Ever been to India? Why do people find it so depressing?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If life were so great in India, people would not immigrate as soon as they had the minimum means—and not immigrate to the West but everywhere in the world. Tanzania, Kenya, and South Africa have huge Indian populations.

Some people would probably like to stay in India for cultural reasons, but the competition for opportunities is huge there. I know people complain about the DMV being competitive, but it's nothing compared to India.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Following up on the earlier post here. My dh refuses to go again, says it’s a horrible place and he’s usually open minded. Maybe I’ve seen too many Bollywood films, but it’s always seemed so exotic and charming to me

It is definitely not charming. It is like you are seeing a disney-fied version of India, based upon Bollywood.

It is an ancient and fascinating culture. There are beautiful aspects of the country. But the contrast between the rich and poor is brutal (think barefoot women walking with water on their heads and hour outside of the capital). Tons of corruption and violence, including sexual violence against women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The amount of poverty and classism is alarming.

You are expected just to ignore it and not make eye contact.

I don’t follow. Not make eye contact? With who?

With anyone staring at you, and they will be staring. The poverty is not remotely similar to the poverty in the US. The amount of people (families) living on the street is shocking. The traffic is shocking (family of four on a motorcycle, with a toddler hanging on to it's mom, and an infant in her lap, etc).

If you are a Western woman walking alone, you will be met with hostile, leering stares. God forbid you are out after dark (where you will not encounter other women alone).

[Anonymous]

Yes- poverty is depressing, but loved it!
Fascinating, colorful, and different--
To me, that is what traveling is all about!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The amount of poverty and classism is alarming.

You are expected just to ignore it and not make eye contact.

I don’t follow. Not make eye contact? With who?

With anyone staring at you, and they will be staring. The poverty is not remotely similar to the poverty in the US. The amount of people (families) living on the street is shocking. The traffic is shocking (family of four on a motorcycle, with a toddler hanging on to it's mom, and an infant in her lap, etc).

Really? The people I know from there seem middle class or wealthy. Is it just bc they’re from a higher caste?

OMG, are you ignorant or just sheltered, or both.

Do you think the world's poorest people can just travel by air to the world's richest country????????????????????? You are trying to generalize from emigrant Indians a wealthy white person has encountered here?

Please try to teach your children more about the world than you know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There is groping of women all the time in India. That is the mildest offense towards women. Indian men have a reputation for being abusive, not just to women but to others.
There is just chaos everywhere you go in India.

Chaos is the word. In cities, anyway.

[Anonymous]

I've been to India many times because my husband has relatives there. 

India can be overwhelming in many, many ways. The people. The air. The traffic. The noise. The animals. The heat at certain times of the year. The juxtaposition of limos driving by naked children squatting on the street. And yes, in certain touristy places there are tons of kids begging for money or people selling stuff who won't take no for an answer.

But then there are parts of India that are amazing. There is no better Indian food I have eaten than the food made by my H's auntie and cousin in their flat, with vegetables from the guy pushing the cart down the street. The museums have some amazing pieces (The Veiled Rebecca). Amazing architecture: the Taj Mahal, the Gateway of India, Qutb Minar, Charminar. And the fashions and fabrics for women: so colorful and beautiful...I have an outfit my FIL bought me 20+ years ago that no longer fits but is just so gorgeous I will never get rid of it.

It's a country of many dichotomies, unfortunately. And like a PP said, that's not everyone's cup of tea. Each traveler knows themselves and can make that judgment whether India is right for them. For me, there are still places I haven't seen: Pune, Jaipur so I would go again in a heartbeat. But then again, I know what to expect.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Following up on the earlier post here. My dh refuses to go again, says it’s a horrible place and he’s usually open minded. Maybe I’ve seen too many Bollywood films, but it’s always seemed so exotic and charming to me

Then go if you find it so charming. Hope you don't get raped or murdered! Have fun!!! Yes, America is # 10

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The amount of poverty and classism is alarming.

You are expected just to ignore it and not make eye contact.

I don’t follow. Not make eye contact? With who?

Clearly you haven't been to India.

Hence the post, dummy

Sigh.

You can't really drive or walk through a city without being swarmed by poor people -- many of them very young children, many very physically deformed, crying and looking very said and begging. They stare until you make eye contact. Then they beg and beg. And it never stops. There are thousands of them, so you can't connect with someone even if you want to. Because it is never ending. Like an avalanche of human pain and suffering. And your only hope to get through it at all is to not make eye contact.

