| I think my concern would be less on when he's going to/needs to move out, and more on what his future will be job-wise and will it not only pay the bills but will he eventually be able to pick up his own health insurance, cover emergencies such as a car that needs major work, etc. |
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Two of ours lived with us well into their 20s, but were saving money for a downpayment on a house. It's the only way they could have afforded a home and were able to buy before interest rates went up. The third lived with us about 6 months after college to save money for apt. rent, deposits, and a little cushion when on their own.
I thought it made sense and enjoyed their company. We didn't charge rent and would never have kicked them out. Home is home. |
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You want your kids to be as independent as they can, especially financially. They don't have to be wealthy but they need to be able to manage problems on their own. We can't rescue them all the time.
They can be independent and still live at home in order to save money to move out. Gotta pay some bills, any bills. |
| I don't know what is "normal", but I had two bouts back at home in my adulthood. Once after college and once after a breakup. It was always known to me that there would be a bed for me whenever I needed it, no pressure to ever move out but I was always supported when I did. I plan to be the same for my children. |
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20 is still super young.
I'd say 25 is probably normal. If your kid is pushing 30 and still at home sure, have a conversation. But not 20. |
This. I don’t expect my early 20 somethings to be completely settled down and established, if they do a little moving around, including coming back home for a stint that’s alright. Now is the time for them to get things figured out. |
| Mine all moved out soon after college graduation and getting a job. They each had a bunch of roommates and they sometimes lived in pretty dumpy places but they wanted to be out on their own. We never subsidized them them or gave them allowances in college so they were prepared to survive. Eventually they got nicer places with fewer roommates and they were all married by age 27 or so. |
| I would try to convince him to get a college degree or some sort of trade certification. |
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I moved out at 29 and my Mom would have been happy to have me stay.
She was a widow and I paid a $200 a month rent, shoveled her driveway, mowed lawn, did all home repairs, fixed her car if I could, unloaded groceries. My 24 year old sister also was at home and she also paid $200 a month rent and helped out. If mom hosted thanksgiving, Xmas or 4th of July we help her and if a wedding or party starts brine else house we drove her. I lived at home because I loved to ski on weekends, fly away in spring break, get a share in summer house in summer and paying full rent I could not afford to do it plus I be leaving apartment I am paying for empty like 20 weekends a year. Yea I dated and got married. |
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not so sure about the "white" normal thing...that was strange...but anyway...mine stayed until their late twenties after college which was long enough to pay off student loan debt and build a respectable savings for when they did move out. I did not charge them rent.
I'll never understand why it's so shameful to not kick kids out when they're 18, there's a difference between being shiftless in your basement vs. working towards a goal to start out on a high note financially...I wish my parents had done the same for me.... |
| ^^ it's also a good time to counsel them on debt, investing, net worth, etc....all the things schools don't teach them, not even college... |