Anyone else hate hosting?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hate it. I grew up with a wonderful mom who is the best hostess of everyone at any time, and I feel self-conscious I don't do it as well, get tons of anxiety. It's truly a huge aggravation to me, and I end up feeling resentful the few times I am truly forced to do it.

+1
I'm an anxious person, why put myself through it? It's a hair shy of torture for me. Then the next day I spend wondering if everyone had a good time.

[Anonymous]

I just read the thread about food at parties and it made me think about why I HATE hosting. Everyone has expectations that are too high. I don't want to have to make something to 'wow' you or cater for your special diet. I want your company if you are invited to my house, not to show off my non existent culinary/hosting skills. BTW, it's always on the woman to do this, never the man. If you have expectations like this or I feel that you do, chances are you will never get an invite. If you do get an invite then I view you as non judgey, so don't prove me wrong. I have been proved wrong by people; I totally misjudged them and thought they were more down to earth than they really are.

[Anonymous]

I don’t mind hosting a few friends for coffee or even when DD was little a playdate at our house because I knew people would leave after a couple hours.
Dinners or anything longer though, I’m with you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Core Gen X.

I had one dinner party for 3 colleagues in my early 30s.

1 bailed same day because she did a blood drive at work.

1 revealed she was pregnant at the meal so couldn't eat half of the menu. Also she and her husband left early because of tiredness.

Last guest bowed out early because she was the last/only.

Restaurants seem to be the only thing Gen X can handle.

I've never used any of the three sets of formal china that I inherited. Or most of my wedding presents (crystal candlesticks, champagne bucket).

I’m GenX and I love hosting and do it constantly, including using three sets of china and two sets of silver. I have a kid whose special needs make hosting way easier than taking him to other people’s houses or getting a babysitter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No I like hosting but to be fair, we hire help to make it easy. Cleaning crew before and after, catering, bartender, etc. We've even occasionally hired a neighborhood high school girl to come lead games and crafts for the little kids.

In terms of people leaving, we always provide an ending time for any party. For a small dinner with just two or three families we don't do that, but we're all socially capable of reading cues. We start cleaning, turn off music, and our guest start getting their coats and thanking us. It works out just fine.

Christ, I’m exhausted already just reading this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Core Gen X.

I had one dinner party for 3 colleagues in my early 30s.

1 bailed same day because she did a blood drive at work.

1 revealed she was pregnant at the meal so couldn't eat half of the menu. Also she and her husband left early because of tiredness.

Last guest bowed out early because she was the last/only.

Restaurants seem to be the only thing Gen X can handle.

I've never used any of the three sets of formal china that I inherited. Or most of my wedding presents (crystal candlesticks, champagne bucket).

What does hosting have to do with not using nice china? We use ours for holidays AND for occasional Sunday dinners. No excuses not to use what you have. If you aren’t going to use it, sell it or give it away. Zero excuse not to use it.

[Anonymous]

I love hosting, and don’t feel any need for anyone to reciprocate whatsoever. If i invite you, it means I want you to come.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Core Gen X.

I had one dinner party for 3 colleagues in my early 30s.

1 bailed same day because she did a blood drive at work.

1 revealed she was pregnant at the meal so couldn't eat half of the menu. Also she and her husband left early because of tiredness.

Last guest bowed out early because she was the last/only.

Restaurants seem to be the only thing Gen X can handle.

I've never used any of the three sets of formal china that I inherited. Or most of my wedding presents (crystal candlesticks, champagne bucket).

You don't represent Gen X... I use my three sets of formal china and have had many, many gatherings of all sizes through the years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Hate hosting and hate being hosted at others house. Rather meet at neutral location.

+1
Same here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t enjoy hosting either! If I was a great cook, maybe I’d like it more. I thought when kids got older, I’d enjoy it more. Nope, they’re in college and I still don’t like it!

Yes! Mine are all in college now so I have no excuse - except that I don't enjoy it and don't like cooking! I wish I did, but oh well.

[Anonymous]

This is why I stopped attending our neighborhood book club. The person whose turn it was to host always had to put on an elaborate lunch or dinner for the whole group, and I just am not interested in performing like that. It's too bad because I'd love to socialize with these women, but I'm interested in anything more than wine and cheese or coffee and pastries.

[Anonymous]

*not interested ^^

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hate it. I grew up with a wonderful mom who is the best hostess of everyone at any time, and I feel self-conscious I don't do it as well, get tons of anxiety. It's truly a huge aggravation to me, and I end up feeling resentful the few times I am truly forced to do it.

My sister is an amazing hostess and cook. She makes it look so fun. I’m an anxious mess and always wondering if people are enjoying themselves. The next day I’m always wondering if I said something stupid or did something to embarrass myself. I do enjoy going to friend's houses.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Core Gen X.

I had one dinner party for 3 colleagues in my early 30s.

1 bailed same day because she did a blood drive at work.

1 revealed she was pregnant at the meal so couldn't eat half of the menu. Also she and her husband left early because of tiredness.

Last guest bowed out early because she was the last/only.

Restaurants seem to be the only thing Gen X can handle.

I've never used any of the three sets of formal china that I inherited. Or most of my wedding presents (crystal candlesticks, champagne bucket).

You don't represent Gen X... I use my three sets of formal china and have had many, many gatherings of all sizes through the years.

PP with the dinner party fail. We are still after decades in the position of spending holidays at my parents because they have the bigger house, table, and ALSO three more sets of fine china, LOL. It's more pleasant to be around the big table.

All my friends are harried women MBA middle managers. They only do restaurants. One bad experience was enough for me.

Zero bosses host subordinates at my company. Therefore zero subordinates reciprocate.

Occasionally some kind soul throws a shower or a housewarming.

Never claimed to speak for all Gen X. Just explaining why I have all this stuff.

[Anonymous]

I hosted a rager last night. People asked if I had a good time. I said, well it’s easier being the guest but I’m happy to reciprocate and take a turn being host as well.