20 year old son using ketamine

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Oh OP, I am so sorry. Music scene + heavy weed use is enough of a reason to pull him out and to get him in to rehab. Weed is a real problem; I have a friend who is finally divorcing her husband who lost a job 10 years ago and hasn’t stopped smoking/vaping since. It has sapped him of any interest besides sourcing weed and getting high. he has become a degenerate drag on their family and this is all playing out in front of their 2 teens.

Your child knows addiction runs in Your family, right? I bet he also knows how worried you would be upon hearing he is using K. I wonder whether he told because he is worried, wants out, he isn’t sure how to initiate it and hopes you will. He is lucky to have you and to be comfortable enough in your relationship to send up this flare/cry for help.

Wishing you so much luck. Parenting is hard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stop paying his bills, ask him to take a semester off, come home and receive professional help. Staying alive and healthy is more important than staying in college.

OP here. Yeah this is where my head is

Professional help for what? Having fun and ignoring risk?

He'll hate you for ruining his life, even if you are preventing an OD. And you'll never know if you actually prevented an OD.

I love this parenting advice. It is akin to “let your 4 year old play with matches, he will have fun!” Or “let him drunk drive! He needs to have fun and seem cool! He will hate you if you take away the keys!”

That poor poster. He is a kid (perhaps still a kid) whose parents didn’t or don’t love him enough to care about whether he is healthy or even alive. So sad.

[Anonymous]

Your son wants you to help him. He told you about his use for a reason.

[Anonymous]

Agreed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stop paying his bills, ask him to take a semester off, come home and receive professional help. Staying alive and healthy is more important than staying in college.

OP here. Yeah this is where my head is

Professional help for what? Having fun and ignoring risk?

He'll hate you for ruining his life, even if you are preventing an OD. And you'll never know if you actually prevented an OD.

I love this parenting advice. It is akin to “let your 4 year old play with matches, he will have fun!” Or “let him drunk drive! He needs to have fun and seem cool! He will hate you if you take away the keys!”

That poor poster. He is a kid (perhaps still a kid) whose parents didn’t or don’t love him enough to care about whether he is healthy or even alive. So sad.

There's an in-between here. She doesn't have to cut him off and make demands. She can find a way working with him to support him in a way that will yield more positive results. I'm not sure a strong-arm "you're detoxing" is the answer, just like "it's fine, go get high" isn't either.

[Anonymous]

It's good to take it seriously. Maybe you can talk with him to figure out a way to help him see the risk and get him help.

[Anonymous]

Agree with PPs about test strips and Narcan.

Get him those immediately, and work on a long term/better strategy in the meantime.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That is terrible advice, OP. Kids want boundaries and parents who care enough to help stop destructive behavior. They neither want nor respect parents who enable it by condoning it and financing it. No kid would want that. My goodness that advice is warped.

+1

You need to tell him you dont want him to ever use it again. And you want him to stop all drugs. And if he cannot stop cold turkey then you plan to intervene and connect him with medical professionals and treatment centers, and possibly change universities.

Let him know you adore him and grateful he shared this information. Tell him you’re not judging at all, but you’re not willing to let him go down a road of self destruction. He is your son and you will protect him.

They need this. Be firm, non judgemental and take charge.

[Anonymous]

Get a several Narcan and make sure he has it in a variety of places in his apartment (and not just one that he won't be able to find). The DC government will send any residents a pack of 2 for free and it arrives in about a week.

I would speak with an addiction counselor about how to tread going forward on this. It's tricky waters. You desperately need him to keep engaging with you.

[Anonymous]

I was just googling , and it sounds super dangerous. Sorry OP…maybe pull him out of school for residential substance abuse treatment?

[Anonymous]

It's been 6 months. I wonder what has happened?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Make sure they know about fentanyl and have Narcan with them. There are resources for testing substances for fentanyl too.

In terms of risk—safety means not using alone, not leaving a friend, not mixing with alcohol.

Long term risks—ketamine users develop tolerance quickly and ingest larger and larger quantities. In the UK there are a lot of case studies of intravenous use causing permanent organ damage, particularly to the bladder.

Bolded above is very good and important advice, an important first step. Please do this and focus on it first. Get DC buy in on this first and then proceeded with other steps and interventions.