Nanny to help with second kid when you SAH

[Anonymous]

I’m a SAHM and I would just point out that if you never hire childcare, you only get solo time if your spouse is soloing with the kids. SAHMs need time off too. It doesn’t even have to be time fully off - going to the grocery store by myself is a wonderful break from kid grind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does here anyone SAH but also have a nanny or helper to assist with the second or third kid? What is your HHI?

Why can't you take care of the other child unless you are paying nanny for two children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I did, but she helped with one kid while the older one went to preschool a few times a week. The cost was not an issue for us.

What was the point of you?

[Anonymous]

American women are so lazy and their kids are horrible brats.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:American women are so lazy and their kids are horrible brats.

Um the majority of us never have hired help. In a lot of foreign countries help is actually more common than here. You’re also here so that you can presumably eventually become an American by the way so there’s that 😂

[Anonymous]

I am not SAH, but had 6 months off for our second. We kept our nanny full time even though our older child was in preschool. It was so fantastic and gave me a lot of downtime to recover and then catch up with all the house stuff. Plus there was no way we could reduce hours or let our nanny go for a few months. She wouldve (rightfully) found another full time job. HHI at 700-800k.

[Anonymous]

I’d do it temporarily, but not after the first few months.

Of course if we had the money of most of these posters maybe I’d feel differently. But send the toddler to preschool, that will help too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:American women are so lazy and their kids are horrible brats.

Why? Because they don’t have household help paid with slave wages or grandparents doing the heavy lifting? Yeah those non Americans are so hard working. Doing little of the work taking all the credit like you takes so much effort.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does here anyone SAH but also have a nanny or helper to assist with the second or third kid? What is your HHI?

You can't take care of two children at the same time? You should have considered your limitations prior to having a 2nd child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:American women are so lazy and their kids are horrible brats.

Why? Because they don’t have household help paid with slave wages or grandparents doing the heavy lifting? Yeah those non Americans are so hard working. Doing little of the work taking all the credit like you takes so much effort.

Because you have children that you cannot afford and you want to palm off their care to someone else. They are accessory children.

[Anonymous]

God how lazy can you be?

[Anonymous]

A lot of these posters with high earning spouses probably don’t have help from their spouses who are working very long hours at high level jobs. That’s my situation and it’s okay to have help. It’s better for everyone so the mom doesn’t get worn out. Look at the state of parents mental health in the US. It’s literally a crisis because there isn’t enough support and help. Sadly most can’t afford it but for those who can why wouldn’t you get whatever help you need to make your family situation positive and manageable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A lot of these posters with high earning spouses probably don’t have help from their spouses who are working very long hours at high level jobs. That’s my situation and it’s okay to have help. It’s better for everyone so the mom doesn’t get worn out. Look at the state of parents mental health in the US. It’s literally a crisis because there isn’t enough support and help. Sadly most can’t afford it but for those who can why wouldn’t you get whatever help you need to make your family situation positive and manageable.

Exactly. There’s no way I would do all the domestic labor for my high earning spouse with no help! I’m not sure I’d want a full time nanny but definitely a lot of help with newborns at home and of course with housework.

[Anonymous]

I’m planning to have a part-time nanny when second is born. But it will really depend on the baby. My first is the worst sleeper on earth with terrible separation anxiety so I was permanently exhausted and unable to complete any housework unless the baby was gone, so I needed a lot of childcare just to do basic things like shower, clean, cook, run errands.

If next kid is easier going, I will only use care once a week for a few hours for a break. My spouse works high level, long hours job and is not available to help during the day. We have no support from relatives. Hired care is necessary if you have no help.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:American women are so lazy and their kids are horrible brats.

Not always. I graduated from a T3 law school and moved my practice home to better take care of my autistic DD. So, yes, I had a nanny from 9-5 during office hours. Both kids (both SN) turned out great .DH was at work downtown. It was at times very difficult and expendive (SN tutors, specialusts, etc). Want to try being nasty and judgmental? Do women in your home country get to go to a top law school on scholarship?