Is this just the case in Agra or did you experience it in Delhi too?

[Anonymous]

A lot depends on where you go. It's a big country, and every region is dramatically different - culture, language, religion. India is truly everything - it's a comedy, it's a tragedy, it's a farce. If you go, it should really be for more than 3 weeks. For a first time visitor, the first week is always overwhelming and don't expect it to be otherwise.

The three regions that I think are probably going to be the most pleasant and interesting for westerners are Kerala, Rajasthan, and the Darjeeling area in West Bengal. For cities, my preference is Kolkatta, but that's probably a little much for most. I prefer Mumbai over Delhi. But it's a wonderful country if you approach it with some understanding. The India rich do tend to be awful. But the best hotels are also in India. You can't really go wrong with a Taj or Oberoi. I prefer Taj - it's a little more informal. But one way or another, it's going to be interesting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The amount of poverty and classism is alarming.

You are expected just to ignore it and not make eye contact.

I don’t follow. Not make eye contact? With who?

With anyone staring at you, and they will be staring. The poverty is not remotely similar to the poverty in the US. The amount of people (families) living on the street is shocking. The traffic is shocking (family of four on a motorcycle, with a toddler hanging on to it's mom, and an infant in her lap, etc).

Really? The people I know from there seem middle class or wealthy. Is it just bc they’re from a higher caste?

Yes. Very much yes.

There seems to be tons of conflation between caste and wealth. They are not an overlap. The people PP knows have wealth and education. It is not a caste signifier.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The amount of poverty and classism is alarming.

You are expected just to ignore it and not make eye contact.

I don’t follow. Not make eye contact? With who?

Clearly you haven't been to India.

Hence the post, dummy

Sigh.

You can't really drive or walk through a city without being swarmed by poor people -- many of them very young children, many very physically deformed, crying and looking very said and begging. They stare until you make eye contact. Then they beg and beg. And it never stops. There are thousands of them, so you can't connect with someone even if you want to. Because it is never ending. Like an avalanche of human pain and suffering. And your only hope to get through it at all is to not make eye contact.

Is this just the case in Agra or did you experience it in Delhi too?

I have been everywhere in India. Agra really sucks. Unless you have a real passion for the Taj Mahal, it's not worth it.

[Anonymous]

Kolkata is so crowded and polluted now! But Bengali food is the best Indian food of all!

OP, you sound incredibly naive. Why don’t you watch some travel programs and see some documentaries. India is stimulating beyond anything, and in many ways it’s absolutely gorgeous. People can be very warm there. At the same time, the year numbers of people, as well as the astounding poverty can be really overwhelming. If you go, she was carefully along the lines of what PP suggested about Kerala and Rajasthan. Do not go anywhere by yourselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The amount of poverty and classism is alarming.

You are expected just to ignore it and not make eye contact.

I don’t follow. Not make eye contact? With who?

Clearly you haven't been to India.

Hence the post, dummy

Sigh.

You can't really drive or walk through a city without being swarmed by poor people -- many of them very young children, many very physically deformed, crying and looking very said and begging. They stare until you make eye contact. Then they beg and beg. And it never stops. There are thousands of them, so you can't connect with someone even if you want to. Because it is never ending. Like an avalanche of human pain and suffering. And your only hope to get through it at all is to not make eye contact.

Is this just the case in Agra or did you experience it in Delhi too?

I have been everywhere in India. Agra really sucks. Unless you have a real passion for the Taj Mahal, it's not worth it.

Yes, I know Agra is like this, that’s why I was asking if Delhi is similar.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The amount of poverty and classism is alarming.

You are expected just to ignore it and not make eye contact.

I don’t follow. Not make eye contact? With who?

Clearly you haven't been to India.

Hence the post, dummy

Sigh.

You can't really drive or walk through a city without being swarmed by poor people -- many of them very young children, many very physically deformed, crying and looking very said and begging. They stare until you make eye contact. Then they beg and beg. And it never stops. There are thousands of them, so you can't connect with someone even if you want to. Because it is never ending. Like an avalanche of human pain and suffering. And your only hope to get through it at all is to not make eye contact.

Is this just the case in Agra or did you experience it in Delhi too?

DP, but I have Indian heritage and have been many times (to lots of places). It’s worse in some places than others, but it’s everywhere. It’s a function of the extremely unequal society/economy and the fact that the poor in India have absolutely no safety net. The poor literally live in slums or on the street, and there are literally hundreds of millions of them.