Does anyone else not track their tween's location?

[Anonymous]

I certainly don't look at it often, but if he is running late and not picking up his phone, it's nice to have the option of seeing where he is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids are 17, 17, 14 and I have "find my phone" for each of them but I rarely use it.

My 17 year old son is super social and went through a "I'm going to attend every teen party in the DMV" phase when he was newly 16. I used it a bunch then because I never knew if he was in Potomac or DC or Arlington or Chevy Chase or... ?

Thankfully he's phased out of that. It's been a good 6 months since I ever checked to see where he is and months since he's even been to a party. I think he got it out of his system, plus junior year has just been a beast at school. Lots of weekends spent catching up on sleep and doing homework vs. socializing non-stop.

You didn’t know what city your own DC was in without using a tracker?? Very odd.

Huh. No. You know your teen's every move when they leave your house on Saturday night?
That is beyond weird.
I know when my kids leave and they know when they're supposed to be home (midnight) but I don't require them to tell me where they are the entire time.

That’s completely foreign to me. We are told where they are going, who will be there, and if parents will be at the home supervising.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I track mine so I can meet them for pickups. For example—When they take the bus home, I track so I can know when they will arrive at the drop off (it’s private school, so the pickup is far from our house), I track them when they are coming back on the team bus from a game, so I know when they arrive back at school. Things like that.

They can also track me so that when I’m coming to get them they can figure out where I am if I’m late. This is nice bc I don’t get calls asking where I am when I’m trying to drive.

This is essentially us as well. I generally only track her when I have to meet her, and need to know around what time I have to leave home. For instance, she has a field trip coming up. The window of arrival is dependent on traffic, so she'l

l text me when they start, and I'll track 30 minutes before scheduled arrival to see if they're still on track, or if I need to make adjustments.

Or she could just text you when she gets there and wait for you to show up. Or you could just wait at the stop at the estimated arrival time. Lots of options that don't involve tracking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I understand all the reasons it’s problematic. I do. But remember they’re all tracking each other on stupid Snapmap! And when my college age dd used my phone to find hers recently she discovered she had shared her location with me at some prior time when we were coordinating a pickup and learning that she still didn’t bother unsharing it. I think it’s actually kinda normal for kids to assume everyone can see where everyone is.

Not true. My kids do not turn their Snapmaps on. My daughter on the rare occasion when she wants her friends to see where she is. Otherwise, it's off.

[Anonymous]

Never tracked one kid--trusted them, they followed the rules once they started driving (for first year or so, text when heading to a new location and text again once arrived safely).

Started tracking the next kid--good kid but they kept forgetting to follow driving rules and didn't always text when heading to new locaiton/arriving. So we required tracking so we would know where they were.

Now we have added tracking the entire family when we go on vacations to Europe. Kids are over 20 and 25 and leave it on 99% of time.
I only track to know if they are home (and able to talk if needed) or at work or in class (and then only text/call if emergency)

[Anonymous]

Yes, I occasionally track on their Apple Watch through the "Find My Phone" feature.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I track mine so I can meet them for pickups. For example—When they take the bus home, I track so I can know when they will arrive at the drop off (it’s private school, so the pickup is far from our house), I track them when they are coming back on the team bus from a game, so I know when they arrive back at school. Things like that.

They can also track me so that when I’m coming to get them they can figure out where I am if I’m late. This is nice bc I don’t get calls asking where I am when I’m trying to drive.

This is essentially us as well. I generally only track her when I have to meet her, and need to know around what time I have to leave home. For instance, she has a field trip coming up. The window of arrival is dependent on traffic, so she'l

l text me when they start, and I'll track 30 minutes before scheduled arrival to see if they're still on track, or if I need to make adjustments.

Or she could just text you when she gets there and wait for you to show up. Or you could just wait at the stop at the estimated arrival time. Lots of options that don't involve tracking.

That worked with one teen when they learned to drive. They actually always texted upon arrival. They were never tracked until after college when they decided to add themselves to our tracking.


Other teen, kept forgetting to text. Rules in our house are you must text when heading out in car and again when arriving. I don't care where you are going (good kids, never heading somewhere trouble), but I need to know for the first year of driving when you are driving. That teen got tracked simply because they couldn't follow the rules.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids are 17, 17, 14 and I have "find my phone" for each of them but I rarely use it.

My 17 year old son is super social and went through a "I'm going to attend every teen party in the DMV" phase when he was newly 16. I used it a bunch then because I never knew if he was in Potomac or DC or Arlington or Chevy Chase or... ?

