Stop using the word bespoke in corporate lingo

[Anonymous]

My boss always wants to "socialize" a potential plan to gather feedback.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The utilization of corporate lingo serves as a strategic alignment tool, ensuring stakeholders are consistently on the same page and synergizing towards shared objectives. By leveraging a standardized lexicon, we optimize cross-functional communication, enhance workflow efficiencies, and create a seamless interface between departments. This fosters an environment where key deliverables and KPIs are easily understood, facilitating swift decision-making and driving value-added initiatives. Corporate lingo empowers teams to operationalize core competencies while maintaining agility in a dynamic marketplace. It also streamlines onboarding processes, allowing new hires to quickly acclimate to the organizational culture and align with the broader mission statement. In short, the deployment of corporate jargon is a best practice for maximizing ROI on human capital and driving scalable growth across the enterprise.

Wow. I'm impressed at the nightmarish corporate workplace you've just conjured up.

[Anonymous]

Align

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Haha. I'll play: impactful

Anyone who uses “I’ll play” rather than just answering.

Or “I’ll bite”

So gross

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Bespoke is what British people say instead of tailored. I work with Brits. It’s not jargon to them.

This.

[Anonymous]

My manager is always “surfacing” issues and “signal boosting” various initiatives. I wish she’d stop.

[Anonymous]

It seems commonly accepted that corporate speak sucks. Why has it not died out yet?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Bespoke is what British people say instead of tailored. I work with Brits. It’s not jargon to them.

I don’t get it. They mean different things

[Anonymous]

It’s the ones who poke the most fun who contribute the most to corporate speak. They excel at it in the workplace and then pretend to be not "of it." Go F yourselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Haha. I'll play: impactful

Anyone who uses “I’ll play” rather than just answering.

Or “I’ll bite”

So gross

Yes!

[Anonymous]

Thank you, OP. Bespoke is one of my least favorite words!

[Anonymous]

"To your point..."

[Anonymous]

Oh yuck after reading this! I'm getting ready to jump onto a meeting to ensure that our team is aligned on our value propositions so that we can present a thoughtful and solid solution to our client. Ugh!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It seems commonly accepted that corporate speak sucks. Why has it not died out yet?

Because there are so many people who don’t really know what they are doing. Corporate speak helps them mask that. Also people are parrots and it one person uses jargon others copy it. And on and on it will go until we are dead.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I cannot think of another proper word that I dislike more than bespoke. when used, it sees like the speaker is trying too hard to impress others.

Unless it's a Brit talking about tailored suits.