Are women in their 40s auto ugly to people on this sub?

[Anonymous]

Why are people ashamed to look their age these days? There are so many beautiful people in their 40s-50s now. Own it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I feel great about myself in my forties. Part of it is that I'm financially secure, healthy, happily enough married, and fit as ever. I don't seek approval from strangers anymore, so I don't have the eating disorder that plagued me in my twenties. Men still hit on me as much as ever, and I think a big part is that I move through life more confidently now.

You said earlier you don't seek approval from strangers yet notice men hitting on you lol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When I'm buying beer or wine at Safeway at the self checkout I like to plat a game where I ask the attendant to guess my birth year before scanning my license. Yesterady the guy guessed 1988. I was born in '71

Weird, don’t do that! And if the guy was under 30, remember these kids have no idea how to do math. 1988 sounds like a million years ago to young people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I feel great about myself in my forties. Part of it is that I'm financially secure, healthy, happily enough married, and fit as ever. I don't seek approval from strangers anymore, so I don't have the eating disorder that plagued me in my twenties. Men still hit on me as much as ever, and I think a big part is that I move through life more confidently now.

You said earlier you don't seek approval from strangers yet notice men hitting on you lol.

How does one not notice being hit on?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When I'm buying beer or wine at Safeway at the self checkout I like to plat a game where I ask the attendant to guess my birth year before scanning my license. Yesterady the guy guessed 1988. I was born in '71

Weird, don’t do that! And if the guy was under 30, remember these kids have no idea how to do math. 1988 sounds like a million years ago to young people.

So true. My teen refers to anyone over 35 as a "Boomer."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Because you are in the minority, and in a few years you'll be part of the majority.

I'm Asian. In late August, I dropped off my 9th grader for a tour of her new high school, and as I was leaving, one of the tour guides asked me to step inside to join the tour as it was leaving. The tour was student-only. I had to explain I was the parent. It was embarrassing. Maybe that guide needed glasses, but it's not the first time this has happened. I got yelled at for being late to my other teen's choir practice years ago, until the manager recognized me as a parent and not a student. Again, embarrassing.

But I know that in a year or two, all that will be finished and I'll be visibly middle-aged.

So enjoy it, OP, it won't last.

Cool stories but they don’t really answer the question. All you’re saying is that you look young. Young does not equate beauty as there are a lot of unattractive young women out there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Women over 40 aren't supposed to be seen at all, let alone seen as sexy. "40-year olds" in movies are played by women in their late 20s. Actually-40-year-old women play their grandmothers. It's all a part of the capitalist youth-obsessed culture that says women have to starve and slave to stay young in order to be of value to men.

If you want to be seen as viable breeding stock, I guess it holds true. If you're even slightly more intellectual than base mammalian drives, it's really easy to see beauty culture for what it is. Experience is beautiful. Life well-lived is beautiful. This board runs pretty shallow, physically and intellectually, so yeah, there are a lot of "old women are hags" posts here.

I, for one, have embraced hagdom, as it makes it really easy to weed out the people who are only interested in the "woman as trophy/broodmare" mentality.

You are so right! With you in hagdom!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When I'm buying beer or wine at Safeway at the self checkout I like to plat a game where I ask the attendant to guess my birth year before scanning my license. Yesterady the guy guessed 1988. I was born in '71

Weird, don’t do that! And if the guy was under 30, remember these kids have no idea how to do math. 1988 sounds like a million years ago to young people.

So true. My teen refers to anyone over 35 as a "Boomer."

+2. I remember when I was 18, older women I worked with asked me to guess their age. Literally everybody over 30 looked the same to me, and I didn’t want to offend them, so I regularly told women in their 40s and 50s they looked 28.

Also, today I was talking to a 19 year old about his YouTube channel and he said “yea I get clips from old TV shows. But not OLD old like from the 90s”. 90s are OLD old now.

[Anonymous]

How utterly pathetic that anyone would ask you to guess their age.

See, I don’t know what some of you think….that women are running around going “Can you guess how old I am?” and the hapless person says something to make them feel better. People legitimately eff my age up all the time and it’s not from some guessing game.

I just think a lot of you making snarky remarks regret your sun worship in your youth and are paying the price now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Because you are in the minority, and in a few years you'll be part of the majority.

I'm Asian. In late August, I dropped off my 9th grader for a tour of her new high school, and as I was leaving, one of the tour guides asked me to step inside to join the tour as it was leaving. The tour was student-only. I had to explain I was the parent. It was embarrassing. Maybe that guide needed glasses, but it's not the first time this has happened. I got yelled at for being late to my other teen's choir practice years ago, until the manager recognized me as a parent and not a student. Again, embarrassing.

But I know that in a year or two, all that will be finished and I'll be visibly middle-aged.

So enjoy it, OP, it won't last.

