down's child at preschool...concerned

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There can be some validity to OP's concerns depending on the child's developmental level. I worked at a camp and we had a Down's child who literally required all of my attention. I could not leave her for a moment or she would wander away, improperly use materials (eat playdough, color on herself with marker) or generally be disruptive (sing out loud while person was reading) My co-teacher had to manage the rest of the kids alone while every other group had the benefit of 2 teachers. She was a perfectly lovely child but just not as easily directed as the other kids and not a good listener. Only time will tell if this child manages well so just wait and see.

Perhaps this was the case but as a former teacher, I can tell you that children with down's do not have a monopoly on being inappropriate and/or disruptive, particularly in preschool. There are plenty of "normal" kids who fit this description and are aggressive and mean, on top of it. I think children with down's are probably much like other kids...some are inappropriate, some are disruptive, some are cooperative, some are kind, some are more intelligent, some need more help, etc, etc, etc

I totally agree with this.


However I really have to wonder if the OP is for real. It is hard to believe with all of the educated parents on this site that the OP could possibly be that ignorant. I think the OP is just trying to pick a fight.

[Anonymous]

If that were my child, I would hope that you wouldn't work him/her - as a special needs parent, I would be very specific that you be kept far away from my child. I'm hoping that this is a joke - but it's probably not. I feel sorry for you - and for your child, who will probably be raised to be as ignorant as you.

[Anonymous]

If some of you are meant to educate OP, you're not doing a very good job. Spewing nasty names and calling her ignorant are not going to change her perception.

OP raised a valid question. It is valid in the sense that she doesn't seem to know what having a child with Down's syndrome in class is like and has likely never met a child with DS. She may not know that there are different levels of functioning for kids with DS. The question may seem stupid, ignorant, whatever to you. But, just like your child is your priority, hers is her priority. She is asking questions.

I personally have liked having kids with different needs in my child's class, for many reasons. And, I have friends with children that have SN and who my child plays with. That said, I don't think any of OP's questions were so far out of bounds to require some of the responses here. I get the initial visceral negative reaction. But, we have 3 pages of not very helpful responses. Why don't some of the parents of SN needs kids or teachers with the experiences weigh in with some ANSWERS?

[Anonymous]

Wow. just wow. How can anyone be so insensitive and ignorant. There is no way this comes from an educated person.

OP, do the rest of us a favor and home school your kids. I never want my child or myself to come in contact with you or your kids.

And for the rest of the pps. Kids are kids. ADHD, hyper, sensory issues whatever. They all need to grow-up eventually and they have to work and function. That means getting along and working together. Might as well be exposed early on and learn to deal. That's life baby.

[Anonymous]

My mom was a special education preschool teacher in a local school system for many years. I volunteered in her classroom a number of times. If anything, the children with Down Syndrome required less attention than the other kids - they were generally happy, mellow and easy to get along with.

My child was in a coop preschool last year and there were a number of kids that were aggressive - these kids took up much more teacher time than a child with Down Syndrome ever would.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If some of you are meant to educate OP, you're not doing a very good job. Spewing nasty names and calling her ignorant are not going to change her perception.

OP raised a valid question. It is valid in the sense that she doesn't seem to know what having a child with Down's syndrome in class is like and has likely never met a child with DS. She may not know that there are different levels of functioning for kids with DS. The question may seem stupid, ignorant, whatever to you. But, just like your child is your priority, hers is her priority. She is asking questions.

I personally have liked having kids with different needs in my child's class, for many reasons. And, I have friends with children that have SN and who my child plays with. That said, I don't think any of OP's questions were so far out of bounds to require some of the responses here. I get the initial visceral negative reaction. But, we have 3 pages of not very helpful responses. Why don't some of the parents of SN needs kids or teachers with the experiences weigh in with some ANSWERS?

It's not my job to educate the OP on special needs children. If the OP is that ignorant (and again, I don't believe this is real) then she probably was the same type of parent in the 60's who would have posted (had the internet existed) "I have an African American child in my school, what do I do" - until my child is unable to mainstream in school, he has the right to attend along side his peers. I've had parents in my school ask me questions, and I'm happy to answer them - that I appreciate.

[Anonymous]

It's not my job to educate the OP on special needs children. If the OP is that ignorant (and again, I don't believe this is real) then she probably was the same type of parent in the 60's who would have posted (had the internet existed) "I have an African American child in my school, what do I do" - until my child is unable to mainstream in school, he has the right to attend along side his peers. I've had parents in my school ask me questions, and I'm happy to answer them - that I appreciate.

