Saw my friend’s husband flirting with other women

[Anonymous]

OP still hasn't come back to say how the guy was "laying it on thick."

Like, did he ask the women to come up to his room later or did he tell them they look nice and their husband must be lucky men.

Or did he, oh god, smile and have chemistry with people of the opposite sex!!!!!!

[Anonymous]

My husband is one of those people who when he converses with women at a social event makes them feel important because he is naturally inquisitive and a very positive person. Many women later say to me “I love your husband!” and I know what they mean. He’s the CEO of a big company and he knows how to make everyone feel special. I know he’s not flirting with intent, he’s just being who he is. He will still flirt with intent with me and he’s very effective.

[Anonymous]

Who cares? Not your business.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d be kind of impressed if my DH flirted with one woman, let alone two.

This. I'm French, H is American and you guys can't flirt at all. AT all. It's either clutching pearls or crude pick up, nothing in between.

I'm French too, and now I come to think of it, you're right. The only men who can properly flirt are non-Americans. Flirt, as in, nothing vulgar, no propositioning, just entertaining ways of letting the other person know they're interesting and attractive.

[Anonymous]

Is it your best friend’s DH? Or DH of a casual friend? How well do you know the friend and her DH?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP still hasn't come back to say how the guy was "laying it on thick."

Like, did he ask the women to come up to his room later or did he tell them they look nice and their husband must be lucky men.

Or did he, oh god, smile and have chemistry with people of the opposite sex!!!!!!

Oh dear. You ought to calm down a bit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP go read your bible and knit something. This is not a big deal.

No kidding. Flirting is a way to know that you still have a pulse and enjoyment of other people.

Plus you have no idea what their relationship is like. My husband does this and comes home to tell me about it in good fun. It’s healthy.

Bizarre that someone would need to flirt to know they still have a pulse and enjoy the company of others.

Maybe they recently opened their relationship.

[Anonymous]

All I can say is, DO NOT be the one to tell your friend unless you want her to be an ex-friend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All I can say is, DO NOT be the one to tell your friend unless you want her to be an ex-friend.

But you could ask her if they'd opened their relationship recently. If you like drama

[Anonymous]

I think it’s called charisma.

Nothing wrong with connecting with people, an arm pat, chatting a bit and maybe sharing a laugh or two.

Why so dour OP?

There are lots of ways of being in this world. I know that some men can be pigs and it’s true that charismatic men tend to have more opportunities to express the pig… an un-penned pig will poke around sniffing and truffling about here and there always looking for opportunities to be unearth some strange with his little snout.

But if your friend married him then she already knows this, she may even enjoy it, as she’s the one who snagged the guy who came onto everyone. You know the type “He’s flirting with you but “eventually” he’s coming home to me.’

MYOB

[Anonymous]

Oh who cares. Even if he was flirting - really, who cares. MYOB.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’d be kind of impressed if my DH flirted with one woman, let alone two.

This. I'm French, H is American and you guys can't flirt at all. AT all. It's either clutching pearls or crude pick up, nothing in between.

I'm French too, and now I come to think of it, you're right. The only men who can properly flirt are non-Americans. Flirt, as in, nothing vulgar, no propositioning, just entertaining ways of letting the other person know they're interesting and attractive.

What a reductive statement. You don’t make the French look good.

it just depends on the individual. There are some really cringe flirting tactics in more patriarchal cultures… Latin America, Southern Europe…

[Anonymous]

LOL Americans are so easily scandalized. Please do not come to Europe...we might flirt with your husband too!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who are you people posting "it's no big deal?" Flirting with others isn't a big deal if your spouse is aware and consents. If not, if you're hiding/doing it behind your spouse's back and would be embarrassed/ashamed/lie if caught, it's cheating and on the way to an EA.

I suspect the "nbd" types are either cheaters themselves and related to the guy OP caught, or only okay with it b/c it's OP's friend's partner (and you're assuming that's not your man).

There is a distinct line between friendly and flirty. If you're flirting with no intention of following through, you're leading someone on. Don't be a dick.

Appreciate this. I don’t normally think flirting is a deal breaker by any means but if my friend had seen this, she’d be devastated. It was over the line. There was physical touching, although not inappropriate touching. It was just bad.

"Devastated"?

Maybe a little over the top?

[Anonymous]

Hopefully whatever boundaries your friend has with her hubby have not been broken. Some couples are good with flirting and some are not. This all very situational.