Thankfully he's phased out of that. It's been a good 6 months since I ever checked to see where he is and months since he's even been to a party. I think he got it out of his system, plus junior year has just been a beast at school. Lots of weekends spent catching up on sleep and doing homework vs. socializing non-stop.

You didn’t know what city your own DC was in without using a tracker?? Very odd.

Huh. No. You know your teen's every move when they leave your house on Saturday night?
That is beyond weird.
I know when my kids leave and they know when they're supposed to be home (midnight) but I don't require them to tell me where they are the entire time.

That’s completely foreign to me. We are told where they are going, who will be there, and if parents will be at the home supervising.

It's completely normal to me. I don't know anyone who tracks their teen's location (where are you going? who is going to be there?). I have two teens (16 and 17) and they each have about 6 good friends whose parents are my friends and no one knows exactly where their kids are on any Saturday night. These are all upper NW DC families.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids are 17, 17, 14 and I have "find my phone" for each of them but I rarely use it.

My 17 year old son is super social and went through a "I'm going to attend every teen party in the DMV" phase when he was newly 16. I used it a bunch then because I never knew if he was in Potomac or DC or Arlington or Chevy Chase or... ?

Thankfully he's phased out of that. It's been a good 6 months since I ever checked to see where he is and months since he's even been to a party. I think he got it out of his system, plus junior year has just been a beast at school. Lots of weekends spent catching up on sleep and doing homework vs. socializing non-stop.

You didn’t know what city your own DC was in without using a tracker?? Very odd.

Huh. No. You know your teen's every move when they leave your house on Saturday night?
That is beyond weird.
I know when my kids leave and they know when they're supposed to be home (midnight) but I don't require them to tell me where they are the entire time.

That’s completely foreign to me. We are told where they are going, who will be there, and if parents will be at the home supervising.

You literally ask your 17 year old who will be supervising them when they go to a friend's house??
WOW.
What is going to happen next year when they are in college? Will you contact the RA?

[Anonymous]

My teens track each other and their friends. Their friends do the same with SnapChat. I rarely check, but I have Find my phone on their phones.

[Anonymous]

Our whole family has location sharing turned on. We don't stalk each other, but it is useful for seeing where people are on the commute home from work, or whether DC's bus has left the track meet yet, etc. The kids use it when we are picking them up from activities. Or if we split up when we're out somewhere, we'll use the location to find each other again when we're ready to regroup for lunch or whatever. Sure we could do all of that over text or phone calls, but location sharing is just easier.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I certainly don't look at it often, but if he is running late and not picking up his phone, it's nice to have the option of seeing where he is.

Yup. This is how I roll as well.

[Anonymous]

Nope. No tracking here (17 and 19 year olds). They can call me or find someone else with a phone if they run into trouble. I don’t want to be their keepers that way.

[Anonymous]

DS is in 6th grade and has an Apple watch. We could track him but we don't. The only time we check is if he is late walking home from school. We like it for when we travel or go out. He can go off on his own a bit and we can contact him or he can contact us if needed. It is also handy for Scout camping and programs. I think we have actually looked for him twice and that ended up being because his practice at school went long and he wasn't able to call from inside the school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids are 17, 17, 14 and I have "find my phone" for each of them but I rarely use it.

My 17 year old son is super social and went through a "I'm going to attend every teen party in the DMV" phase when he was newly 16. I used it a bunch then because I never knew if he was in Potomac or DC or Arlington or Chevy Chase or... ?

Thankfully he's phased out of that. It's been a good 6 months since I ever checked to see where he is and months since he's even been to a party. I think he got it out of his system, plus junior year has just been a beast at school. Lots of weekends spent catching up on sleep and doing homework vs. socializing non-stop.

You didn’t know what city your own DC was in without using a tracker?? Very odd.

Huh. No. You know your teen's every move when they leave your house on Saturday night?
That is beyond weird.
I know when my kids leave and they know when they're supposed to be home (midnight) but I don't require them to tell me where they are the entire time.

That’s completely foreign to me. We are told where they are going, who will be there, and if parents will be at the home supervising.

You literally ask your 17 year old who will be supervising them when they go to a friend's house??
WOW.
What is going to happen next year when they are in college? Will you contact the RA?

DP. For me, having a parent home supervising older teens means that a parent is available in the home, just in case, not necessarily watching them, but being available. We have had a couple of occasions with our teens where the kids have shown really bad judgement and parents have stepped in to shut it down/contact emergency services, etc. I was thankful that they were there.