Back to school night -- parents only?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Call and ask the school.

Some schools specifically state that back-to-school night is for parents only. Bringing children to an event that is parents only is rude. Would you also bring them to a wedding which said "no children" just because you didn't want to find a sitter? Do you take them to work with you?

Either leave them with your husband, hire a sitter, or ask a friend to take care of them for a couple of hours. Or don't go. But, if you're going to start the year by deliberately flouting stated school policies, your children are destined to be discipline cases.

Yes, dry teated hag. You the boss of me and all the undisciplined flouters. Flatten us under your brown sensible heel.

What are you, 13? What a surprise that your life is so undisciplined that you can't even find childcare for one event. You can't even control your emotions on an anonymous forum.

BTW, I prefer Prada mules with a kitten heel.

[Anonymous]

You can solve the problem the way my parents did. They never went to back-to-school nights or teacher conferences or any of the time suck we now consider essential. If we got good grades everything was fine. If we didn't, then WE, not our teachers had some explaining to do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Imagine if every parent brought their kids with them. Do you really expect that the school can provide care for every student plus who knows how many older or younger siblings? It's just not possible. The whole back to school night takes less than 2 hours. Find a sitter, neighbor, family member, etc to watch your kid.

FWI, in my son's school, a lot of the parents brought children and their siblings. More than half the class, actually. The kids were well behaved and sat with their parents. It wasn't impossible at all. This was in Prince George's County.

[Anonymous]

My DH and I split back-to-school night duty; one of us goes and the other stays at home with the kids. It is really not hard.

Last year I went to back-to-school night and missed out on certain information because of noise and disruptions created by children who should not have been there to begin with.

Sorry, no sympathy here. You can switch off with your spouse, or not go. But don't disrupt the experience for others who have planned ahead in order to attend without children.


How lucky you are to have a partner to share these responsibilities with. But you do realize there are plenty of single parents who have nobody to help them. They don't have money for a sitter since they spent what they had on before and after school care. Maybe these parents want to go for the same reasons you do. They care about their kids' education as much as you do. I could plan a month in advance and I still wouldn't have the money to pay a babysitter. My DD is in second grade so I doubt she will "disrupt the experience" for you. Count your blessings.

[Anonymous]

I've got three kids, two of them special needs. Even though I have a DH, between our work requirements, therapy appointments and finances, it's very difficult for both of us to attend school events. We're lucky if one of us can go - which makes it very hard because on back to school night, we have to hit at least 5 classrooms (3 general ed, 2 special ed) in the very short time we're alloted. This year at the open house we had to find 6 teachers in an hour. We didn't have time to even find the OT and ST that also work with our kids. I'll never forget our very first back to school night - one couple brought their child with them. He was in a play area the opposite side of the room as his parents. We were on the same side he was and he was so noisy that we couldn't hear what the teacher was saying. I finally told him he either needed to play quiety or go sit with his parents but by that time there wasn't much left for the teacher to say. I don't know how his parents couldn't have noticed how disruptive he was.

I understand not chosing to spend the money on a babysitter or asking a neighbor for assistance (what are neighbors for?) during the 2 hours of back to school night - you could even find a middle/high school student that has community service requirements. But, if you bring your children to back to school night, please make sure they don't disturb others. You might also think about requesting a meeting with the teachers instead. That's what we sometimes do when we can't make it. We've found them to be very understanding.

[Anonymous]

Teacher here - - no kids please.

[Anonymous]

Just curious about this. If you really don't have any help (many of my friends do not have spouses or families around), should they just not come?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just curious about this. If you really don't have any help (many of my friends do not have spouses or families around), should they just not come?

They have you, friend. Help them out for the hour or two.

[Anonymous]

I already do help and always offer but not everyone in their situation has such help. What do they do?

[Anonymous]

I'm curious as well - why are people so reluctant to ask their neighbors for help? Do you not know them? I've lived in a couple of areas (condo/house) and I've always gotten to know people well enough to ask them to stay at our place for an hour or two while I ran an errand. I've also returned the favor - usually it's someone needing an onion or a tool but I've also kept kids. We need to help each other in order to build communities.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I already do help and always offer but not everyone in their situation has such help. What do they do?

Use their common sense and figure it out. They managed to give birth and parent a child on a day to day basis. Back to school night should be a cinch. Things are difficult sometimes, but this isn't that big of a deal. Stop making it into such a dramatic situation.

[Anonymous]

See, OP? Ask a simple question, get . . . three pages of flames. Gotta love DCUM - LOL!

[Anonymous]

If you don't follow the rules and respect the teachers and administration, what makes you think your children will?

What kind of example are you setting?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you don't follow the rules and respect the teachers and administration, what makes you think your children will?

What kind of example are you setting?

PP, you are setting the sanctimommy battle ax example..

[Anonymous]

"BTW, I prefer Prada mules with a kitten heel. "

What is a "kitten heel"?