Lack of independent play is creating mental health crisis among kids today -- and overprotective parenting is to blame

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Most everyone who is replying here realizes that this would be beneficial for their child yet is coming up with excuses as to why they can't or won't do it. Kinda sad, really.

The first step to making this happen here is to drastically reduce screen time. That isn't easy but it then forces their hand. For our children, they will play some inside but there is only so much of that they will do until they go outside to play. Access to screens just short-circuits this dynamic. Also, we make regular visits to some of the bigger playground parks - there are always kids and they love these trips. Our kids are all under 12 and we've been doing this their whole lives so YMMV.

Do you work?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Life sucks for people with young kids. I’ve got unlimited funds and it still is insanely hard.

We weren’t designed to raise children with zero help. I’d love it if those from the 70s would tackle gun control rather than offering dumb obvious thoughts. Then we maybe could let our kids wander outside. Parenrs don’t want your thoughts.

Get to work or shut up (actually, and).

Unlimited funds?

Hire help or dial back or quit your job.

It should not be insanely hard for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just heard this. I kept waiting for the person being interviewed to mention two income households as a reason that kids aren’t out playing unsupervised in the neighborhood. All the kids are in aftercare or daycare because both parents work. Have kids go play on Friday afternoon? Whose home on a Friday afternoon?

It’s this. Parents aren’t home. Kids are either with a nanny or daycare. Everyone is over scheduled. Kids do camps in the summer. The days of kids being at home to play and head outside are over. You’re almost looked down upon if you are a SAHM who chills at home during the summer and doesn’t have structured activities planned for their kids.

Yes! We never have camps in the summer and people look down at us, like what else is there?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just heard this. I kept waiting for the person being interviewed to mention two income households as a reason that kids aren’t out playing unsupervised in the neighborhood. All the kids are in aftercare or daycare because both parents work. Have kids go play on Friday afternoon? Whose home on a Friday afternoon?

It’s this. Parents aren’t home. Kids are either with a nanny or daycare. Everyone is over scheduled. Kids do camps in the summer. The days of kids being at home to play and head outside are over. You’re almost looked down upon if you are a SAHM who chills at home during the summer and doesn’t have structured activities planned for their kids.

Yes! We never have camps in the summer and people look down at us, like what else is there?

They are jealous or insecure. Jealous because you apparently don't need camps for childcare, or insecure because they don't need them for childcare either but don't want their kids at home all summer.

We usually do a few weeks of camp for socializing and then let DD hang out at home the other weeks -- free play mixed with trips to the pool, plus family visits and vacations. I think it's a perfect balance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just heard this. I kept waiting for the person being interviewed to mention two income households as a reason that kids aren’t out playing unsupervised in the neighborhood. All the kids are in aftercare or daycare because both parents work. Have kids go play on Friday afternoon? Whose home on a Friday afternoon?

My kids never played outside unsupervised because we live in a city and that's not safe.

I grew up in DC in the nineties and we were outside with no adults all the time

[Anonymous]

I wonder if all the parental engineering of friendships contributes to depression.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Most everyone who is replying here realizes that this would be beneficial for their child yet is coming up with excuses as to why they can't or won't do it. Kinda sad, really.

The first step to making this happen here is to drastically reduce screen time. That isn't easy but it then forces their hand. For our children, they will play some inside but there is only so much of that they will do until they go outside to play. Access to screens just short-circuits this dynamic. Also, we make regular visits to some of the bigger playground parks - there are always kids and they love these trips. Our kids are all under 12 and we've been doing this their whole lives so YMMV.

Do you work?

No

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I just heard this. I kept waiting for the person being interviewed to mention two income households as a reason that kids aren’t out playing unsupervised in the neighborhood. All the kids are in aftercare or daycare because both parents work. Have kids go play on Friday afternoon? Whose home on a Friday afternoon?

It’s this. Parents aren’t home. Kids are either with a nanny or daycare. Everyone is over scheduled. Kids do camps in the summer. The days of kids being at home to play and head outside are over. You’re almost looked down upon if you are a SAHM who chills at home during the summer and doesn’t have structured activities planned for their kids.

Eh a lot of aftercare and daycare is pretty unstructured. And there's no reason a nanny cannot encourage free play. I think parents just feel pressured to fill time with activities rather than anything unstructured.

[Anonymous]

So this is just his guess? It’s not very coherent. School has a lot of free play basically unsupervised time built into it, especially aftercare and before care. Basically the same as his ‘grandparent’ suggestion. Also There are lots of kids in Asia and in other parts of the world who have lots of chores or academic duties and who aren’t depressed. I hated free play as a kid. Some kids find their meaning in work/chores/helping the family. This guy is not very convincing and the interview is a word salad. ‘Go outside you will be happier!’ Sometimes that’s true, sometimes not.

[Anonymous]

It's too many choices and too much freedom causing mental health issues today.

[Anonymous]

How does one make sense of a world where people have to accept all ways of life. I was just watching a youtube video where a woman was saying she shouldn't be judged by society and society was actually the mean behavior if they complained about her lifestyle. She had her husband take photos for her only fans page so she can go out on dates and have sex with many people and even call him to pay for these dates, but she won't allow him to date anyone else. There is no order in the world that kids can rely on. Literally people can do anything these days. It's scary to me too.

[Anonymous]

Come on. This research was published in the Journal of Spurious Correlations https://www.tylervigen.com/spurious-correlations

Dude took two decades long trends and simply declared that one caused the other.

Hey let's draw a chart comparing half-century trends in child mental to health vs, I dunno, say, mass shootings of children, or air and water pollution, or high-carb high-grease diets, or cost of living.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How does one make sense of a world where people have to accept all ways of life. I was just watching a youtube video where a woman was saying she shouldn't be judged by society and society was actually the mean behavior if they complained about her lifestyle. She had her husband take photos for her only fans page so she can go out on dates and have sex with many people and even call him to pay for these dates, but she won't allow him to date anyone else. There is no order in the world that kids can rely on. Literally people can do anything these days. It's scary to me too.

Perfect example of a man whose mental health suffers due to a lack of freedom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's too many choices and too much freedom causing mental health issues today.

Too much freedom? How so?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So this is just his guess? It’s not very coherent. School has a lot of free play basically unsupervised time built into it, especially aftercare and before care. Basically the same as his ‘grandparent’ suggestion. Also There are lots of kids in Asia and in other parts of the world who have lots of chores or academic duties and who aren’t depressed. I hated free play as a kid. Some kids find their meaning in work/chores/helping the family. This guy is not very convincing and the interview is a word salad. ‘Go outside you will be happier!’ Sometimes that’s true, sometimes not.

But, even if kids and young teens for that matter, say that they don't like or want to go outside and have free play, they need it. It's good for them.