Of course it is your job to educate people about special needs, if you have a special needs child. While I agree that OP's initial reaction may seem negative, you can't just assume that she, and other people, are not open to learning. Perhaps if people took the time to explain Down's Syndrome (or any other disability), then it would help others who have never been in close contact with a child with Down's. Unless you know that someone is just a mean, bad person, I don't think being "ignorant" precludes anyone from learning and becoming more accepting and inclusive, whether that person is an adult or a child.

[Anonymous]

I'm sorry OP, but the PPs are right - my MIL teaches middle school and there are several disruptive SNs students in her classes, as well as a mix of higher and lower achieving students, that make it difficult to keep everyone stimulated and challenged. However, the policies in most public schools now are vastly different than 20 or 30 years ago; everyone is mixed together rather than separated by achievement level. So get used to it, and if you have concerns that lower achieving (regardless of whether they are SNs) students are going to draw the teacher's attention away from your child, well, that's life. And it's your job as a parent to supplement where the school leaves off.

That said, I vividly remember growing up with SNs children in my preschool and in my elementary school classes. They were perfectly normal in the way that young children are normal - meaning, they all have their quirks. As an adult I'd hope that you could learn to treat them just like every other kid and not assume that they need tons of special attention. My son has a child with Down's in his preschool/daycare class and he is the cutest kid - runs right up to you and gives you giant hugs. There is another child in his class who is very, very inquisitive and outgoing, and even though she isn't SNs some parents have apparently complained that she 'bothers' them when they pick up/drop off their children. Seems like you might be one of these type of parents, and that really makes me sad.

I would also be careful about your judgment of the preschool teachers; they KNOW how to deal with 'needy' children (again, whether or not they are SNs), and not make the other children feel neglected. At this age children can be patient and helpful rather than 100% self-focused; after all, isn't that part of what you learn in preschool? Trust that the teachers know how to handle things appropriately, and if you don't, then ask them.

[Anonymous]

My friend's daughter has Down Syndrome and she's been in daycare with my daughter for a couple of years now. Her first transition (to the mobile infant room) was behind schedule because she walked late, but otherwise she's been transitioning with the rest of the kids. I don't think she requires much more help/attention than the other kids, and I haven't gotten the impression from the teachers that her presence is an issue. She's a sweet little girl. I imagine if special instructions are needed on your coop days, they'll give them to you. Really wouldn't worry so much about this, though. In your child's school career, you're going to encounter lots of kids with various traits that will influence the way the kids are taught, including high-functioning autistic kids, kids with ADHD, very sensitive kids, very smart kids, kids with learning disabilities, kids who speak English as a second language... better get used to it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

It's not my job to educate the OP on special needs children. If the OP is that ignorant (and again, I don't believe this is real) then she probably was the same type of parent in the 60's who would have posted (had the internet existed) "I have an African American child in my school, what do I do" - until my child is unable to mainstream in school, he has the right to attend along side his peers. I've had parents in my school ask me questions, and I'm happy to answer them - that I appreciate.

Of course it is your job to educate people about special needs, if you have a special needs child. While I agree that OP's initial reaction may seem negative, you can't just assume that she, and other people, are not open to learning. Perhaps if people took the time to explain Down's Syndrome (or any other disability), then it would help others who have never been in close contact with a child with Down's. Unless you know that someone is just a mean, bad person, I don't think being "ignorant" precludes anyone from learning and becoming more accepting and inclusive, whether that person is an adult or a child.

As an AA, is it my job to educate racist people? I don't think so. Is it a Jewish person's job to educate anti-semetic people? Then why do parents of special needs people have to be "the educators" - personally, I'm just trying to do the best by my child. As everyone else is.

[Anonymous]

My son's got a kid with Down's in his class and I'm thrilled to death. What a wonderful lesson to get at such an early age -- to learn about and befriend differently-abled people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My son's got a kid with Down's in his class and I'm thrilled to death. What a wonderful lesson to get at such an early age -- to learn about and befriend differently-abled people.

COMPLETELY this! OP why would you look at this in such a negative way?!?!?!? Your child gets to see that everyone is different, and some people are more different than others. I hope your personality is not rubbing off on your child!

[Anonymous]

The OP ought to feel ashamed of herself.

[Anonymous]

I find it hard to believe OP is for real. I think this is a fake post designed to stir up conversation on the topic (and/or trouble.)

[Anonymous]

OP, what will you do when your child is in a class with 5 or 6 kids with some behavior disorder or another that truly does monopolize the teacher's time, but doesn't qualify them for any extra assistance?

I honestly don't feel you have anything to really be worried about right now. (And, JFTR, I've worked with kids with disabilities, both cognitive and physical)