Tween throwing clothes in the bathroom floor everyday

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does the shared bathroom have a door into her bedroom (like a jack and Jill)? I gave mine permission to take a broom and just shove all her sisters stuff into a pile at the door to her bedroom.
I agree with a laundry basket in the bathroom or her room though. They may ones that can go on a door hook that college students use. You have to make this a little easier. Or maybe a basket right outside the bathroom door?
If it helps, you are not alone. This is a common problem. The good news is that it will immediately be solved in college because you can’t leave clothes in the dorm bathroom. Maybe another solution is to buy her a bathrobe and tell her clothes come off in her bedroom NOT the bathroom—that’s what college kids do. Robe goes on hook on bathroom or bedroom.

My utter slob went to college and is immediately cured because she doesn’t want to piss off her roommate. Pisssing off her sister and her mom was fine, of course.

Agree with all of this and recommend you get DH involved. It's his bathroom too.

[Anonymous]

If your ask your DD to solve the issue, what does she say will help her?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Start confiscating the clothes.

this.

anything on the floor disappears.

your choice if she gets it back or not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have tried telling nicely, screaming, nothing is working. Every day DD throws her clothes on the bathroom floor in her bathroom that she shares with sibling. Initially I tried telling nicely that this is not acceptable and I am not her maid to pick it up and put it in the laundry basket in the laundry room which is just 2 doors down in the same upper level. It's not like she has to go to the basement. It didn't work and she either ignored me or said she will do it but never did. I started screaming and that doesn't work either. Now she has resorted to throwing things in the floor in the laundry room or in the kids bathroom and it is like a pile there in both places. And if she likes a certain top she rummages through the laundry baskets, dumps everything else on the floor and takes the unlaundered top to use again. I've tried taking away the laptop or Chromebook chargers so she won't be able to use those as a consequence but she doesn't care and takes a book and goes to read. I am at my wits end.

Either she is stressed, has ADHD or short on time. Go easy and don't ruin her last years at home with you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If your ask your DD to solve the issue, what does she say will help her?

Great advice. Ask her?

[Anonymous]

Oh no! Do you have a leaky pipe that may burst and flood only the specific area where the clothing is? That would be so awful if her clothes just happened to get all yucky...

[Anonymous]

It’s not just the clothes on the floor it’s the disrespect. OP I’m with you. I agree with a fine if she has money, or taking the clothes outright. Or stop doing things for her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Start confiscating the clothes.

+1

Such a simple solution.

People don’t know how to parent/enforce consequences these days.

So many posts like this on this board.

[Anonymous]

Is this the only issue you have with this kid? If this is, you're a lucky parent, but your response to it ("screaming") has just upped the ante and leads me to wonder if your response to other things is similarly over the top. If so, this may be the only way she can feel some control.

Kids leave clothes on the floor, drop their bath towels on the floor, or otherwise have messy rooms and bathrooms -- it's normal. It's not to say they should never pick them up, or be taught to pick them up, but back off a bit and perhaps it's once a week -- e.g., let all the kids know that Saturday morning is pick-up time. If she still refuses to do it, sit her down and calmly ask her what the problem is. Ask her if it seems overwhelming to start and perhaps the two of you can do it together this time, and next time she can do it herself.

[Anonymous]

I have 3 teens. No screen time until all chores are done. That includes picking up after themselves, laundry done, dishwasher emptied, and kids' bathroom tidied. Other than the laundry, the chores rotate so that each kid only has 1-2 chores per day. No chores, no screens.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have 3 teens. No screen time until all chores are done. That includes picking up after themselves, laundry done, dishwasher emptied, and kids' bathroom tidied. Other than the laundry, the chores rotate so that each kid only has 1-2 chores per day. No chores, no screens.

Curious, how do you accomplish this? Do they turn their phones/ipads/laptops in as soon as they get home from school, and then you hand them back out when chores are done?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have tried telling nicely, screaming, nothing is working. Every day DD throws her clothes on the bathroom floor in her bathroom that she shares with sibling. Initially I tried telling nicely that this is not acceptable and I am not her maid to pick it up and put it in the laundry basket in the laundry room which is just 2 doors down in the same upper level. It's not like she has to go to the basement. It didn't work and she either ignored me or said she will do it but never did. I started screaming and that doesn't work either. Now she has resorted to throwing things in the floor in the laundry room or in the kids bathroom and it is like a pile there in both places. And if she likes a certain top she rummages through the laundry baskets, dumps everything else on the floor and takes the unlaundered top to use again. I've tried taking away the laptop or Chromebook chargers so she won't be able to use those as a consequence but she doesn't care and takes a book and goes to read. I am at my wits end.

My DD did this too!! She has a big laundry basket in her room and I couldn’t stand to see her clothes in a pile on the bathroom floor every day. I picked them up and put them in her basket. She’d do her laundry, leave the clean clothes for WEEKS, and every morning rush out to school, get her shorts out of the bottom of the basket, spill the rest out on to the living room floor (where she left the basket).

I would beg, bribe, punish, etc. nothing worked long term. So, not the best solution but I just got it out of my face so it wouldn’t drive me crazy. I’d put her dirty clothes in her hamper. I’d dump the clean ones in her room (out of the laundry room), then, her room would be knee deep in a mess of dirty clothes and clean clothes. And papers. And spoons. Every few months I’d clean it, or help her clean it while listening to music. Every once in a while I’d tell her she couldn’t go out until it was clean. Sometimes she “forgot” and went out anyway. Sometimes she’d clean it - half way. I would do the rest.

In August, she moved out to college. She’s managed to figure out how to keep her little room clean (I think) and her laundry done. She and her roommate are close friends.

I miss her SO much. Her room is clean. I have another kid who leaves her clothes on the bathroom floor.

I pick them up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is so far down on the list of thing I care about. So what if there are clothes on the floor?

My kid does this-there’s a mountain of clothes in his bathroom until it’s time to do laundry. He then picks them up and does his laundry. I don’t do it for him. The only time I will pick it up for him is if the cleaners are coming. Kid has late practices and early start times so if I have to pick them up once every other week so be it. Kid is great overall so I’m not going to get on his case about a pile of clothes on the floor.

Older 2 kids were like this too and they’ve managed to become functioning adults who now contain their clothes to their room and not shared spaces.

Different scenario. This isn’t in her own room, this is in a shared bathroom so it impacts other members of the family.

+1
I really empathize with OP. We don't know much about the sibling and for all we know the sibling has special needs or sensitivities. I wish people would stop thinking outside their own boxes. There are a lot of scenarios that might make this a delicate situation for OP.

I would put up one of those hanging laundry bags that goes behind the door or on the wall. I'm not sure that will solve the situation but maybe it'll help a little.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have 3 teens. No screen time until all chores are done. That includes picking up after themselves, laundry done, dishwasher emptied, and kids' bathroom tidied. Other than the laundry, the chores rotate so that each kid only has 1-2 chores per day. No chores, no screens.

Curious, how do you accomplish this? Do they turn their phones/ipads/laptops in as soon as they get home from school, and then you hand them back out when chores are done?

We basically monitor their whereabouts until the chores are done. If the dishwasher hasn't been emptied. We find them and take the phone until the dishwasher has been emptied. To be honest, we have had this system in place since they started doing chores at about age 6. They know we mean business, so if we ask them to do a chore, they just do it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Tell her that you'll get rid of her clothes that are on the floor. If she can't be bothered to put them where they belong, you'll give them away.

I'd also start making her sort all of the laundry for the entire family so that she can start to appreciate how much work it can be.

All of this but be clear about how many hours/minutes before you'll confiscate the clothes, and be consistent.