PSA: No gifts means NO GIFTS

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Its rude to put no gifts on an invite. PSA to you.

That’s a very Emily Post, old fashioned attitude. It’s not rude. Nobody wants more crap and I am fine with more and more people deciding not to participate in this farce where parents rush to target the morning of the party to pick out some Marvel junk or else dig around their badger present closet for something they bought on clearance because it’s outdated.

The rude part is the implication that the host has declared your gift crap which you just verified. Maybe you keep a clearance stash and use whatever is on top but my kids love to pick out a gift for a friend. I know you are sure it is not worthy of your house...so we will not burden you.

This. No gifts says “We are so rich AND we don’t trust you to bring anything we’d deem worthy for our child to play with.” It’s so rude and off-putting. It’s really not that hard to drop unwanted stuff off at Goodwill.

It may or may not be difficult for them. But it’s certainly wasteful. And where I volunteered (not Goodwill), a lot got tossed. The kid often opens the gift first and it’s easy for parts to get lost, etc.

Many parents, moms in particular, are under so much stress from their full time jobs and kids. They may not have time to go to Good Will. They may feel stressed from the clutter in their already messy house. They may not want the additional burden of drafting thank you notes.

I can’t imagine being so self-absorbed so that I’d think it was about me as a guest.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Please stop asking this question. If you are invited to a no gift party, you don't bring a gift. Have your child make or fill out a nice card. If they want to give something small that fits in the envelope with the card (we've received a homemade bracelet, an initial crayon, a cute keychain), you can, but they don't have to because the host requested no gifts.

No need to feel sorry for the child, they are either too young to care or this has been discussed with their parent and they are okay with it and whatever alternative their parent provided.

Again, no gift means you don't need to bring a gift.

If you are too good to have your kids get gifts, don't have parties. No kid wants a card, bracelet, keychain or other junk. If your kids are that spoiled that they have so much stuff, stop buying so much stuff and let them have gifts. We will always buy gifts as its abuot the child not you. Its not an alternative childhood. Its bad parenting.

"Stop buying trash for your kids so I can buy trash for your kids, so I can feel superior to you."

[Anonymous]

Please boycott the party if you don't like the conditions. Everybody wins.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Its rude to put no gifts on an invite. PSA to you.

That’s a very Emily Post, old fashioned attitude. It’s not rude. Nobody wants more crap and I am fine with more and more people deciding not to participate in this farce where parents rush to target the morning of the party to pick out some Marvel junk or else dig around their badger present closet for something they bought on clearance because it’s outdated.

The rude part is the implication that the host has declared your gift crap which you just verified. Maybe you keep a clearance stash and use whatever is on top but my kids love to pick out a gift for a friend. I know you are sure it is not worthy of your house...so we will not burden you.

My kids don't want the impulsive junk your kids pick out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you actually were attending many of these parties, you would know that in reality that is not what happens

BECAUSE PEOPLE LIKE YOU DON'T LISTEN. If someone hosts a no gifts party, THEY DON'T WANT GIFTS. Why is this so hard for drama mamas like yourself to understand???? Why on earth would someone write "no gifts please" but then actually expect gifts? That is the stupidest, dumbest reason for bringing a gift I have ever heard. STOP BRINGING GIFTS TO NO GIFT PARTIES YOU COMPLETE IDIOTS.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Its rude to put no gifts on an invite. PSA to you.

That’s a very Emily Post, old fashioned attitude. It’s not rude. Nobody wants more crap and I am fine with more and more people deciding not to participate in this farce where parents rush to target the morning of the party to pick out some Marvel junk or else dig around their badger present closet for something they bought on clearance because it’s outdated.

The rude part is the implication that the host has declared your gift crap which you just verified. Maybe you keep a clearance stash and use whatever is on top but my kids love to pick out a gift for a friend. I know you are sure it is not worthy of your house...so we will not burden you.

My kids don't want the impulsive junk your kids pick out.

You are raising nasty snobs. Don't have a party then. My kids don't want to go to the dumb party you hosted that they have no interest in but go to make you happy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you actually were attending many of these parties, you would know that in reality that is not what happens

Because people decide to make it about themselves instead of respecting the hosts’ wishes.

Maybe they are making it about the kid!

Because they think they know better than the parents? Yuck.

Come on...this is not about what a kid eats and how they are disciplined, This is giving a birthday gift and celebrating a little person. Weird world where parents need to control every toy their kid has. Will Santa get the same instructions?

We don't do no gift parties, but have friends that do. They all make sure their child is on board with this. Frequently, they get their kid a big ticket item in lieu of the gifts they would have otherwise received. My kids only have small parties, so we're not overwhelmed with gifts, but if you have a whole class party, it's completely unnecessary for a child to receive 30+ gifts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Its rude to put no gifts on an invite. PSA to you.

That’s a very Emily Post, old fashioned attitude. It’s not rude. Nobody wants more crap and I am fine with more and more people deciding not to participate in this farce where parents rush to target the morning of the party to pick out some Marvel junk or else dig around their badger present closet for something they bought on clearance because it’s outdated.

