Forum Index
»
Infants, Toddlers, & Preschoolers
Leaving your baby
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
I actually have plenty of frozen milk I can bring to my parents who are watching DS. I also pumped there last month and left 28 oz in their freezer. I plan to bring a cooler with me to be able to store it from the hotel (use their refrigerator) back to my parents or if I pump in the car. However, if it is too much dealing, I will just pump and dump to keep up my supply. |
Anonymous
|
To 8:35, I have the exact same thought everytime I read a post about leaving a DC with the dad. My husband would be annoyed if I equated leaving him alone with our son with leaving our son alone with my mom. There is nothing the mom can do that the dad can't, except for breastfeeding and a pump and a bottle can solve that problem.
As for pumping while you're away, I got advice from the breastfeeding center about how much I needed to pump to maintain supply. When I went at 3 and 4 months, I only had to pump 3 times a day. Supply was just fine. |
Anonymous
|
My cousin left her six month old baby with her parents for three weeks - her husband was in between jobs, she hadn't gone back to work, and they decided to go to Italy for three weeks. Her daughter had already spent a lot of time with her grandparents; my cousin's brother and his wife were also living with her parents at the time. The baby did beautifully, spent three weeks with grandparents and an aunt and uncle who adore her.
To the nasty people begrudging you leaving your child with your parents - perhaps their families aren't as close as yours are. If you trust your parents, and you know your child would be happy with your parents, then off you go. |
Anonymous
|
" Plus working full time I have guilt for being gone so long during the week anyway. "
Does your DH feel guilty for being gone so long during the week? |
Anonymous
| My son is a really flexible, adaptible child. I bet he would do fine if I left him for a few days, but I haven't yet (10mo). I think I would be a wreck. I'm much more needy than he is. |
Anonymous
This is the most honest comment I've seen yet. |
Anonymous
| We left DD with my mom for 6 days when she was 12 months old--we went on vacation out of the country to celebrate our 5-year anniversary (and I got told several times on this board that I didn't care about my daughter because I did this). She was fine, and it was wonderful for us. I think it might be a little harder on her now that she's older than it was then. You should be able to get away once in a while if you want to! |
Anonymous
In this instance, why does it matter what the DH feels? If the working mom thinks she will feel too guilty at time away at this point, that is just how she feels. Whether or not being away from baby bothers dad is a separate issue. I hate when a woman expresses her sincere feelings about her kids and people try to turn it into either "DH is useless" or "if it doesn't bother the working man, it shouldn't bother you." People can't help their instincts. They can be given supportive messages like a lot of people feel that way, it's okay -but for all this hullabaloo about women owning their own lives, for pete's sake let the woman own her feelings. |
Anonymous
| DH and DD( 9mths) have beeen gone for two weeks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It feels like such a rejuvenating break to me. First time we both left her was at 8mths for two nights. |
Anonymous
Thank you! |
Anonymous
|
"People can't help their instincts. "
Guilt is not an instinct. It's a choice, it's always a choice. |
Anonymous
|
Wow, I just have to say this is really a cultural thing-- I too don't know when I'll feel comfortable leaving my baby for more than a day, but my in-laws from S. Asia asked me when I'm planning to send her over to stay with them, and many friends have sent their 1-3 yr. olds for 6 month-1 yr. to live with extended family, since they figure they'll be loved and cared for.
Me, I'm selfish-- I just want to be around my baby! But in that context, I'd say a few weeks is nothing. |
Anonymous
Ever heard of flight or fright? Women's breasts leaking when a child cries? Yes, this must all be a choice. Give me a break. Someone can instinctively feel guilt and then talk themselves out of it. Or not. But what is your larger point? Should this "guilty by choice" mother be lectured because she is apparently choosing to make herself miserable by your standards? I WOHM, and I definitely feel guilty about loosing time with my kids. But when I sit and think about it, I have a million good reasons why I do continue to work. Please explain to me what is so wrong with this. |
Anonymous
|
"Should this "guilty by choice" mother be lectured because she is apparently choosing to make herself miserable by your standards? "
She should admit she is making the CHOICE to feel guilty. |
Anonymous
Your lectures are so informative and uplifting. Do continue. And tell us do you feel guilty about anything? Or are you one of those narcissists who refuses to feel guilt whatsoever? |