday party post or something. I wouldn’t have been comfortable with that and would have found it very bazaar.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know one mom who shares everything on social media and it doesn't read to me at all like bragging, it's just kind of sad and seems lonely. There are like 20 pictures every day of her 8yo, their every move is documented, it's really weird to me.

Same and I know behind the scenes everything is not what she portrays on social media. I’m really turned off by people who need validation through social media

[Anonymous]

I know someone that does this and it seems like she’s desperate to prove her kid has friends and that she does. It’s insecurity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How old are you and how much free time do you have that you monitor who posts what about what, when? It’s odd to me that you have the time and bandwidth to notice what other people are doing on social media. Do you take notes? I’m on Facebook maybe once or twice a week, and I throw a few Likes at kid pics, but I don’t notice or care if it’s from a play date or a family trip to the pumpkin patch or whatever.

NP wow you are annoying. I log into ig maybe once a day while I'm in line or something and yes I would notice if my feed was absolutely filled with the same person posting pictures of playdates. Do you feel better that you said this? Honestly you just sound weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I know a group like this. They are basically an adult sorority with lots of infighting and drama among both the moms and the kids. The Halloween group photo may look enviable to some but it's a mess. They also all drink to get drunk pretty much every time they gather.

Yes, this has been my experience as well. I noped out of events with them once I realized, though I still do host the kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How old are you and how much free time do you have that you monitor who posts what about what, when? It’s odd to me that you have the time and bandwidth to notice what other people are doing on social media. Do you take notes? I’m on Facebook maybe once or twice a week, and I throw a few Likes at kid pics, but I don’t notice or care if it’s from a play date or a family trip to the pumpkin patch or whatever.

NP wow you are annoying. I log into ig maybe once a day while I'm in line or something and yes I would notice if my feed was absolutely filled with the same person posting pictures of playdates. Do you feel better that you said this? Honestly you just sound weird.

OK, be sure to write about me in the journal you keep to track who posts what, when. Add me as a data point to your Observation Matrix.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know one mom who shares everything on social media and it doesn't read to me at all like bragging, it's just kind of sad and seems lonely. There are like 20 pictures every day of her 8yo, their every move is documented, it's really weird to me.

It may be for family long distance or other reasons.

I've never understood this. I just text those people pictures. If I care about you seeing DS enough to post about it, I probably have your number and communicate with you via phone.

We live in an area that is far from where my.husband and I grew up. We also moved a lot in our 20s and 30s so our friends and family are scattered across the country and the world. I post frequently in my Instagram stories (my kids not other people's kids unless I have permission) which disappear after 24 hrs. I can see that alot of people that I wouldn't bother to text my kids first day of school or Halloween costume looking, commenting, messaging me about my posts. If they didn't want to see it they didn't need to click into my stories. And many of these people have empty profiles and never post but they regularly view. I love seeing my friends kids and their adventures and it's kept me connected to so many people that I am not able to see in person frequently.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know one mom who shares everything on social media and it doesn't read to me at all like bragging, it's just kind of sad and seems lonely. There are like 20 pictures every day of her 8yo, their every move is documented, it's really weird to me.

It may be for family long distance or other reasons.

I've never understood this. I just text those people pictures. If I care about you seeing DS enough to post about it, I probably have your number and communicate with you via phone.

We live in an area that is far from where my.husband and I grew up. We also moved a lot in our 20s and 30s so our friends and family are scattered across the country and the world. I post frequently in my Instagram stories (my kids not other people's kids unless I have permission) which disappear after 24 hrs. I can see that alot of people that I wouldn't bother to text my kids first day of school or Halloween costume looking, commenting, messaging me about my posts. If they didn't want to see it they didn't need to click into my stories. And many of these people have empty profiles and never post but they regularly view. I love seeing my friends kids and their adventures and it's kept me connected to so many people that I am not able to see in person frequently.

What you are talking about are parasocial relationships. They may fluff up your ego, but they are not real.

[Anonymous]

Well there's two things going on here:

1. Some moms do frequently post on social media. I don't know if it's considered normal but I see it happen. Why they do that who knows? Maybe it's for validation, attention, maybe they like to share but if it's impacting you in a negative manner (which does happen) then you need to stop following them or not look at their posts

2. Some families like to socialize a lot! They are planners, organizers and enjoy hosting. Or they themselves have a large group of friends that like to get together. They may have kids that love playdates. But there are just as many families that like to focus on family time, have kids that are fine playing on their own or with siblings, limit activities and generally choose to spend their time, energy and money on other things. Both are ok. You just have to figure out what works best for your family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I know one mom who shares everything on social media and it doesn't read to me at all like bragging, it's just kind of sad and seems lonely. There are like 20 pictures every day of her 8yo, their every move is documented, it's really weird to me.

It may be for family long distance or other reasons.

I've never understood this. I just text those people pictures. If I care about you seeing DS enough to post about it, I probably have your number and communicate with you via phone.

We live in an area that is far from where my.husband and I grew up. We also moved a lot in our 20s and 30s so our friends and family are scattered across the country and the world. I post frequently in my Instagram stories (my kids not other people's kids unless I have permission) which disappear after 24 hrs. I can see that alot of people that I wouldn't bother to text my kids first day of school or Halloween costume looking, commenting, messaging me about my posts. If they didn't want to see it they didn't need to click into my stories. And many of these people have empty profiles and never post but they regularly view. I love seeing my friends kids and their adventures and it's kept me connected to so many people that I am not able to see in person frequently.

What you are talking about are parasocial relationships. They may fluff up your ego, but they are not real.

How would you know that? When we're in town they want to see us or they ask to visit. My husband's family send gifts and birthday messages to my kids. They respond to my messages or calls.

[Anonymous]

I know a few moms like this. One has a horrible marriage and one is newly divorced and clearly struggling to find her way.
Both strike me as sort of desperate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How old are you and how much free time do you have that you monitor who posts what about what, when? It’s odd to me that you have the time and bandwidth to notice what other people are doing on social media. Do you take notes? I’m on Facebook maybe once or twice a week, and I throw a few Likes at kid pics, but I don’t notice or care if it’s from a play date or a family trip to the pumpkin patch or whatever.

NP wow you are annoying. I log into ig maybe once a day while I'm in line or something and yes I would notice if my feed was absolutely filled with the same person posting pictures of playdates. Do you feel better that you said this? Honestly you just sound weird.

OK, be sure to write about me in the journal you keep to track who posts what, when. Add me as a data point to your Observation Matrix.

What is wrong with you?

[Anonymous]

Do they have actual jobs? Or are they the mocha and munch crew?