The rude part is the implication that the host has declared your gift crap which you just verified. Maybe you keep a clearance stash and use whatever is on top but my kids love to pick out a gift for a friend. I know you are sure it is not worthy of your house...so we will not burden you.

This. No gifts says “We are so rich AND we don’t trust you to bring anything we’d deem worthy for our child to play with.” It’s so rude and off-putting. It’s really not that hard to drop unwanted stuff off at Goodwill.

It may or may not be difficult for them. But it’s certainly wasteful. And where I volunteered (not Goodwill), a lot got tossed. The kid often opens the gift first and it’s easy for parts to get lost, etc.

Many parents, moms in particular, are under so much stress from their full time jobs and kids. They may not have time to go to Good Will. They may feel stressed from the clutter in their already messy house. They may not want the additional burden of drafting thank you notes.

I can’t imagine being so self-absorbed so that I’d think it was about me as a guest.

Heres an idea. Buy less for your kids if you have too much. And, yes, thank you notes is party of a party to teach your kids good manners. This sounds like a parent issue, not a kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Its rude to put no gifts on an invite. PSA to you.

That’s a very Emily Post, old fashioned attitude. It’s not rude. Nobody wants more crap and I am fine with more and more people deciding not to participate in this farce where parents rush to target the morning of the party to pick out some Marvel junk or else dig around their badger present closet for something they bought on clearance because it’s outdated.

The rude part is the implication that the host has declared your gift crap which you just verified. Maybe you keep a clearance stash and use whatever is on top but my kids love to pick out a gift for a friend. I know you are sure it is not worthy of your house...so we will not burden you.

This. No gifts says “We are so rich AND we don’t trust you to bring anything we’d deem worthy for our child to play with.” It’s so rude and off-putting. It’s really not that hard to drop unwanted stuff off at Goodwill.

+10000 god OP people like you are so rude and entitled. AND raising brats. Just accept a gift for god's sake. Teach your kid some manners.

If this is a thing -- that you must insist on bringing gifts to a no gift party (talk about manners, geez!), then fine, do your thing, but people really need to stop asking on this board. Those people are clearly not as principled and insistent on bringing gifts as you are. This post is directed to them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Please stop asking this question. If you are invited to a no gift party, you don't bring a gift. Have your child make or fill out a nice card. If they want to give something small that fits in the envelope with the card (we've received a homemade bracelet, an initial crayon, a cute keychain), you can, but they don't have to because the host requested no gifts.

No need to feel sorry for the child, they are either too young to care or this has been discussed with their parent and they are okay with it and whatever alternative their parent provided.

Again, no gift means you don't need to bring a gift.

If you are too good to have your kids get gifts, don't have parties. No kid wants a card, bracelet, keychain or other junk. If your kids are that spoiled that they have so much stuff, stop buying so much stuff and let them have gifts. We will always buy gifts as its abuot the child not you. Its not an alternative childhood. Its bad parenting.

I'm the OP, and my children have actually never had a "no gift" party. I'm just sick and tired of people asking this same question over and over and over again on this board. Obviously no gifts means they don't want gifts. Why do people have to keep asking "do they really mean no gifts?" Yes, of course they mean it.

This thread wasn't about you and how you insist on giving gifts. I really don't GAF if you give gifts or not, I just want people to stop asking this incredibly dumb question.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Its rude to put no gifts on an invite. PSA to you.

That’s a very Emily Post, old fashioned attitude. It’s not rude. Nobody wants more crap and I am fine with more and more people deciding not to participate in this farce where parents rush to target the morning of the party to pick out some Marvel junk or else dig around their badger present closet for something they bought on clearance because it’s outdated.

The rude part is the implication that the host has declared your gift crap which you just verified. Maybe you keep a clearance stash and use whatever is on top but my kids love to pick out a gift for a friend. I know you are sure it is not worthy of your house...so we will not burden you.

My kids don't want the impulsive junk your kids pick out.

You are raising nasty snobs. Don't have a party then. My kids don't want to go to the dumb party you hosted that they have no interest in but go to make you happy.

Um, maybe stop forcing your kids to go to parties they don't want to go to. You sound like a really bad parent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Please boycott the party if you don't like the conditions. Everybody wins.

100% this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you actually were attending many of these parties, you would know that in reality that is not what happens

Because people decide to make it about themselves instead of respecting the hosts’ wishes.

Maybe they are making it about the kid!

Because they think they know better than the parents? Yuck.

Come on...this is not about what a kid eats and how they are disciplined, This is giving a birthday gift and celebrating a little person. Weird world where parents need to control every toy their kid has. Will Santa get the same instructions?

A lot of kids don't believe in this tradition, PP. Also, PSA: Santa is not a real person. He's a person parents make up so they can give their kids more gifts and not get credit for them (which is so weird, but I digress).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Its rude to put no gifts on an invite. PSA to you.

Our kids have to a socioeconomically diverse school. We explicitly say no gifts so people know they are welcome to come without one. If someone brings a gift anyway it is accepted with a thank you, of course.

Yes. We are at a similar school on the Hill. The vast majority of whole class parties are no gift. It’s great.

[Anonymous]

“I brought a gift to your kid’s party last month but I’m better than you, so no gifts please”

It’s so condescending.