Fellow Asian American here. I think I looked my absolute best when I was 40. I won’t say that I looked like a teen but I looked very youthful, fit and attractive. I looked fantastic until I was 44. At age 46, I felt like I ages 10 years because when I was 40, I looked no different than age 30 before I had kids. In fact, I looked better at 40 than 30. I had 3 kids and worked out and was the same weight as pre kids.

I’m almost 47 and 50 is very different than 40 or 44.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Seems like they get bashed a lot on here for being ugly or fat or miserable but I'm pretty happy and look to be in my 20s. I'd post pictures unfiltered here if I could stay anon for proof but I do pass for 20s and I am dating a few very hot guys old with no sex in their 30s. Frequently hit on by guys in their 20s too but no. So why the hate for women in their 40s by both men and women?

Sure, Jan.

But seriously. You do not look to be in your 20s, lol. If you are in your forties and believe that, you are delusional.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When I'm buying beer or wine at Safeway at the self checkout I like to plat a game where I ask the attendant to guess my birth year before scanning my license. Yesterady the guy guessed 1988. I was born in '71

Weird, don’t do that! And if the guy was under 30, remember these kids have no idea how to do math. 1988 sounds like a million years ago to young people.

Lol, that person was delusional. The Safeway knew he wasn’t going to get in trouble for insulting a customer. He also knew PP was born in the 1900s. It’s amazing how many people actually think they look 36 at 53.

[Anonymous]

I struggled in my 20s because I looked so young and I had had no styling or fashion sense to offset it. I got a lot better in my 30s and hit my peak in my early 40s once my kids were in school and I had time to work on myself. I’m 47 now and I can see some lines and crows feet but my body still looks good. My husband still thinks I’m very hot and jokes that he knew I’d look like this when we met 25 years ago. I don’t believe him!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Seems like they get bashed a lot on here for being ugly or fat or miserable but I'm pretty happy and look to be in my 20s. I'd post pictures unfiltered here if I could stay anon for proof but I do pass for 20s and I am dating a few very hot guys old with no sex in their 30s. Frequently hit on by guys in their 20s too but no. So why the hate for women in their 40s by both men and women?

I am so confused. You're dating old hot guys who didn't have sex in their 30s? What?

Anyway, women in their 40s don't look 20s. None of them do. Sorry.

That being said, the people who hate 40s women are either men who are bitter no women want them, or women who are bitter when they see other women having fun and not behaving "properly". In either case, you can dismiss what they think, because they sure as hell aren't out there having fun or getting laid.

Sorry you are wrong. Women in their 40s who look young and hot do exist.

And I meant hot guys I havent had sex with yet because it's perceived here that women in their 40s all have ons.

There are women in their 40s that look a few years younger, and women in their 40s who are attractive, but nobody, male or female, looks 20-30 years younger. If you think you look 20, you aren’t around many 20 year olds.

It’s fine. You don’t need to look younger to be attractive or have value.

Also, the whole “I don’t have sex” thing is weird. This whole post is steeped in internalized misogyny. It’s okay for women to look their age. It’s okay for woman of all ages to enjoy casual sex.

Also has strong “pick me girl” vibes. We get it, you’re the hot woman whose not like other women, you’re hot and chaste and all the boys of all ages want you even though you don’t have sex.

I work with many interns and other younger people and they all mistook my age.

Do you also believe all 20 and 30 somethings look young? Many are hunched over due to cell phone and laptop use or overweight.

Looks like you have your own insecurities and like to argue.

Never said it was not okay for women to look their age. Read again. Nevee said casual sex is wrong. Pick a fight elsewhere you have issues.

Seriously, has anyone seen some of these twenty something women with their green hair and tattoos? No wonder their male counterparts are hitting on older women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because you are in the minority, and in a few years you'll be part of the majority.

I'm Asian. In late August, I dropped off my 9th grader for a tour of her new high school, and as I was leaving, one of the tour guides asked me to step inside to join the tour as it was leaving. The tour was student-only. I had to explain I was the parent. It was embarrassing. Maybe that guide needed glasses, but it's not the first time this has happened. I got yelled at for being late to my other teen's choir practice years ago, until the manager recognized me as a parent and not a student. Again, embarrassing.

But I know that in a year or two, all that will be finished and I'll be visibly middle-aged.

So enjoy it, OP, it won't last.

Fellow Asian American here. I think I looked my absolute best when I was 40. I won’t say that I looked like a teen but I looked very youthful, fit and attractive. I looked fantastic until I was 44. At age 46, I felt like I ages 10 years because when I was 40, I looked no different than age 30 before I had kids. In fact, I looked better at 40 than 30. I had 3 kids and worked out and was the same weight as pre kids.

I’m almost 47 and 50 is very different than 40 or 44.

Yep, 45 is the turning point! It goes downhill after that - in terms of looks at least.